I just had a massive shit.
It made my fucking eyes water.

Mind you, I have just ploughed through stewed cheese, chump chop, bubble, mushrooms and spinach. Washed down with two glasses of red and 4 pints.

I love the City.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:35, 1 reply, 12 years ago)

I had one this morning that felt like a wild animal was trying to claw its way out.

( Kroney, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:37, Reply)

I had to keep "snipping" to get it all out.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:38, Reply)

Worst one felt like a nail studded bowling ball.
It was agony. When it was over I nearly cried out of sheer relief.
( Kroney, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:39, Reply)

I normally take a photo when I do something like that.
I like the ones that are almost constipation on the first heave, then 10 litres of hot runny shit.

Just demonstrates what an instrument the human body is.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:41, Reply)

^ top internet conversation ^

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:44, Reply)

Well. You wouldn't do it IRL.
What's your favourite poo?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:46, Reply)

I liked the one where he got his hand stuck in the hunny pot

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:47, Reply)

I like the one where he went for the full tongue swallow in Iceland.
Flids go to Iceland.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:48, Reply)

A loose stool broken up with pockets of gas.
Creating, upon evacuation, a machine gun sound effect.
( Kroney, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:48, Reply)

Like the lid taken off a box of racing pigeons.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:49, Reply)

Oh do fuck off.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:49, Reply)

And mine was better.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:50, Reply)

Brevity is the soul of wit.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:53, Reply)

cu

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:54, Reply)

f

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:59, Reply)

 
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 16:02, Reply)

Like releasing a flock of pigeons

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:49, Reply)

A nice splattery post curry one, where you can still smell the spices.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:52, Reply)

Nice. With a certain amount of chilli ring sting?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:53, Reply)

Of course.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:58, Reply)

Ah, the type containing a month's worth of pain in a split second explosion.
Barely having time to scream, you settle for whimpering as your ringer settles into a dull aching sting.
( Kroney, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:54, Reply)

where you find yourself actually doing that knuckle biting thing you'd previously only seen in films

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:58, Reply)

I like to call it "The Shartgun"

( Kroney, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 15:59, Reply)

By coincidence this is the finishing move your missus asks from me
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 16:24, Reply)

don't think that makes you special

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 16:48, Reply)

Well its a killer move
so I am not surprised
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 16:50, Reply)

pffft, you'd be lucky.

( Kroney, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 16:57, Reply)

Thanks Kylie

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 1 Apr 2014, 17:07, Reply)