Pinch and punch first day of the month, white rabbit, white rabbit no hit back
Morning all, so daft saying & superstitions got any?

Alt: Unlikely turn of events an Ex-US Navy Seal is now living as a woman
www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-23464947
What unlikely things could your fellow b3tans be doing, picture Rory working at nights in the Samaritans call center?

Alt,alt: August clear skies and blue seas, have you got any BIG plans for August?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 7:40, 76 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

I could see Rory doing that.
He could make a game of it and try and steer the early callers down the suicide route.

'Top of the morning'.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 7:51, Reply)

*Jumps around*
Morning Jeffers you on your travels already?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 7:54, Reply)

Not yet.
Busy morning first.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 7:55, Reply)

This is a shit thread. You fucking cunt.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 7:54, Reply)

^^grumpy

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 7:58, Reply)

^^Happy

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:01, Reply)

^^ Sleepy

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:02, Reply)

^^ Sneezy

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:02, Reply)

^^ Dopey

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:03, Reply)

^^ Bashful

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:03, Reply)

^^ Doc

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:03, Reply)

HIIII HOOOOOOOOO!!!

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:09, Reply)

^^ prick

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:10, Reply)

Yawns, yeah whatever goat milker

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:11, Reply)

Morning short arse
It's nice to see you have brought your little ray of sunshine with you
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 7:58, Reply)

Alt: Battered anger management counsellor

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 7:59, Reply)

alt: Monty as chief of the Equal Opportunity Commission.
Bartleby working for Childline

Swipe at Relate

Nakers at PC World "Geek Squad" (or the Apple Store)

Kroney at ACAS
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:07, Reply)

Is everyone dead today?
It's quiet. Almost too quiet.......
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:37, Reply)

It never gets lively till after 9.15am

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:39, Reply)

I see. I can wait. I will wait.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:41, Reply)

My wife was born to an Irish father and a Scottish mother
so she still manages to come out with daft sayings I've never heard of even after 13 years of marriage, like..

I'm not as green as I'm cabbage-looking
well, he/she doesn't lick it off the grass
as odd as a pig from Drogheda

She also can't pass a lone magpie without calling it Mr Magpie and asking after his family. She a do wont buy a red car, something to do with having crashed three of them in the past, the daft bint.

Altalt: Family holiday down in Somerset followed by a second attempt at the Monopoly Pub Crawl in the capital (the last one was scuppered by trying to do a Sisters of Mercy gig on the same day)
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:39, Reply)

Monopoly pub crawl sounds excellent

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:41, Reply)

It'd be bloody expensive if you did it properly
but we're just going to do one pub per street set and do shots of sambuca at all the rest. Should take most of the day then we're going to the Scala nightclub till 6am to get the train back at 6.30.
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:43, Reply)

26 venues...blimey
I once did 17 when a student (in halves of bitter, DIO) but I wouldn't even make it half way round that now.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 8:54, Reply)

I alternate between alcoholic and none alcoholic drinks if I'm going out

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:00, Reply)

^ gay ^

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:01, Reply)

haha
Nahhhh, you get to an age where you realise that it's not all about sinking pints
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:02, Reply)

If I may ask, how old are you hh?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:03, Reply)

42

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:03, Reply)

The thought of having a coke inbetween pints does not appeal at all

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:04, Reply)

coke, however....
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:04, Reply)

Not a big fan of fizzy drinks, but I do begrudge paying the same money for a bottle of water
as I do for a pint though
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:05, Reply)

^^^this times 100
There's no duty on soft drinks, and they're made on a glorified SodaStream on the bar - so they should be way cheaper than beer. Coke is not £8+ a 2 litre bottle anywhere. Blatant profiteering or what?
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:17, Reply)

It’s a bloody liberty, a liberty I tell you

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:21, Reply)

A great way to stop people drinking so much alcohol, too.
not.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:27, Reply)

It takes a while to get around so the drinking is well spaced out
Old Kent Road is a right fucker.
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:01, Reply)

A bargain at £60 though

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:03, Reply)

It's well worth a punt, especially with Whitechapel and some hotels
Nice little earner

/arthurdaley
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:04, Reply)

*nods*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:05, Reply)

No HH it doesn't.
It's the sort of thing wanker medical students do. Or Australians. Dressed in wakki costumes.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:10, Reply)

I hope you managed to watch "13 Assassins" last night?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:11, Reply)

Recorded it but forgot it was on.
Excellent, that's tonight sorted.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:12, Reply)

It's been one of them films I've been meaning to watch for ages but never got round to it

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:15, Reply)

It's a way of seeing around London and drinking
Both of which I like. No costumes, but if you fancy joining us we could dress up as the Red Dwarf 'crew', you could be Kryten if you've got your new haircut sorted out by then.
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:14, Reply)

YESSSSSSS

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:27, Reply)

haddaway and shite
I can picture Al in some kind of advisory role

Alt:
August will be "sorting the garden" month - as I'm skint and its free
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:06, Reply)

Most of the rest finished then?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:09, Reply)

Pretty much
I'm onto the final straight in the house. Doors and such like to paint and a staircase bannister to box back in again
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:11, Reply)

baby dont hurt me...

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:11, Reply)

Indeed this

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:12, Reply)

Alright, I'm on hold it's exciting.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:08, Reply)

???

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:09, Reply)

+Amanda +en

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:12, Reply)

center? where the fuck do you think you are?

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:09, Reply)

At work???
is this a trick question TD?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:10, Reply)

what a fuckin wanker eh

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:11, Reply)

he doesn't even realise he's made a mistake

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:15, Reply)

Yeah, what a prick
Who are we on about?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:18, Reply)

makes you sick dunnit

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:19, Reply)

I dont know about you
But I did do a little bit of a vomit into my mouth when I read that faux pas,
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:25, Reply)

I hurled my entire breakfast all over my monitor bruv

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:28, Reply)

When does the cricket chat start?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:13, Reply)

right now
panesar in, bresnan out, i reckon
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:14, Reply)

I think Tremlett in for Bres, no Panesar, Root as second spin option.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:16, Reply)

i can dig that

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:28, Reply)

Most of those aren't even real words

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:29, Reply)

YOU aren't even real words. POW!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:31, Reply)

YOUR MUM isn'tzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:37, Reply)

10pm tonight.
I shall be far away from this dump and therefore won't get annoyed by all that '35/8 - YESSS' tedium.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:20, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2034501
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:22, Reply)

Yeah, you're righ......hang on.................. 35/8 YESSSSS!!!!!!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:23, Reply)

I always cross the road when I see a black cat,
So I can boot it in to the side of a parked car, horrible things cats. And blacks, they're horrid too.

Alt: B3th working as a breakfast chef.

Altalt: I've mentioned it enough, but big career switcheroo is only 3 weeks away.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:28, Reply)

Is your boozer walking distance from the main station?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:30, Reply)

There's a new, and dare I say it infinitely superior, thread up.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:31, Reply)

Yeah dream on Boycey

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 9:39, Reply)