Good morning. I hope you are all well today.
Why do I find camp men so dislikable?
It isn't a homophobia thing. For example, there are three pooves in my office. Two of them I consider good mates. The third one is camp and I want to stamp on his face until his eyes explode.
Also, I'm finding it difficult to define campness in my head. I can recognise it, but I'm not sure how. Is it possible for a woman to be camp? While the idea seems plausible, I'm finding it difficult to visualise.
There. That's my attempt at conversation. The end.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:28, 167 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

7/10

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:33, Reply)

Cheers.
Hapcanday.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:34, Reply)

Thanks!
I'm feeling all of my five years though.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:34, Reply)

I'm enjoying my lithe new 3 month old login.
It's way better than my grumpy nearly eight year old one.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:36, Reply)

Happy Candleday Beegeebee.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:54, Reply)

my gay friend describes lots of women as "camp"
i think he means they would make good faghags.

also the end.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:36, Reply)

What sort of women?
Also, is he good-gay or camp-gay himself?
I need to know to decide if his opinion is worth anything.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:37, Reply)

think janice in "friends"
that kind of thing. leopard print and fake gold.

he is mostly straight acting but can really turn on the campness if required.

he IS ginger though.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:45, Reply)

you still would tho, right?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:46, Reply)

any girl would
he's tall, lean but muscled, good looking, dresses beautifully, smells amazing, funny, clever, nice... of COURSE he's gay.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:48, Reply)

your right, i';m all of these things and i'm totally partial to a bit of sausage

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:50, Reply)

I resent that suggestion
I am at least some of those.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:51, Reply)

i remember going to see the backstreet boys with my gay mate nick
who has the worst gaydar in the world. he asked me how i could tell which guys were gay. of course, 99% of them were, at that particular venue. the gay guys looked to be all that i have described above. then there was the occasional specimen wearing shit ill-fitting jeans, with a bad haircut, yelling something about "fucking pussy" and trying to carry 6 pints of stella in each hand.

i don't think nick had really given any sympathy to what it means to be a woman until that night.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:52, Reply)

Well let's see now
Your criteria:

tall - er, ok not really. 5'11". Probably taller than you though?
lean but muscled - er, bugger. I play plenty of sport and go to the gym once or twice a week. Not bad for a man of my vintage I suppose.
good looking - ok, we'll maybe come back to that
dresses beautifully - oh fuck sake this is getting difficult now
smells amazing - what on earth does that mean?
funny - well, yes - people laugh at me - does that count?
clever - captain of my pub quiz team - is that good enough?
nice - sorry, epic fail.

Conclusion - must try harder.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)

the question marks speak volumes
you are straight.

prosecution rests.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:04, Reply)

Well my GF, ex-wife and thousands of ladies around the world will be delighted to hear that.
Ta.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:07, Reply)

thousands?
really?

nice work. but do get tested, ok bro?!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:08, Reply)

Lolz
I meant thousands of potentials darling, although I do prefer your interpretation.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:13, Reply)

I'm all of those things and I'm actually not gay
Except tall. Lean might be an exaggeration. Good-looking is a matter of opinion. And I smell variable.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:51, Reply)

don't knock it til you try it

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:55, Reply)

Try what, exactly?
Being tall? Smelling nice all the time? Gayness?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)

have a taste of cock, iof you don't like it fair enough but you don't know til you try

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:02, Reply)

I have tried it
I've no problem with it.

You?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:07, Reply)

fucken love it i do

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:17, Reply)

Ooh... yeah that makes sense.
Or Davina McCall. And Fearne Cotton. All affected annoying twatishness.
Yeah. Women can be camp. And camp women are just as head-stamp worthy.
Good; I'm not a homophobe. I was worried for a moment there.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:51, Reply)

i think he would agree with you
you have nailed the phenomenon.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:53, Reply)

Campness is not really a gay thing.
My friend's ex was very camp but was totally straight. He often played the whole camp think up when people thought he was gay. He was a hairdresser too.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:53, Reply)

Good point. I know a straight camp man too.
And I'd stamp on his head given the chance as well.
There's just a MASSIVE overlap of gay and camp on the venn diagram of EVERYONE and CAMPNESS.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:56, Reply)

It is more prevelant in the gay community is all.
What about the commedian who swam the channel. He's always camping it up but has a hot model girlfriend.

Edit - David Walliams.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:59, Reply)

David Walliams loves teh cock
whether he is married or not
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:01, Reply)

He is also not a comedian
by any definition of the term
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:02, Reply)

i think the people's question here is
why do you work with so many pooves, and how exactly did you turn them?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:37, Reply)

By drawing a face sideways on my bellend and manipulating its urethra-mouth to make it look like it was talking.

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:38, Reply)

oh fuck, ,my girlfriend does that oh fuck its horrible, its so wrong to look down and see your little winky looking up at you talking
/traumatic
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:42, Reply)

urethra-mouth urinary meatus
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:43, Reply)

No.
YOU'RE an hairy meatus.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:45, Reply)

Does this mean we can't be friends?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:46, Reply)

It's okay. Your campness doesn't show in text.
We can just never ever meet.
Are you really camp? You don't seem it.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:53, Reply)

Nah, not really
CQ and AA can attest to this. I get accused of being gay a lot IRL mind you, although I'm genuinely not sure why.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:55, Reply)

You take care about your appearance and you do ball room dancing.
It doesn't take much to sway people's opinion.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:56, Reply)

That's what I generally come up with
It annoys me that Ballroom is considered camp. It's really, really not.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:59, Reply)

Let's face it, lycra is a big no no for men unless it's worn for sport.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:01, Reply)

Yeah, but dancing is a sport
The problem is that people don't see the distinction between Latin (which I admit can be very camp) and Ballroom dancing. There's nothing remotely gay about a well-executed Tango.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:04, Reply)

There is though.
Basically, you might as well change your name to Louie Spence.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:12, Reply)

Bitch please
I've got much better hair than him
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:13, Reply)

Plus, he's gay.

( thealternativefact, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:59, Reply)

Haha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:02, Reply)

Is that what does it?
Oh.

*removes cock from anus, sends Julian packing with an apology*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:04, Reply)

+ not only watches Glee, but trumpets about it on Facebook
This does not help. Soz.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:04, Reply)

Most of the trumpeting is about what they've done badly!
Nonetheless, I take your point
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:06, Reply)

Offering a serious critique does not help in any way.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:09, Reply)

Well they were obviously listening to my rants during series 2
How else do you explain the improvement in standard for series 3? Coincidence? Pah!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:16, Reply)

*shakes head, facepalms*

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:18, Reply)

He dances more than I do.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:56, Reply)

Darth is so camp that Anne Robinson bummed him

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:56, Reply)

you got an actual LOL for this.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:57, Reply)

woohoo!
My first upside down one!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)

It was worse than that - I've been sick the last three days.
I lol'd so hard a little bit of snot came out my nose.

How's that for oversharing huh? :D
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:59, Reply)

I love this now
You have made my morning!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:00, Reply)

aha I aim to please.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:01, Reply)

I think he's getting at you Darth.
I'll hold your gold larmee jacket while you throw sequins at him.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:53, Reply)

I can overlook "larmee" because you've no reason to use it normally
But "through"? Really?

EDIT: Ninja bastard
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:57, Reply)

Best of all the Ninjas

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:58, Reply)

Now edit it to llama
All pooves wear llama skin.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:00, Reply)

I thought vicuña would be more gay.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:05, Reply)

Your problem stems from the fact that in many cases 'campness' is wholly affected and false.
It's massively irritating, too. I have always been baffled by the fact that some fellows seem to think that because they have found out they're attracted to men, they have to suddenly start speaking in a stupid bent voice and like shit pop music and musical theatre.

Fair enough if that is your voice - in which case you have my deepest sympathy - but if you're putting it on, fuck off you stupid John Inman bender, and also, die.

I used to work with a chutney who liked decent music and didn't feel the need to mince about being a spastic. He was appalled by the 'gay scene' and I found him to be sound as a pound. Even though he was, you know, one of 'them', and thus cursed by God for all eternity, and that.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:53, Reply)

As if we're not all cursed just a little bit.

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:57, Reply)

Plus, poofters, eh? Errr.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:57, Reply)

I knew a guy like that a poly. Totally blew us away when we found out he was gay and seeing a straight acting guy about 20 years his senior.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:57, Reply)

The chap who sits opposite me in the office is the same.
I didn't know he was a woofter until three months into working with him, when I overheard him talking about a chap he was seeing.
I accidently said "What?! Are you one of those?!"
He saw the funny side.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:59, Reply)

I also like to refer to it as his "disability".

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:09, Reply)

hahahahah
'You poor man. It must dreadful for you, not liking fannies and all that'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:10, Reply)

I asked him once how he gets through without having tits to play with.
He pointed out that he goes for chubby men.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:13, Reply)

I'm going to stay quiet on this subject.
Alt - I've got to go to do this weekend, but I don't. Yet I am a social butterfly and duty calls. What would be your crazeee excuse to get out of it?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 9:59, Reply)

you gotta come outta the closet someday toots

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:01, Reply)

I'm not referring to that really.

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:03, Reply)

"I'm going to stay quiet on this subject" speaks volumes

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:03, Reply)

About?

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:05, Reply)

you being a great big massive shirt lifter

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:06, Reply)

I see.
I'm not really following your train of thought, sorry.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:11, Reply)

Distinct lack of "thought" with this one.

(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:12, Reply)

i'm saying your denial of the subject implies that you bum men

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:17, Reply)

Staying quiet ≠ denial
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:21, Reply)

It's pointless trying to counter Gary with logic, dear boy
You're better off with a gun.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:23, Reply)

oh what that i don;t like it you meanie i been nice today

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:29, Reply)

No, you see, what your'e supposed to do here is go
"I'm not gay, I'm not gay", so that he can develop his denial thing.

You're not playing the game properly.
( Kroney, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:23, Reply)

kroney rhymes with boney
true story
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:29, Reply)

course it does, and your further comments in this thread have only cemented my notion that you are indeed a fairy tea bagger bum queen

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:23, Reply)

That's me in a nutshell actually.

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:27, Reply)

your preoccupation with nuts is whats landed you in this mess to begin with
were you parents accepting of your lifestyle choice or did they disapprove?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:28, Reply)

When I bought the peanut farm
that's when the shit really hit the fan. By fan, I mean my cock.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:31, Reply)

i don't think your parents could live it down could they?
your dad must have felt like he'd failed as a man, and projected his disapointment onto your mother, who turned to the drink in order to cope with the burden

HAVEN'T YOU A CLUE THE TROUBLE YOU'VE CAUSED??
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:32, Reply)

My parents don't know.
They think I'm straight. I keep bringing a faghag home every now and again to keep up pretences.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:33, Reply)

you shouldn't hide your light under a bushel

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:35, Reply)

I apologise for making the same incorrect assumption about your original post.
Soz.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:29, Reply)

You're an expert so why not give an opinion?
Alt: washing your hair?
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:02, Reply)

My expert opinion is that campness is not limited to gays.
Or men for that matter.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:11, Reply)

I can offer you the excuse I'm using for my department do later this month:
"I'm not spending my own time and money on an evening with you people."
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:02, Reply)

stay in bed getting laid

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:04, Reply)

I don't have a bed in Kensington.

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:12, Reply)

you'll have to ask nicely

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:42, Reply)

You truly are a frightful queer, old boy.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:04, Reply)

Only for you Bonters,
you devastating Bot Dog.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:13, Reply)

*sings a Liza Minelli medley whilst tap-dancing*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:17, Reply)

Actually called a Minedley
according to my sources. My sources being my horrifically bent mind.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:31, Reply)

Christ alive.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:34, Reply)

Not for about 2011 years, no

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:38, Reply)

Are you suggesting that he did exist and didn't come back to life?
( thealternativefact, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:40, Reply)

The boy is a fool.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:40, Reply)

And a mong.
And not in a Ricky Gervais way, but in a mong way.
( thealternativefact, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:42, Reply)

1978 ACTUALLY

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:40, Reply)

haha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:43, Reply)

Are you a camp then?
If so, I'd love to hear your side of the story. Fo' real.
How do you feel about other camp people when you meet them?
Do you feel you are "putting it on" when you are being camp? Is it a performance or just you being yourself?
Are you more camp with some people than others?
Sincerly, I'd love to get the other perspective.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:05, Reply)

He's getting a massive gay-on just reading this.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:06, Reply)

A brown on?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:12, Reply)

Tasting the rainbow.

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:14, Reply)

So you're saying: I don't mind gays as long as they're not too poofy?
It's not an overly tolerant approach.
My advice: I wouldn't let it worry you, there are more serious problems in the world.
Live and let live, my friend (unless you encounter Osborne, Cameron or Gove et al - then you have my blessing to stamp on their fat faces.)
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:04, Reply)

why just those 3?
what about brown and blair, who kind of caused this whole mess? can't we stamp on their disgusting slimey lying mushes too?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:05, Reply)

I took them to be part of the "et al".
And, if this is an option, I'm off home to put my boots on.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:08, Reply)

al?
yeah, you can kick him too. i'm happy with that.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:09, Reply)

Al Gore.
Albert Einstein.
Alice Cooper.
I dunno.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:14, Reply)

Yes dear, the global recession was caused by the Labour Party spending money on public services.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 11:15, Reply)

I'd rather spend a night out with Osborne etc than Louis fucking Spence any day of the week.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:05, Reply)

Don't get me wrong, there are loads of people who's faces I'd love to stamp on. Not just camp people.
But I disagree that campness and pooftiness are the same thing.
And camp people are the ones whos company I find the most unbearable. I'd rather be with a preachy religious type or a racist for the evening.
Although I would stamp on their faces too. But I'd bother shouting at them for a bt first.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:07, Reply)

We'll get on fine then. I am an EPIC RACIST.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:09, Reply)

I have a film pitch for you:
Wogs On A Tram.
I only have one bit of script written so far, but it's a doozy.
"I have had it with all these mother fucking wogs on this mother fucking tram."
Not sure if SLJ will be up for it though.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:17, Reply)

It would be a great way of introducing the world to the delights that are Croydon.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:19, Reply)

Terrorists have filled a Croydon tram with people who look a bit different to your average caucasian council estate resident.
Then they put pheromones in the tram's airfreshener which make them all act like the Duke Of Edinburgh imagines they act.
Only one woman can save the tram by shouting profanities incoherently into the back of her toddler.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:27, Reply)

*buys tickets*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:28, Reply)

The non-caucasians would, of course kill the driver in some sort of caniballistic voodoo heathen ceremony.
Then someone who had played tram-simulator computer games would have to land the tram while Samuel L Jackson (whited up) would shoot out the windows to get the stench of foreign food out.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:34, Reply)

....and all is resolved in the closing minutes by a 'dance-off'*
*won by the nig-nogs, obv, due to their 'natural rhythm'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:36, Reply)

"Wogs on a Tram"

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:30, Reply)

Yes.
That is what I said. Yes.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:35, Reply)

I repeated the bit that made me laugh the most
and completely forgot to write "officelol". My mistake.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:36, Reply)

I see.
Fair enough.
Soz.

Can we have a racist woman on a tram film pun thread now?
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:39, Reply)

Fear And Lothing In Las Croydon?
No. Soz. That's rubbish.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:40, Reply)

I'm afraid it is. Soz also.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:43, Reply)

'Donnie Darkie'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:44, Reply)

'Spade-ing Places'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:47, Reply)

Soz.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:49, Reply)

Gunfight At The KKK Corral.
Nope. I'm shit at this. I give in.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:51, Reply)

Meet Smelly Black

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:52, Reply)

Dirty Rotten Samboes.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:53, Reply)

I smell Oscar, here*.




*Oscar is the name of the vagrant who begs outside my office
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:30, Reply)

I hope all the Metro workers striking in Newcastle lose their jobs.
Cost me blooey fifteen quid in a cab to get to the station.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:30, Reply)

Blooey hell.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:32, Reply)

From where? The coast?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:32, Reply)

How the blooey hell do I know?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:33, Reply)

No need for that kind of fooing language pal

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:35, Reply)

Fueue off.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:37, Reply)

Twelve pound something plus tip cos he was sound init.
I always tips nice cab drivers cos I'm not a stereotypical tight student knobhead. We were sat in traffic the entire time, should have walked.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:46, Reply)

Are all Vodafone employees still on your list?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:33, Reply)

I am camp.
Like Les Dawson and Roy Barraclough when they squish their boozums and gossip.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:30, Reply)

Campness and gay don't necessarily go together.
I know quite a few non shirters who sound like John Inman on speed.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:40, Reply)

i disagree with this statement, if you're camp the chances are you're just in the closet
i used to have a guy working for me, really good looking and that, camp as fuck but deeply, deeply in denial, kept trying it on with women and failing to satisfy himself or them.

as far as i'm aware he's still in that closet
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:46, Reply)

used to have a guy working for me am not remotely
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:48, Reply)

your words hurt like bullets made of fire :(

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:53, Reply)

I know a camp fella who made his wife's wedding dress

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:52, Reply)

and in ten years time she'll find him in bed with her brother and his children will be bullied at school for it

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:53, Reply)

GAYDADGAYDADGAYDADGAYDADGAYDAD
they'll say
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:54, Reply)

I can't help but think you're right
Mind you, his wife's dead butch so maybe she's man enough for him
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:55, Reply)

that'll do it then, plus he'll save loads on the old KY

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:55, Reply)

And they don't want kids. They have reptiles.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:56, Reply)

don't we all

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:57, Reply)

Quite.
Here's the situation with campness as I see it:

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:49, Reply)

Well of course it all makes sense now.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:50, Reply)

does it?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 10:54, Reply)