i was driving lat year around some country roads,
i saw the pheasants stood by the side of the road, so i sowed a little, they sort of turned away from the road, so i thought, ok, cool, they're going back in to the field, and they were fucking bluffing, ran straight out in to the road, hit both. one of them was only wounded, but the car behind finished it off.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:14, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

it makes me v sad
but it is also people's fault. people buy them in their thousands for disgusting pigs to shoot them... then most of them don't even get eaten... apparently 90% of them live less than a year, and most of those get polished off on the road. poor birdies.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:16, Reply)

Yup, those, and peacocks
which are the same, but expensive and noisy to boot.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:16, Reply)

i'd quite like a pet peacock
but they make a fucking racket
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:18, Reply)

They also have very sharp beaks
One of the little fuckers pecked me during a play at Newstead Abbey
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:19, Reply)

i think all birds have sharp beaks
but that's pretty unlucky. like my friend's brother, who got pissed on by a tiger at the zoo, right through the bars. he said he smelled for DAYS.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:22, Reply)

He was on a mission to raid our picnic
they have beaks like ice axes
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:25, Reply)

awwwwwwwwwww
why didn't you just feed him the picnic? i would have done
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:29, Reply)

I made this mistake at Warwick Castle once
I gave one of them one of my Salt and Vinegar Sky Divers and then the cunt wouldn't leave me alone.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:33, Reply)

why would you want him to, though?
i mean, what's cooler than being followed around by a peacock?!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:36, Reply)

Eating a packet of salt and vinegar Sky Divers

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:37, Reply)

haha

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 11 Jul 2013, 14:56, Reply)