Hey Guys,
I've just been to a really dull recruitment event. The candidates had to make a dress out of a bin bag, that was nice.
In fact it was a bit bullshit, and one of the guys i interviewed spent a lot of time slagging off his old manager, that was stupid.
What is the stupidest thing you've heard someone do in an interview situation?

Alt: Fill me in on todays LOLs,

Altalt: look at me like that again and I'll fucking nut you.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 14 May 2013, 15:48, 113 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Alt: None.
Altalt: Actually I was looking at your friend's tits.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 15:50, Reply)

I hear she's a terrible hoor

( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 15:52, Reply)

Spilling out all over the place.
Practically begging for it.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 15:54, Reply)

no lols

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 14 May 2013, 15:52, Reply)

Not one.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 15:53, Reply)

nah, stunner took the piss out of battereds crumbling marriage, that was ok

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 15:54, Reply)

I'm good at interviews and have been offered every job I've ever interviewed for.
alt: few and far between, like gonz's sex life.

altalt: kiss me you fool!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 15:52, Reply)

Where's that CUNT hartley?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 15:59, Reply)

He died.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 15:59, Reply)

\o/

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:00, Reply)

WooOOOOooooooWooooOOOOooooooo

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:21, Reply)

are you celebtrating your own death?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:22, Reply)

yes.......



wait the other one
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:23, Reply)

once had a guy apply for a kitchen job, just turned up in jeans and a shit tshirt
handed us his cv but told us not to look at it too much as he has had had bad bosses before who fired him for reasons that like totally werent his fault man anyway he didnt get an interview plus he stank of piss
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:13, Reply)

what's your business ssg?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:13, Reply)

He's Jamie Oliver

( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:15, Reply)

cunt

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:19, Reply)

Steady on, I didn't say he was Gordon Ramsey

( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:20, Reply)

actually i like Jamie's food even if he is a l,ittle annoying

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:25, Reply)

Yeah, same here.
Which makes him all the more annoying because I'm forced to admit that he annoys me for shallow, spurious reasons, the fucking fat-tongued cunt.
( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:26, Reply)

he's less annoy than when he started

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:26, Reply)

That's because he's on telly less often

( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:27, Reply)

he also recently came out as defending ukip

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:27, Reply)

although from what i understand of offtopic,
that's probably a positive thing here
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:28, Reply)

It's possible you have misunderstood.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:29, Reply)

what i am saying is that you are all a bunch of racists

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:31, Reply)

I understood what you were saying.
Perhaps you misunderstood me when I suggested that you had misunderstood?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:33, Reply)

no i got that clear i just wanted to remind you that actually you are a racist

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:34, Reply)

I don't think I am.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:35, Reply)

they never do

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:37, Reply)

racist

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:54, Reply)

in a kitchen

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:27, Reply)

With a spoon

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:28, Reply)

i love to quenelle things

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:29, Reply)

Reel 2 Reels latest ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:34, Reply)

I'm at home, TOIL is amazing

(PsychoChomp, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:17, Reply)

how about trouble and strife?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:19, Reply)

Windy Pig.
Always starting threads and never participating.

Classic prick behaviour.
( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:22, Reply)

ginger prick at that

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:23, Reply)

It's enough to make me go home.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:24, Reply)

i hope you start work at 8am

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:24, Reply)

Yeah, my boss hopes that too.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:25, Reply)

Rarely happens though.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:25, Reply)

i think we got that from the previous post
but thanks for explaining
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:26, Reply)

Lokesy will come along to clarify in a minute, just in case not everyone understood.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:27, Reply)

model employee right here

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:25, Reply)

I'm paid to do a job, not paid by the hour.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:27, Reply)

as a hippy you should be on peace rate

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:29, Reply)

click

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:34, Reply)

Christ that was a dull meeting you attended.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:34, Reply)

It really fucking was. Market research & customer relationship marketing? In Poland?
I was sat there thinking 'think of the money, think of the money' over & over again.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:35, Reply)

CSA aint cheap

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:39, Reply)

Minimum is 15% of net earnings for the first child.
To be honest, I'll be paying a lot more than that - school fees etc. I have no problem spending whatever is required for Micro, after all, I would be if I was still going to be married. Why should she lose out?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:40, Reply)

Although he did reply to my post.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:24, Reply)

I'm in another meeting.
Soz.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 14 May 2013, 17:10, Reply)

are you interviewing for the generation game?
are you jim davidson?
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:26, Reply)

I've just finished a two hour meeting on ethnographic consumer research & customer lifetime value.
Shoot me now. PLEASE.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:29, Reply)

Sure, I'll be right there.
No takesie backsies
( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:30, Reply)

Fine by me. I'll have had my last meal by the time you get here.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:31, Reply)

I hope it wasn't Polish Fish and Chips again

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:33, Reply)

Not a fucking chance. Steak tonight.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:34, Reply)

I think Nakers has a bag on with me
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1962816
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:36, Reply)

He lives in London and you didn't want to go for drinks with him.
So now he's going to murder you.
( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:37, Reply)

nah, I just hope he's dead

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:38, Reply)

X\
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:39, Reply)

Can you imagine it K
he would have you trapped in a corner showing you slide shows of ethernet cables all night
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:38, Reply)

Pretty sure I could out-bore him on that subject.

( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:43, Reply)

Photo 1 this is the top end and first 10CM's




299 Pics later.... and this is the other end of it
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:45, Reply)

To be honest, I wouldn't want to meet Nakers for a drink either.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:41, Reply)

Don't make me publish your gazzes begging to meet up

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:43, Reply)

i thinkn silence speaks volumes here

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:46, Reply)

Nope, just went for a shit. About my 8th of the day, due to the curry I had last night.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:48, Reply)

so you do want to go for a drink?
i could give you some marriage advice
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:51, Reply)

i thinkn silence speaks volumes here




tee hee
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:54, Reply)

Top stuff, what did you learn?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:38, Reply)

Nothing. I've got a pretty good understanding of both topics, having been doing this stuff for nearly 20 years.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:41, Reply)

what they had no new insight? Was it not specific to the POlish market?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:42, Reply)

We were discussing methodologies to be used. Poland is not the most sophisticated of markets.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:44, Reply)

fair enough

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:45, Reply)

naked lady titties with the company logo on
job done.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:02, Reply)

This is why you work in IT instead of doing something interesting.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:46, Reply)

sick burn

( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:51, Reply)

Bull-necked Slavs. Great lumbering oafs to a man.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:20, Reply)

stunner is a slav?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:23, Reply)

He certainly smells like one

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:27, Reply)

i heard he smells like a yak's sweaty ballsack

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:31, Reply)

now steady on;

But unfair on the old yak balls doncha think?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:35, Reply)

Be fair, Nakers hasn't had to smell him, yet.

( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:42, Reply)

This sounds like a threat

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:46, Reply)

It's a *promise*

( Kroney, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:51, Reply)

>_<
I won't smell it I won't!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:55, Reply)

^^ This ^^
That's why I laugh in my bosses faces when they ask me to go to seminars etc.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 14 May 2013, 16:43, Reply)

you lot have been shit today
you've got shit on your shoes, you shitty-shoed bastards
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:41, Reply)

You've got shit on your face. Oh no, hang on, you haven't. Your face just looks like it has.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:43, Reply)

I ain't been in really that's usually the problem
I've just realised you and b3th are the only females left on here
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:47, Reply)

Evenin' all
I once had a guy try to pass off a photocopy of his driving licence as an original. On later enquiries it turned out he'd been banned for three years.
Alt: I've been learning a little about SAP. It's not funny.
Altalt: Yeah? Bring it on tossbucket!
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Tue 14 May 2013, 17:48, Reply)

Alright

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 14 May 2013, 18:33, Reply)