I hate not being a techy geek as then installing Microsoft Office 2010 wouldn't be such a fucking ballache.
What area of expertise would you like to be skilled in?

alt: Shall I go out tonight or finish my lesson planning?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 20:56, 91 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

music. I wish I was a natural musician
but really I'm just an annoyingly bad amateur.

alt: go out. or stay in and drink red wine like meeeee! I should be doing so many things, but instead I watched 2 Fireflys and about 1/3 of and episode of red dwarf which someone on youtube hadn't uploaded the rest of, gits!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:26, Reply)

oh yeah
and I've decided how to decorate one of the rooms inthe house I'm buying based on something from firefly. There is nothing wrong with this at all
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:27, Reply)

What firefly theme are you thinking?
Red wine tastes like bad ribena.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:45, Reply)

no no no no no
not firefly theme, it just gave me an idea is all.

red wine tastes like dark angels wrapping their love around your tongue
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:53, Reply)

red wine tastes like satan's butt monkeys monthly fanny drippings.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:55, Reply)

off to hell to
cunniginus up some butt monkeys

brb
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:55, Reply)

click

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:00, Reply)

click your face!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:02, Reply)

I think I'd like to be a bit more computer techy too :(
As far as old-school technical and hands-on stuff goes I'm pretty gifted.
I've built a house from scratch, including all services, joinery, plumbing (obviously), electrics, roofing, structural steelwork, the whole caboodle. Except plastering. Yup, that's the one. Can't skim a ceiling to save my life.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:28, Reply)

You need a steady hand for skimming, the DT's don't help ;)

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:39, Reply)

Are you still up?
Surely it's past your bedtime.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:57, Reply)

Just off to the pub now B69

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:06, Reply)

Office 2010?
You put the disk in and press install. There's nothing more to it.
( Peej, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:44, Reply)

I've bought it froM STudent software
and it won't download it is pissing me off.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:46, Reply)

Evening BENDERS!!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:49, Reply)

oi oi

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:50, Reply)

How is the land of the free treating you?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:51, Reply)

amazing, I don't want to leave to be honest.
Have you been drinking?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:53, Reply)

Not this evening.
I'm going out for a few tomorrow.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:53, Reply)

On a sunday! disgraceful

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:55, Reply)

It gets better.
I'm going out WITH A BIRD.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:56, Reply)

no.fucking.way.!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:57, Reply)

It's true I tells ya.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:01, Reply)

moar details!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:03, Reply)

I was in a pub on Friday with a mate
She came over to me as she was leaving to say she thought I looked nice.

I said, 'I'm going out for dinner with friends shortly, but if you want to give me your number I'll speak to you over the weekend'

She did, so I called her today and offered to take her out tomorrow.

What surprises me more than the fact she came over to speak to me, was the fact she is really attractive - AND she was sober.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:05, Reply)

YAY!
good luck, dog fucker

teip one: don't tell her you fuck dogs
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:08, Reply)

That'll just be a secret I keep between ourselves and the rest of OT.
But thanks for the timely reminder.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:09, Reply)

well you don't get luck like this all the time
you should totally make the most of it. Are you taking her to a local greggs to eat pasties and look at the ducks?

(the ducks being inthe park nearby)
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:12, Reply)

Nah. I thought I'd take her to a Harvester.
All being well, she won't have been to one before and I can look well flash as I tell her to help herself to the salad cart.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:13, Reply)

that's pretty flashy - she could have as many baps as she liked. but there are 2 problems
1) no pasties. girls dig pasties
2) no ducks. Classy girls dig ducks
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:14, Reply)

The Harvester in Frenchy used to have a fish-pond in it and you could feed your bread-rolls to the fish.
I mean, a proper fish pond, in the pub. With big gold fish in it.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:16, Reply)

take her there!
big goldfish that eat bread rolls are like underwater ducks. You'll totally get sex if you do that!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:16, Reply)

if nothing else you might
get noshed off by a goldfish
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:17, Reply)

The pond was still there in 2008!
www.touchbristol.com/business/list/bid/2002467

According to that review.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:20, Reply)

then it is settled!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:25, Reply)

No Captain.
I'm not going there. Not on your nellie (whatever your nellie is).
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:26, Reply)

then where are you going
you know, just so we can be sure you're not being murdered and not in any way to get a bunch of us to spy on you or nothing
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:30, Reply)

We're going 'out'

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:31, Reply)

*makes notes*

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:32, Reply)

I'll give you 3 rings when I get home safely if you like.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:33, Reply)

no bother
we'll just have a spy network reporting on you

you gonna wear your best pants?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:40, Reply)

On a first date.
On a school night?!?!

of course I will!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:45, Reply)

I've not been there in more than 20 years
I'd imagine it would have been redecorate since and I'll bet they worked out that having a large fish pond in the pub was a rubbish business decision.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:17, Reply)

or the fish got really big and are now
the new management
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:18, Reply)

I wonder if they'd change the menu and sell Human Fingers
Rather than Fish ones.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:20, Reply)

don't be crazy!
humans don't have fingers
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:26, Reply)

^ Confirmed head-dobber user right there folks!
:)
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:27, Reply)

the cool kids
head dob
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:30, Reply)

bahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:53, Reply)

Alright Cap'n!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:54, Reply)

ARLLLLLRRRIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGGGGGGTTTTTTTTTTT!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:55, Reply)

Would I be right in thinking that maybe you've had some booze?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:55, Reply)

yes
it's red
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:56, Reply)

How much have you had?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:01, Reply)

about 3/4 of a bottle

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:03, Reply)

*Chants*
Down in one, down in one, down in one....
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:05, Reply)

i down inone'd
the last bit of glass. might oput the rest of it in a glass now. No point wasting it

I made fajitas today with chillies which I grew myself!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:13, Reply)

You should do Captain.
You need to let your yellow hair down once in a while.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:14, Reply)

ironically
this is one of the few times I have it tied up
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:18, Reply)

alright homosexualists?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:06, Reply)

P to the D

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:07, Reply)

Next level ill shit, bitch.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:10, Reply)

You got the lurgy that has been doing the rounds?
I had a cold that lingered for about 3 weeks.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:10, Reply)

no.
I mean 'ill' in the Beastie Boys sense.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:13, Reply)

You gotta fight for your right.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:14, Reply)

Party for your right to fight.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:15, Reply)

those guys need more vitamin c

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:14, Reply)

I totally want these curtain in
my bedroom
www.diy.com/diy/jsp/bq/nav.jsp?action=detail&fh_oneslice=true&fh_view_size=10&fh_eds=%3f&fh_location=%2f%2fcatalog01%2fen_GB%2fcategories%3C{9372013}%2fcategories%3C{9372026}%2fcategories%3C{9372114}%2fspecificationsProductType%3dready_made_curtains%2fstyleStyle%3E{dinosaurs}&fh_secondid=10547869

look how happy the dinosaurs are!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:19, Reply)

Post a picture.
The link is all broken.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:21, Reply)

I can't handle that right now
try copying the whole thing and pasting it or looking at dinosaur curtains on B&Q site
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:25, Reply)

You could get a dinosaur lamp as well
search.diy.com/diy/Dinosaur%20Lamp

EDIT: I've been on the B&Q website and I have to say, I've seen happier dinosaurs.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:28, Reply)

colour changing!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:29, Reply)

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2036663/Marks-Spencer-sends-cheeky-customer-smiley-dinosaur-drawing.html
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:31, Reply)

yay
like those dudes who ask for pictures on their pizza boxes
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:34, Reply)

I don't know anything about that.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:35, Reply)

www.buzzfeed.com/awesomer/11-special-instructions-for-pizza-delivery-place
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:40, Reply)

hahahahaha
That's brilliant.

What would you ask for? 'No coal dust finger prints on the box' would fuck them right over.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:44, Reply)

a classic
pecker should do the trick
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:50, Reply)

what on earth is a classic pecker?
Is that a pizza made with chicken lips.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:51, Reply)

pff!
nope! Have you spent no time on /board? magenta cock, three hairs per ball, spunk optional
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:53, Reply)

Would spunk count as an extra topping and therefore cost extra?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:58, Reply)

i'd hope it would be free
but since I'm approaching 'feeling sorry for myself' stage of drunk I'd say it's a rare commodity these day
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 22:59, Reply)

I'm sure someone will offer you their jizz soon.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 23:06, Reply)

7 billions people in the world...

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 23:13, Reply)

You could be the cum bucket for all of them.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 23:15, Reply)

you know girls don't make spunks, don't you?
if not you should wikipedia 'girls' before tomorrow
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 23:16, Reply)

hehhehhehe
Sorry Captain.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 23:18, Reply)

Criminal at lager
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2060655/Free-beer-offer-leads-police-19-suspects-linked-string-unsolved-crimes.html
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 23:25, Reply)

so you fell for it
right?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 23:27, Reply)

OUT OUT OUT!!!!!
Go on, go out.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 23:32, Reply)

.I d.id alrigh.it n and nw I have to be in schol in 11/37 ,minisutses/

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 13 Nov 2011, 6:33, Reply)