I'm taking the wife up the Oxo tower for our 10th anniversary, lol

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 10:59, 3 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

tracey admitted to not minding anal sex yesterday

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:02, Reply)

She's all class that girl
Where are you based q?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:02, Reply)

just round the corner

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:03, Reply)

I know a girl whose boyfriend "made me do anal".
Made her.

Sounds a bit rapey, to me.
( Kroney, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:03, Reply)

poor kroney - anal rape victim

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:04, Reply)

I'm a boy, not a her :@

( Kroney, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:05, Reply)

You're a 'lui'

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:06, Reply)

I knew a girl whose boyfriend
'accidentally slipped'.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:05, Reply)

Oh, the old changing lanes without indicating trick.
This wasn't that.
( Kroney, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:06, Reply)

I don't get how that can work, either the girl has an anus like an old sock or it is somehow self saucing

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:07, Reply)

Haha "self-saucing" might just be the grimmest thing I've read so far today.
Good work.
( Kroney, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:09, Reply)

What you probably don't understand Ape
is that when a woman is with someone that they actually like, they get quite juicy, and it can run out of one hole and into another, so it's possible.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:09, Reply)

It's true, I've seen it on the Internet

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:10, Reply)

depends which way up she is, I was assuming doggy as I do that most
I hate seeing your mum crying when I'm trying to complete my vinegars
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:13, Reply)

seeing your mum
my vinegars
+ but it doesn't matte how hard I tug it never gets big enough to touch the sides of my wife
(Bazongaloid, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:15, Reply)

Exactly, and thats why I have to do your mum up the shitter

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:18, Reply)

Difficult, what with her wearing a bag over her head an all.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:16, Reply)

P.O.T.D.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:10, Reply)

Pipe On The Dick?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:12, Reply)

Battered uses a piece of 22mm copper pipe.
But he has to wrap his willy in ptfe tape to get any friction inside it.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:13, Reply)

1 1/2 inch poly more like.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:15, Reply)

That's more than long enough

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:19, Reply)

'Piss off, tedious dickhead' I think

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:15, Reply)

I think the point was
he knew where he was going, but told her it was an accident.

Unless I'm being a bit TTJ...
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:19, Reply)

surely she could just punch him the nutsack for being such a prick.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:20, Reply)

sorry about that, b3th

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:07, Reply)

I can imagine your husband is a prime candidate for accidently slipping in the shower and breaking his hip

(Bazongaloid, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:08, Reply)

At his age he's probably uses one of these.
www.practicalbathing.co.uk/walk-in-baths-range/the-scorpio
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:18, Reply)

AKSHUALLY
We have a really nice wet room shower with handrails and shit. He built it when his mum was alive and she was going to live with him, but then she ended up going in a home anyway.
Still, it's quite handy for him now lol.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:20, Reply)

You could tie him to the railings and shower him in cold water till he tells you where his pension book is

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:23, Reply)

Silly Ape.
People don't use pension books any more.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:24, Reply)

Sorry pension "app"

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:26, Reply)

Nice one, Kenneth Williams.

( Kroney, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:02, Reply)

Is that the one on Bourneville Boulevard
at the end of the marmite motorway?
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 19 Sep 2012, 11:03, Reply)