How often do you write stuff down?
My handwriting has suffered terribly, since I'm on a pute so much.
Alt, belt, braces, or both?
Altalt, I may go to bed shortly. I'm tired but stressed, how do you get to crash if you have problems sleeping? Not involving booze.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 21:29, 186 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Alt: braces are for investment bankers and gumbies only.
Altalt: go for a ridiculously fast bike ride on deserted roads to tire myself out.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 21:35, Reply)

Braces don't seem to be around much anymore.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 21:39, Reply)

Depends where you work.
Or not, in your case.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 21:44, Reply)

Why are you stressed?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 21:40, Reply)

Just shit happening.
It'll get sorted, it'll just take time.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 21:43, Reply)

But if you tell us, we can laugh about it.
It might cheer you up.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 21:44, Reply)

Awww, thx luv xx

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 21:46, Reply)

My handwriting is terrible now. I'm reduced to block capitals on anything others may need to read.
Alt: Belt. It's difficult to have a choke wank strung up on the back of a door in elasticated braces.
Altalt: no idea. I'm shit at getting to sleep. The sad truth of it for me is that I only seem to sleep well when there is someone else next to me, which isn't the case anymore. :'-(
*love theme from Romeo and Juliet plays*
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:01, Reply)

Didn't they die in the end? You don't want that.

Also spread out. Embrace all that lovely space with no cunt snoring and farting and stealing the covers
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:13, Reply)

I tried that, but I prefer 'my' side. It's closer to the telly.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:15, Reply)

So put porn on the telly

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:20, Reply)

Properly tailored clothes do not need a belt or braces.
Merely 'side adjusters' like these; d30fnpgn92mkei.cloudfront.net/BS052GRY.jpg
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:07, Reply)

Don't get them on diesel jeans though innit.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:19, Reply)

SHIT THREAD.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:12, Reply)

DIRTY DANCING! YES!!!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:13, Reply)

U WOT

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:18, Reply)

It just started on channel 5
This may be the 200th time I have seen it, but it still has to be watched.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:19, Reply)

I have a similar issue with Zulu.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:27, Reply)

Don't you throw that ruddy spear at me...

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:29, Reply)

Shut up about what you're attempting to do in your flat, whilst you try and keep your ginger locks away from the mirror so you don't get upset whilst you sadly swoon to Magic FM.
You should focus on your stupid pink fridge that 'only has vodka & mineral water in it' (we all know it really contains pies, pasta, fat coke & doughnuts).

When you've done this please kill yourself.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:19, Reply)

One word
Riiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:20, Reply)

Go to bed dad, you're drunk again.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:24, Reply)

No booze for me tonight. Which is dull.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:24, Reply)

Like the rest of you then?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:25, Reply)

You're so horrible to so many people on here, it's hard to tell where your affections lie.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:28, Reply)

I don't have any
I am an aloof unavailable ice queen
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:29, Reply)

No you ain't.
I reckon it's Rory, then Dozer then Battered.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:31, Reply)

Dozer makes me want to vomit
And battered looks like the garden gnomes that my parents' neighbours used to have around their pond
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:34, Reply)

RORY WINS

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:35, Reply)

Oh I forgot about him
And what about you? Where do you lie in the Q?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:36, Reply)

Top obviously you daft mare.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:42, Reply)

Basically if I'm polite
I can't stand you
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:44, Reply)

Sir

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:44, Reply)

Don't lie, I'm ace and you know it.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:46, Reply)

You're alright you are

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:47, Reply)

I'm well aware of that.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:48, Reply)

Fuck fuck iPad. Stop making me press the wrong thing
Confident/arrogant, eh?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:52, Reply)

I am a confident chap, unwarranted yes, probably misguided, but still.
Only when I'm happy though.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:56, Reply)

This is quite sweet

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:01, Reply)

Despite my current online persona, I am usually a happy and nice person.
I'm not nearly as miserable and bitter as I make out. Yet.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:03, Reply)

Neither am I.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:06, Reply)

Oh horsecock motherpussy

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:08, Reply)

I think you're *lovely*

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:08, Reply)

^ gay ^

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:08, Reply)

Jealous.
I think you're *okay*
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:09, Reply)

You love me
It's fine, perfectly normal
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:11, Reply)

Yeah, you're alright.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:14, Reply)

:)))))

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:16, Reply)

The next step, is to not meet him for a drink.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:09, Reply)

That, I can do.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:10, Reply)

The sooner you don't meet Dozer for a drink, the better.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:11, Reply)

I will definitely not meet him anytime.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:13, Reply)

Give it time

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:08, Reply)

She's horrid horrid horrid :'(

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:30, Reply)

She's a terrible bully. You should tell a parent or guardian.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:32, Reply)

Regardless of that, she's fucking ugly.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:33, Reply)

Yeah yeah, like you really think that.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:34, Reply)

Both my parents are dead.
You horrid bully :'(
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:33, Reply)

That's why I said guardian....

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:34, Reply)

My handwriting is awful - but it's better than before the spine surgery (when I had only marginal control over my hands)
Alt: Belt. Braces are for bankers and they're all cunts.
Altalt: I've never had trouble sleeping, regular furious masturbation* is the key to easy deep sleep.

*Masturbation is sex with someone you really love.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:34, Reply)

Quite a lot since I started my new job.
My handwriting is very nice, thank you very much.
Alt: neither, I have a waist and hips.*
AltAlt: warm shower or bath.


*shut up, I have.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:35, Reply)

I have annoyingly good writing
Annoying because I have to handwrite everything for our team at work, things like amending claim forms, which can take forfuckingever
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:35, Reply)

Do the job centre let you sign-on electronically these days?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:39, Reply)

They didn't last year.
They even asked me if I could read and write. Patronising cunts.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:44, Reply)

Ask HH.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:45, Reply)

Speaking of drunken jobless losers, there's some smashing Facebook trolling happening on the Selfridge's page.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 22:52, Reply)

I'm watching Hot Fuzz.
Just in case you were wondering.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:07, Reply)

For the greater good.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:08, Reply)

The Greater Good.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:09, Reply)

I'm watching a fucking shit film called soul srrfer, hERCULES is in it.
(RonSwanson, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:09, Reply)

what, as in my dead hamster?
Are you sure?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:10, Reply)

He said a film, not your poo chute

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:22, Reply)

Alright Bob, how's the new gaff?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:11, Reply)

I'm being bullied up there :'(

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:17, Reply)

If it helps, I'll not arrange to meet you for a pint.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:18, Reply)

That would be wonderful.
Let's not meet at Nation of Shopkeepers any time soon, yeah?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:21, Reply)

Sounds fantastic.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:23, Reply)

I'll go to North Bar on my own as well, yeah?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:24, Reply)

And don't forget to book a table for one at your favourite restaurant.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:26, Reply)

Table for one at Il Paradiso del Cibo please!
DONE!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:28, Reply)

Are you free this weekend? I'd like to not meet you on Saturday if you're not busy.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:22, Reply)

Soz, I'm busy.
I'm too busy not meeting people for pints.

It's my 'ting' innit.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:22, Reply)

Fair enough, maybe not another time?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:23, Reply)

How about 'never'?
That good for you? I'll not pay for lunch either.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:24, Reply)

Suits me. Lets never meet up soon.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:27, Reply)

Done.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:28, Reply)

G'night knobs.
Get fucked.
\o/
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:31, Reply)

Get fucked.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:33, Reply)

\o/

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 16 Sep 2013, 23:34, Reply)