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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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They sit sternly, hands in laps. Facial expressions neutral. A cracker is pulled, a joke told.
"That is factually inaccurate" is the reply.
(, Thu 27 Sep 2012, 11:11, 2 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
the silence is broken by CQ, he tells a bland knock knock joke. the budgie cheeps. father scowls at mother and shakes his head, his large moustache perfectly trimmed. "Why can't you be more serious, like your sister."
(, Thu 27 Sep 2012, 11:13, Reply)
Father reads aloud from the 'deaths' column of the local paper. The family allows themselves a cold and humourless smile, and the annual tradition of watching the treasured VHS of 'weather forecasts of the 1970s' begins again.
(, Thu 27 Sep 2012, 11:22, Reply)
"Tradition dictates the exchange of gifts. You may take one of the whimsical snowglobes from the mantle."
CQ claps excitedly, father scowls and mutters under his breath.
(, Thu 27 Sep 2012, 11:24, Reply)
A thumping on the ceiling as grandmama bangs on the floor of her room with a shoe.
"Stop that racket!" she yells.
(, Thu 27 Sep 2012, 11:27, Reply)
His Wilf-like 'tache quivers with anticipation as he reaches for the whirling orb of aqua-borne flakes, his heart pounding. 'What will it be? A castle, perhaps, or a fairy grotto?' Through the fug of heavy sedatives the last vestiges of his imagination struggle to remain alive.
'No, son. It is a factually accurate model of Coventry, 1971'
(, Thu 27 Sep 2012, 11:30, Reply)
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