because i am an idiot
i am helping him move all his stuff in this weekend, for a month (NOT himself). then the remainder of it next weekend. and in a month's time, i get to help him move it all back.

in an effort to be helpful, given where he lives, i used my lawyer charms on the council and got a parking dispensation for the evil double yellows outside his current place. and the response was "thanks but i wish you hadn't agreed to pay them £25, but i will refund you". i didn't ASK for a fucking refund! then he didn't speak to me for 48 hours and has just now emailed to ask if 7am tomorrow morning is still ok.

even i am reaching tipping point now...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 10:48, 4 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Dear christ, that's ridiculous
Tell him to shove his furniture up his arse, the fuckwit.

Delete his number, and don't contact him again. He's clearly a prick.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 10:50, Reply)

i don't know how i get myself into these things
it's the same way i have ended up with all these flatmates not paying me rent for years - my stupid mouth just opens and says "you can stay with me for a bit" - and then they're there for about 2 years!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 10:51, Reply)

There's doing favours for friends, and letting them walk all over you
You need to decide whether you are their friend, or their doormat, because this situation is ridiculous.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 10:52, Reply)

Innit.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 10:58, Reply)

most people are appreciative in which case they are welcome - apart from this ridiculous thing about the parking (maybe he thought i'd overstepped the mark by applying), he is super-grateful
but sometimes you get the odd prick who just assumes you will pay for something and doesn't say thank you; that kind of goat in a barn manners really irritates me.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:00, Reply)

rateful ay
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:03, Reply)

Delete his account and kill him.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 10:58, Reply)

Oh you fucking imbecile.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 10:55, Reply)

i know
i am useless
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:00, Reply)

Get a grip on yourself. Please.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:02, Reply)

it takes a lot to piss me off but i think this has managed it!
er, i mean him, not you, obviously darling x
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:11, Reply)

delete his account and kill him
edit: oh this quality advice has already been given
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:07, Reply)

ha, you and monty get ever more similar

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:10, Reply)

as long as our bank balances stay poles apart

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:13, Reply)

1. Help with moving stuff
2. Smother him in his sleep
3. Spatchcock him and sell his skeleton to a doctor who needs one of those plastic skeleton models in his office
4. ??????
5. WEAR HIS SKIN. For shits and giggles.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:13, Reply)

This answer is the best yet.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:14, Reply)

what's a spatchcock??

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:15, Reply)

Actually, spatchcock is probably the wrong word
It's something you do to a chicken or similarly edible bird so you can cook it without the bones in, but I can't remember whether it refers to the technique of removing the bones, or the actual cooking process.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:16, Reply)

but it's got cock in it
so you thought you'd use it anyway?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:18, Reply)

Yeah, basically.
But you won't be mocking me once you've sold his skeleton!
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:20, Reply)

i'm not sure i'd get that much for it

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:23, Reply)

There'd be one less bone in it than he was used to, after all.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)

hahaha

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:36, Reply)

split and flattened poultry
2.bp.blogspot.com/_yPn45KkKQ-k/SfZwWqX39gI/AAAAAAAACLw/fntfO8ToC0s/s400/DSC_0392+resized.jpg
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:17, Reply)

what a slag

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 9 Mar 2012, 11:18, Reply)