I'm going to Berlin and Krakow in August.
I'm going with my wife and her attractive girl friend, so I'm going to get them drunk and try to have a threesome.

I'm also exhibiting some of my photographic work at the end of next month, so I'm preparing for that. Did you hear that? Yes - that was the sound of me plugging my work. Gaz for details, or simply call me a cunt.

Altalt: I got upset here once, then I got over it because it's the internet. Now everyone calls me unfunny and I laugh, and laugh, and laugh. And then cry.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:05, 4 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

You're about as funny as Tim Vine going through chemotherapy.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:07, Reply)

Oh Dozer! You're going soft in your old age!

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:10, Reply)

Poor "Mrs Dozer" :(

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:11, Reply)

There is no "Mrs Dozer".
Only Zuul.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:15, Reply)

haha!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:15, Reply)

I like you, Vag

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:08, Reply)

I like you too, sportscow.
Let's make love and listen to death from above.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:11, Reply)

Yes, lets

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:12, Reply)

he's losing his edge

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:15, Reply)

Just because he chose me, don't get moody

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:18, Reply)

Only because you're easy SPORTSLAG

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:19, Reply)

TGGI^

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:20, Reply)

Alright 'Bono's solo album'.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:19, Reply)

listening to 'Death From Above' means DFA Records.
DFA's most famous act is LCD Soundsystem.

LCD's first single was 'Losing My Edge'.

Hence the gag.

Alright.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:23, Reply)

Fucking hell.
You absolute virgin.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:26, Reply)

yeah, LCD and DFA are really obscure, aren't they?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:26, Reply)

No, but the nerdy convulsion of that joke is just ... mind-blowing.
I like you Dozer, but you're going to have to take that on the chin.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:29, Reply)

convolution

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:45, Reply)

Hahahaha
Cunt.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:58, Reply)

I KNOW OF A CERTAIN MRS DOZER THAT WOULD DISAGREE

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:29, Reply)

I thought it was a reference to the band Death From Above 1979

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:26, Reply)

I thought DFA records

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:27, Reply)

I thought your a gay

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:28, Reply)

I had the single of that.
I think it was on an eight inch record.
IMAGINE THAT!!!
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:18, Reply)

woah

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:19, Reply)

What's an eight?

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:19, Reply)

It's the number between seven and nine

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:21, Reply)

Its what seven did to nine

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:21, Reply)

\o/

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:23, Reply)

CSS were alright

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:26, Reply)

I don't really remember

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:26, Reply)

That will take your breath away...

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:11, Reply)

LTI

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:12, Reply)

You kids and your acronyms

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:14, Reply)

^TGGI

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:15, Reply)

ROFLCHOPTER

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:17, Reply)

Best of all the scary kids' toys.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:18, Reply)

Can you tell what it is yet?

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:21, Reply)

Both cities are really sexy and romantic.
By which I mean they're both concrete ex-Commie holes. Half of Berlin's alright, I guess. Still reminds me of Woking, though.
( Kroney, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:11, Reply)

I'm developing a bit of a like for ex-Commie hellholes.
I'm quite liking brutalism an ting innit.

I've got to write 200 words about my stuff for the show, and I'm trying to work in 'a witty juxtaposition of irono-modern uber-kitsch within an assumed post-minimalist framework' or similar for lols.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:18, Reply)

the key is either go for obscure meaningless words
or be awkward. I just went for one sentence which had very little to do with it
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 25 Feb 2014, 13:20, Reply)