I've had an omelette.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:12, 2 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I've just polished off a lamb moussaka.
Now I'm enjoying expensive port. Trying to work out where everything went right for me.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:14, Reply)

You terrible pederast.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:14, Reply)

I've just had some chicken soup.
I feel better now.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:22, Reply)

Opening a can is quite difficult.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:23, Reply)

Not this kind.
They have ringpulls. Even my fliddy fingers can manage that.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:25, Reply)

Have you ever had Oasis soup?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:26, Reply)

It's got a roll with it.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:26, Reply)

You are both shit.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:27, Reply)

Not as shit as your face.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:28, Reply)

*cries*

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:28, Reply)

Don't.
The shit will start to run.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:29, Reply)

You're mean.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:30, Reply)

Sorry b3th.
I'll buy you a cider.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:31, Reply)

not as shit as Oasis.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:30, Reply)

Or Maroon 5.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:30, Reply)

True.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:30, Reply)

I just remembered they made that borderline rapey song a few years back that went "she wiiiiiiiiiiiiillll be loooooooooooved".
If memory serves, it was popular round about the same time as "I Like The Way You Move", which had an introduction so pervy and heavy-breathing it made you uncomfortable just being in the same room as the radio.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:43, Reply)

So your story is that I'm vicariously rapey?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:53, Reply)

That's the best compliment you are going to get on the Internet today
I'd throw in the towel now, if I were you.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 21:57, Reply)

There does come a point
When obsessive fixation on assumed lookalikes tips over the edge of normality.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 28 Feb 2012, 22:02, Reply)