think janice in "friends"
that kind of thing. leopard print and fake gold.

he is mostly straight acting but can really turn on the campness if required.

he IS ginger though.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:45, 2 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

you still would tho, right?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:46, Reply)

any girl would
he's tall, lean but muscled, good looking, dresses beautifully, smells amazing, funny, clever, nice... of COURSE he's gay.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:48, Reply)

your right, i';m all of these things and i'm totally partial to a bit of sausage

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:50, Reply)

I resent that suggestion
I am at least some of those.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:51, Reply)

i remember going to see the backstreet boys with my gay mate nick
who has the worst gaydar in the world. he asked me how i could tell which guys were gay. of course, 99% of them were, at that particular venue. the gay guys looked to be all that i have described above. then there was the occasional specimen wearing shit ill-fitting jeans, with a bad haircut, yelling something about "fucking pussy" and trying to carry 6 pints of stella in each hand.

i don't think nick had really given any sympathy to what it means to be a woman until that night.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:52, Reply)

Well let's see now
Your criteria:

tall - er, ok not really. 5'11". Probably taller than you though?
lean but muscled - er, bugger. I play plenty of sport and go to the gym once or twice a week. Not bad for a man of my vintage I suppose.
good looking - ok, we'll maybe come back to that
dresses beautifully - oh fuck sake this is getting difficult now
smells amazing - what on earth does that mean?
funny - well, yes - people laugh at me - does that count?
clever - captain of my pub quiz team - is that good enough?
nice - sorry, epic fail.

Conclusion - must try harder.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)

the question marks speak volumes
you are straight.

prosecution rests.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:04, Reply)

Well my GF, ex-wife and thousands of ladies around the world will be delighted to hear that.
Ta.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:07, Reply)

thousands?
really?

nice work. but do get tested, ok bro?!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:08, Reply)

Lolz
I meant thousands of potentials darling, although I do prefer your interpretation.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:13, Reply)

I'm all of those things and I'm actually not gay
Except tall. Lean might be an exaggeration. Good-looking is a matter of opinion. And I smell variable.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:51, Reply)

don't knock it til you try it

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:55, Reply)

Try what, exactly?
Being tall? Smelling nice all the time? Gayness?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)

have a taste of cock, iof you don't like it fair enough but you don't know til you try

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:02, Reply)

I have tried it
I've no problem with it.

You?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:07, Reply)

fucken love it i do

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:17, Reply)

Ooh... yeah that makes sense.
Or Davina McCall. And Fearne Cotton. All affected annoying twatishness.
Yeah. Women can be camp. And camp women are just as head-stamp worthy.
Good; I'm not a homophobe. I was worried for a moment there.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:51, Reply)

i think he would agree with you
you have nailed the phenomenon.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:53, Reply)

Campness is not really a gay thing.
My friend's ex was very camp but was totally straight. He often played the whole camp think up when people thought he was gay. He was a hairdresser too.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:53, Reply)

Good point. I know a straight camp man too.
And I'd stamp on his head given the chance as well.
There's just a MASSIVE overlap of gay and camp on the venn diagram of EVERYONE and CAMPNESS.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:56, Reply)

It is more prevelant in the gay community is all.
What about the commedian who swam the channel. He's always camping it up but has a hot model girlfriend.

Edit - David Walliams.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:59, Reply)

David Walliams loves teh cock
whether he is married or not
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:01, Reply)

He is also not a comedian
by any definition of the term
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:02, Reply)