crocodiles haven't evolved for millions of years, because they haven't needed to - they are already the perfect murder machine
imagine if they had opposable thumbs. the cunts would rule the world.

probably a penguin or parrot.

alt: work, gym. that IS more depressing than the day :(
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:12, 3 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

I saw an article this week where some bloke woke up with a crocodile under his bed,
except he didn't realise it was there and sat on the edge of the bed for a few minutes while he woke up properly.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:14, Reply)

dear god
that makes me feel cold
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:15, Reply)

He didn't get chomped or anything.
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2423311/Man-40-finds-8ft-crocodile-hidden-bed-spent-entire-night-just-inches-slept.html

I was in the Florida everglades a few years ago on a fly drive. Parked the car up to go and have a walk along a raised boardwalk that had been recommended - went into the middle of a swamp. Came back to the car to find a six-foot alligator sunning itself next to the passenger side. Nearly shat myself.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:19, Reply)

they are nowhere near as aggressive
but still fucking frightening. i got eyed by a 4 year old baby on one of those really low air boat things. it freaked me out; it was definitely eyeing me up. eventually the guide banged on the boat, and it balefully swam off... you're only about an inch above the water on those things!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:27, Reply)

nonce

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:28, Reply)

lolz

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:49, Reply)

I read a fantastic story recently
May not be fantastic if you have testicles
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:25, Reply)

I love how their mouths work like venus fly traps.
It's not even a reflex, it's a motor action.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:19, Reply)

We'd have to clone Steve Irwin and reclaim the land.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:21, Reply)

So long as sting rays dont grow legs

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:25, Reply)

I like this

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Sep 2013, 19:27, Reply)