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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Good day Miss Purple
I read that earlier in the week, basically he was wacking off on a bus & when caught used that as his excuse
(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 12:10,
Reply)
I know
I've been laughing at this for days....not been on here tho....well funny innit!
(
Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 12:19,
Reply)
Who the hell uses shampoo as a lube? That's got to sting the japs eye.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 12:42,
Reply)
Maybe his sacks had dandruff.
Flaky scrotum? Then try Head and Shoulders.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 12:57,
Reply)
take two bottles on to the bus? Not me, I take "Wank and Go"
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:27,
Reply)
Geordie Jay would 'Rinse and Mince'.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:29,
Reply)
Hey, It's tingling!
That means it's working!
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:29,
Reply)
Maybe he was trying to 'add extra volume'
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:34,
Reply)
* something about Pump Up The Jam *
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:18,
Reply)
What a knobcheese.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Sat 7 Sep 2013, 12:53,
Reply)
KC
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 12:54,
Reply)
Uh-Oh, he's in trouble
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 12:55,
Reply)
Nice!
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:21,
Reply)
Monty has a 'name drop' he can share about teen-trouble-singers Shampoo.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:24,
Reply)
That sounds fascinating. Is it?
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:29,
Reply)
Depends. If by fascinating do you mean 'not very interesting at all' then yes. Yes it is.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:31,
Reply)
See! Sarcasm *does* translate through text.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:35,
Reply)
I think we covered this earlier in the week
but you weren't here, so I won't laugh and point at you.
This is exactly the kind of creepy old nutter that ends up sitting next to me. I obviously have that 'I love weird old men' vibe about me.
Seriously, how can they tell????
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:15,
Reply)
The smell.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:21,
Reply)
Because you've got saggy tits.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:32,
Reply)
one simple answer
YOU'RE FEMALE
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:42,
Reply)
Female what?
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:43,
Reply)
Whale.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:00,
Reply)
Tell me about it
I seem to have attracted a nutter at the pub much to the bf's amusement
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Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:56,
Reply)
If his sense of humour is like his brothers I feel sorry for you
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:59,
Reply)
CHUTNEY FERRET
chutney ferret
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:20,
Reply)
PIMP. Mutha fucker. P.I.M.P.
www.classiccarsforsale.co.uk/car-advert/lincoln/continental/1979/212385/Imagine cruising in this. No GJ, not your sort of cruising.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:38,
Reply)
Dread to think who MPG you'd get from that.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:39,
Reply)
Who's MPG?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:54,
Reply)
So, which woman did you sleep with last night? Your poor suffering wife or your floozy?
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:00,
Reply)
Bit nosey aint cha?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:52,
Reply)
I just need to know how much moral outrage I need to espouse.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:06,
Reply)
You seems to be making quite a mountain out of a mole hill TBH
But then again from your perspective every mole hill is a mountain
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:09,
Reply)
Relying on a height comment. Tsk. Shows how unable you are of defending yourself in response to being called up on your behaviour.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:12,
Reply)
mmmmmmm.......so exactly what have I done?
Explain please
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:33,
Reply)
Seriously considered having an affair, been deceitful to your wife about being in touch with an ex and most stupidly of all, telling everyone on the Internet about it
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:06,
Reply)
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2077415
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:08,
Reply)
Gold plate the chrome and I'm in.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:40,
Reply)
When I was in Atlanta for work I saw a brand new RR Phantom in white. Every piece of chrome had be replaced with gold. Door handles, flying spur, wheels, windscreen surround, everything.
Mind you, there is a large hip hop record label based there, so that's probably the source of it.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 13:58,
Reply)
I have seen a black and gold one in London.
I couldn't decide whether it was great or awful.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:02,
Reply)
Looking at that gave me this earworm
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZVANQheoRUw
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:55,
Reply)
I thought you'd be listening to this
m.youtube.com/watch?v=ek2sXJXqvZQ
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:11,
Reply)
haha
Worse thing is I'm supposed to be going to the office she works in on Tuesday :(
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:15,
Reply)
+ to bend her over her desk and take her roughly with no lube.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:17,
Reply)
I feel uncomfortable about the situation as it is
That's not really helping
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:23,
Reply)
Then have nothing to do with her and tell your wife.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:32,
Reply)
You need to back track and look at my original post
I don't mind that people assume the worst on here it's what I expected.
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:35,
Reply)
Link please.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:14,
Reply)
I have still got a headache.
I'm also starving.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:03,
Reply)
that's a little disturbing...
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Poppet some assembly required., Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:07,
Reply)
Nah, it's inspirational.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:14,
Reply)
just in the pub with my kid
They gave her paper and crayons and told her they'd put her picture on the wall.
So what has she drawn? 'My mummy's bottom'
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:26,
Reply)
that's so hot
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:31,
Reply)
The cheek of it!
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:32,
Reply)
ahaha, god I needed that laugh.
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Poppet some assembly required., Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:33,
Reply)
Sup Poppet, aint heard much from you of late.
You back to hitting the books yet?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:57,
Reply)
been hitting the books for the last 4 months. I'm in the last 6 weeks of my whole degree.
I also tutor, nanny and work as a weight loss consultant in a weight loss clinic. Not a lot of free time at the moment.
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Poppet some assembly required., Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:06,
Reply)
Weight loss? You need to talk to most of /OT about that.
Not HH though, he's burning loads of calories having anal sex with his mistress.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:07,
Reply)
Nice to see you posting
Did you get revenge on the Ex yet?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:08,
Reply)
Talking about ex's yet again...
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:09,
Reply)
WOW YOU CAN READ
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:10,
Reply)
Didn't need to. I'm way better off without him in my life.
And I have a feeling most of /ot would freak. there are lots of women there.
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Poppet some assembly required., Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:10,
Reply)
Good for you
you do realise Dozer and Darth aren't really women don't you?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:16,
Reply)
the adam's apple actually gave it away.
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Poppet some assembly required., Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:24,
Reply)
ly women people
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:27,
Reply)
I wonder if they can be arsed to put it up?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 14:58,
Reply)
Big piece of paper then?
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:05,
Reply)
i assume his thing about not being a hardened criminal was on purpose, right?
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:08,
Reply)
*facepalms*
your mind is a sewer Cavy
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:11,
Reply)
i seriously cannot be the first person who read it like that
the words 'semi erect' next to 'hardened'? I thought it was almost too obvious point out
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:13,
Reply)
I like how the whole bus stopped him from Getting Off*
can you imagine the conversation "well I'm not touching him"
*tee hee
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:19,
Reply)
huh huh
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:24,
Reply)
Imagine the conversation...
So how did you get home today?
Err, I, umm, well, if you must know, I came on the bus. I also used public transport for the journey.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:29,
Reply)
yeah, boy *would* I like to be a fly on the wall during that conversation
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:36,
Reply)
I wonder if he lives in a semi
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:12,
Reply)
a recently erected semi?
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:14,
Reply)
I'd imagine so.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:18,
Reply)
With an extension.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:19,
Reply)
fnar
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:24,
Reply)
A bit poor I know. I'm not on it today.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:27,
Reply)
I'm watching Counting Cars.
I blame Battered.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:15,
Reply)
I like Danny the count he's cool
But "Fast & Loud" is even better
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:17,
Reply)
Fine with me. I get blamed for a fuck of a lot worse.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:17,
Reply)
If you hadn't posted that link to the pimp-mobile, I'd have watched
Escape To Victory instead.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:19,
Reply)
Is that the football one with Pele in?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:21,
Reply)
Yep.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:22,
Reply)
It is.
And featuring former Bristol City manager Russell Osman.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:22,
Reply)
Superb motor though.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:22,
Reply)
The Count has just sold a car!
It's all happening over at his workshop.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:24,
Reply)
blame fancy.
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:17,
Reply)
How many are there?
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:18,
Reply)
4
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:19,
Reply)
I was hoping for 5. Never mind.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:23,
Reply)
Jeff can only count to twenty and a half
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:20,
Reply)
Do I go with the 'Classic Car Club' on the Quest channel
Or stick with more Counting Cars?
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:27,
Reply)
I saw that, but am not watching it in case it's about classic cars.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:28,
Reply)
NOT CLICKING THAT
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:29,
Reply)
If you get chance, watch this
dsc.discovery.com/tv-shows/fast-n-loudGas Monkey garage is way better than Counts Customs
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:29,
Reply)
I shall keep my eyes open for it.
It's 'huge-gamble' time for the Count.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:30,
Reply)
They did a Mustang Fastback $60K in the build
then a un-insured driver T-boned it on the test drive
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:38,
Reply)
Ouch.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:40,
Reply)
worth watching, same types of cars, full restorations
and Richard and Aaron are funny to boot
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:43,
Reply)
Aaron Judy
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:46,
Reply)
In that case
funny to boot pissed up most of the time
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:47,
Reply)
it all sounds ghastly
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:29,
Reply)
He has a website
www.countskustoms.com/
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:31,
Reply)
Not clicking that, it might be about classic cars.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:32,
Reply)
It's about CUSTOM classics.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:33,
Reply)
Oh, that's fine then.
and not a bit boring
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:34,
Reply)
Wheeler Dealers is better than either of those.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:07,
Reply)
Bargain hunt is on! YESSSSS'!!!!!!!!
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:44,
Reply)
113/4 YEEESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!
get in there Doc.
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:45,
Reply)
Thrills as the Blues are looking for that illusive third item!
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:47,
Reply)
1880s walking stick holder. A fine choice. This is a CLASSIS episode.
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:51,
Reply)
Actually an umbrella stand.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:53,
Reply)
Mick Belker to the rescue
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:51,
Reply)
#Hill street blues
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:54,
Reply)
Yes, very good dear.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:56,
Reply)
>:(
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:57,
Reply)
Yes, very good dear. LOLOLOLOL YOURN AN GENIUS
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:59,
Reply)
I don't like Bargain Hunt.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:46,
Reply)
Sometimes you realise you have completely the wrong impression of someone.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:48,
Reply)
he aint no Terry Mynott
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:53,
Reply)
More Monet
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:55,
Reply)
Bravo well played
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:56,
Reply)
*bows*
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:58,
Reply)
I might have a beer.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:52,
Reply)
I might have a nap.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:53,
Reply)
I might go down the shop for some biscuits.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:54,
Reply)
What type of biscuits
THIS IS IMPORTANT
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:56,
Reply)
Standard custard cream/ bourbon.
And maybe something special, lemon puff, maybe choc hob nobs.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:57,
Reply)
Get Fox's Golden Crunch Creams if they have them
I bought a packet the other day and went to have one about an hour ago........but my son had eaten them all :(
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:59,
Reply)
Fox's produce some fine biscuits.
Including the brilliant, but exceedingly rare, ginger crinkle crunch.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:01,
Reply)
U NOES DAT
I didn't even realise they still did lemon puff biscuits, damn I WANT A BISCUIT
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:03,
Reply)
Someone mentioned them when I did a BISCUIT CHAT thread last weekend.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:05,
Reply)
ohhhhh man, how did I miss that thread?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:07,
Reply)
*inserts obvious answer about your personal life*
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:08,
Reply)
It were me and I didn't say it very loud.
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edjogs Collared doves are shit., Sat 7 Sep 2013, 17:01,
Reply)
He's compensating through sugar for having a cheating father.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:04,
Reply)
You're like a dog with a bone today.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:06,
Reply)
Everyday.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:07,
Reply)
He's probably drunk again
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:07,
Reply)
I wish.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:08,
Reply)
There's an easy remedy to that.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:09,
Reply)
Bit early in the day for me.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:12,
Reply)
That reminds me I have a commitment for London
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:14,
Reply)
The sun's over the yardarm.
You're good to go!
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:15,
Reply)
wish 'm Pissed
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 16:09,
Reply)
When is Doris back? You two living together yet?
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 7 Sep 2013, 15:54,
Reply)
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