"she had a fanny like a burst badger"
It's pretty hard to put me off my food as obviously I'm an internet LOLfatty. As we all are.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 13:58, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

eeeow that's grim
and i thought britney's "badly packed spotty kebab" was grim.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 13:59, Reply)

she didn't speak too highly of your ladyparts either.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:00, Reply)

this is a total lie
they are immaculately smoothly waxed, so clean you could eat your dinner from them, and tighter than a byford dolphin diving bell chamber.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:03, Reply)

POIDH
A gaz will be fine.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:07, Reply)

i'll add it to the request list
expect your clunge-gaz in 19-21 years
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:08, Reply)

won't it be wrinkly by then?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:09, Reply)

She'll be about my age you cheeker bugger.

( girlinthehole, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:10, Reply)

oops

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:11, Reply)

you're 55?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:16, Reply)

No 46.
I thought Swipey was mid twenties.
( girlinthehole, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:17, Reply)

you've met me
i really do love you
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:18, Reply)

Haha!
I would never have guessed mid thirties?
( girlinthehole, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:20, Reply)

Haha
Fuck, she's old.
( Kroney, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:24, Reply)

early thirties
you snivelling little manchild
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:27, Reply)

A manchild I am
but little and snivelling, I am not.

Anyway, shut up, grandma.
( Kroney, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:28, Reply)

to be fair, so did I, but she's not.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:18, Reply)

well
i was when i started posting on here.

sigh.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:19, Reply)

snap.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:20, Reply)

cheers, but I'll be too old to care by then
Never mind, I'm sure I'll cope.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:10, Reply)

no you won't
you'll still care. you might not be able to act on it though.

like "family guy" where the old dude is hitting his crotch and hollering: "work, damn you!"
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:11, Reply)

Meh, I'm sure it's lovely and all....
but I doubt it's worth the wait
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:13, Reply)

reverse psychology almost works

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:18, Reply)

no, reverse psychology would be being the person that never asked y.....

oh, hang on.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:19, Reply)

i'm so sleepy after a giant burrito
and getting up at 6am for the gym. urgh.

can't you wake me up?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:20, Reply)

Sorry petal ... work calls.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:23, Reply)

Really?
I doubt it, you're about as likely to actually gaz anyone on here pictures of body parts as I am to cry myself to sleep over not having seen your fanny.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:22, Reply)

sadly
i have done it before. in the past.

actually.... that was by text.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:26, Reply)

Oh yeah?
To a b3tan? I've sent mms messages of bits and bobs to girlfiends before, but that's different.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:28, Reply)

The trouble with being a man
is that you only have the one bit and bob to send.
( Kroney, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:30, Reply)

Yes, I thought of that as I typed it. It went down well though.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:31, Reply)

I never have a problem with it going down.
it's keeping it up that gives me problems.

HAHAHA

*cries*
( Kroney, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:32, Reply)

Poor kroney.
Tell you what, you seduce them, turn out the light and i'll nip in and service them and then nip out again so you can do all the cuddling and shit, sound fair?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:33, Reply)

An nice arse shot is always welcome.

( girlinthehole, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:32, Reply)

If only I had a nice arse.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:33, Reply)

Pfft!

( girlinthehole, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:36, Reply)

A saggy hairy one, however
often offends
( Kroney, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:34, Reply)

you want a picture of a 9atm explosive decompression of a dive chamber?
freak.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:09, Reply)

burst badger dead hedgehog
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:00, Reply)

man, if it had spines even I would think twice.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:01, Reply)

only about where to stick it

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:03, Reply)

well, yeah, "in someone else"
I feel.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:04, Reply)

i meant whereabouts into the spiny burst hedgehog
sigh. don't make me revoke your crown as "reasonably intelligent board member", mm-kay?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:07, Reply)

I know you did.
I was merely maintaining that I have some standards.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:08, Reply)

like i don't know you better than that by now

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:08, Reply)

I've never asked you for a titgaz
that makes me pretty much morally untouchable on here, surely?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:09, Reply)

true
in this particular land of the blind, you as the one-eyed man are king.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:10, Reply)

A slice of ham on a barbershop's floor.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:01, Reply)

quorn curtains.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:01, Reply)

Vegetarian friendly!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 23 Aug 2011, 14:02, Reply)