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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Now on b3ta, it's time for the evening shift
because Newsround, Blue Peter and Neighbours just don't cut it any more.

Come in here instead and we can talk about boobies, beards and other things beginning with B. Can you think of any?


(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:12, 105 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
Balls
and bears

Bears with balls


*lowers tone*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:15, Reply)
Ooooh, I like B words!
There's bollocks and botany, bottoms or bums....

And I'm cooking chicken BREASTS for dinner :o)
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:15, Reply)
bears with big baggy bollocksacks
*lowers tone even more*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:17, Reply)
Bears with big baggy bollocksacks
buggering eachother in the bum on a bed with their big bear bell-ends!

*goes lower than whaleshit*

BTW, hello HLT! Hello WeeWitch!

*waves*

Is it too early for a glass of wine?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:22, Reply)
Butterflies
*highers tone*




I've just put my pizza in the oven. I bought one of those new fangled square pizzas for a hoot. I've just realised my plates are round.

Silly Miss Blouse!
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:22, Reply)
bears with big baggy bollocksacks
and breasts. Big baggy breasts

*how low can we go*

*remembers manners*

Hello, Miss Tulip, Miss Blouse and Miss Tourettes

Edit: Tourettes, never too early. Wine o'clock where I am - pass the bottle
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:23, Reply)
bastard bear-buggering beavers
banging their balls as they bum baby bats with bananas
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:29, Reply)
If I disappear without warning
it's not because I'm being rude ... honest.

My interweb is playing up and keeps crashing. Time to phone Virgin and make rude noises methinks.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:37, Reply)
Burly brutal bison
with a ball-busting bone-on brusquely buggering a baboon up the bum in Borneo!

*passes WeeWitch a glass of Badger's Creek*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:38, Reply)
barely legal
*FWAPS*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:40, Reply)
Burberry clad bastards with bobble hats
Banging brassy bints with bulbous breasts and ........boke!


I think I made myself sick up a bit!


Edit - crisis over....my pizza fits on my plate. Phew!
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:41, Reply)
HA
bootylicious big breasted beauties bouncing up and down
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:42, Reply)
Ning all!
Read my story! It's down there! (Thread below!)

As for B words:

Bra, baps, boulangerie, bangra, bally, bully, bee-bop and BLARNEY!

Wahey! Masterchef!
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:46, Reply)
*accepts glass of wine from Tourettes*
*sips decorously*

bugger that

*chucks the whole lot down in one*

Big beefy brawlers battling bouncers to bugger bisexual bowlers.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:47, Reply)
???
Masterchef doesn't begin with a B.

I swear on the holy bible that square pizzas taste better than round ones.

I wonder why?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:47, Reply)
It does...
It's just a silent 'B'! :)
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:50, Reply)
what, "bastardchef"?
I would love to see that!

Read and replied, o tighted one!
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:53, Reply)
^ just read your latest chapter Mr Tightly
Splendid, like it's precedents!

Brenda's bleeding blit bokes black pudding!
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:57, Reply)
I'm back, boys and... birls!
Evelyn folks! I had a great weekend meeting lovely people, getting gently mashed and staying in control. I must be a new man!

How are we all?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 18:58, Reply)
Buggeration
I love that word.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:02, Reply)
BGB
homemade weird-shaped pizza tastes best of all!

I have a fun evening of tile cleaning ahead of me. joy of joys!

might be back later to post my bathroom woes....

Edit: *notices B stories....points out that Bathroom begins with aforementioned letter*

*mops brow*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:02, Reply)
Blowjobs
Don't think I've ever used that as a reply title before!

Evening all.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:04, Reply)
@WeeWitch
Did you manage to unblock your drain?

I loathe spending a stack of money on some product that I am just going to pour down the drain. Honestly, Soda Crystals work wonders.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:05, Reply)
Evening all
not long back from Leeds... about 4 hours of commuting for less than an hour's 'work'. And I had beer in between waiting for connections (on the way back, cause that wouldn't be professional).

Beery belches - behold the bestriding beer-sodden behemoth that is me!

Actually I've only had two pints, one in Leeds and one in Newcastle - that's hardly beer-sodden
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:12, Reply)
Bastard bear-bum-buggering big baggy blowjob-bleeding bollocksacks
One of the companies I applied for has rejected me. Didn't even make it to the second-interview stage. Still got two other interviews to hear from, but this was the job I wanted the most out of the three.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:13, Reply)
@MrsL, WeeWitch
I have to admit to having used some caustic soda that I, er, found lying around the lab to clean drains once. I'm sure it was in the 'chemicals for disposal' pile though, so that's OK.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:14, Reply)
*big hugs for spakkaman*
Never mind love....onwards and upwards : )
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:15, Reply)
Cockends
Spakka.

Did they give you feedback on your interview?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:15, Reply)
Badger Badger Badger
Hello all *waves and hugs and hobnobs*

*is very cheerful this fine evening*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:19, Reply)
.
@BGB:
Aw thanks.

* gives monster hug back *

At least one of the other companies is working on a more high-profile project, but I expect I may end up being more stressed, but on the plus side, this might just mean I get paid more than I would have been at the other place. But still, I would have preferred the more laid-back place.

@Mrs L:
Didn't get any feedback. However, they did say they were impressed with the standard of my work. Not sure if that's just the standard feel-good snippet they stick on their rejection-letters.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:24, Reply)
Blady Brilliant!
Why so cheery, TGB?

Blimey, breeding beautiful bangers bites brilliantly!
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:25, Reply)
Bloody big boomerangs
Having chinese tonight before heading down the pub for a farewell session in honour of a friend who is going to Russia for 4 months in the next few days. That means I'll be consuming...beer*

*this is a lie. I'll be drinking cider.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:26, Reply)
bling
aw spakka

*sends cake of condolence*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:29, Reply)
Just cheery :)
just because :)
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:30, Reply)
* badgers Badger *
Care to send me some of your cheerfulness?

@HLT:
Aw thanks!

* slowly nibbles the Cake of Condolence *
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:32, Reply)
bloody punters
do i LOOK that stupid?

do I LOOK as though I'm going to let you in without a ticket?

well? Do I?

Grrr.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:33, Reply)
*gives spakka a huuuuge cuddly badger hug*
I've been told I am very huggable :) I am sure it has nothing at all to do with my "lady pillows"....

:)
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:35, Reply)
^ ^
My, those are very huggable pillows...

... hey, careful - I haven't finished the Cake of Condolence yet.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:37, Reply)
Haha
Lady Pillows FTW!

*surrounds self*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:38, Reply)
I don't envy you, HLT
Working with the public can't be fun.

@spakka - commiserations. Better luck next time.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:38, Reply)
phew, they've all gone upstairs.
the punters that is. not the lady pillows. those are still in front.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:40, Reply)
Right I am off to play Mario Kart
See you all later :)

*goodbye hugs for all*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:44, Reply)
I like
all this talk of lady pillows.

Makes a change from beards. And LPs are much more interesting.

Edit - Bye TGB. Come back (with your pillows) to see us soon.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:44, Reply)
Are they?
But why? Why do you chaps find them so fascinating?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:45, Reply)
See ya TGB
Thanks for the hugs and lady-pillows.

@HLT:
Aren't lady-pillows meant to be upsatirs?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:46, Reply)
I don't know
My rational mind says that they're just fleshy/fatty lumps with pink bits on the centre which wobble up and down on the front of a woman.

But then my male mind takes over and they become objects of endless fascination. One never tires of even looking, let alone playing with them.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:47, Reply)
@K2K6
Lady pillows are appealing to people of all sexual persuasions.


They are the tie that binds us all together in peace and harmony and squishy delights.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:47, Reply)
erm, strictly speaking, yes, but when I said "upstairs"
I meant "upstairs" as in "in the theatre and out of my way" which wouldn't be practical or pleasant in the case of my lady pillows.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:48, Reply)
You'll not be happy
when they start going downstairs.

The punters, I mean, as you'll have to put up with them again.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:54, Reply)
Without lady-pilows
there would be no ladies.

@HLT: If your lady-pillows really were able to go to the theatre, you could attatch a periscope and use them to spy on things. Using them to look at things would make a refreshing change from having them looked at.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:55, Reply)
pfft, k2k6
you can do better than that.

*folds arms*

edit@ spakka - i think they would be looked at MORE if I could do that with them. you know, by doctors and other sciency types, as opposed to old tweed-clad men looking down my top when I sell them tickets*.




*although, I have noticed it makes them easy to persuade to buy more.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:55, Reply)
Yes
I believe I possibly could, normally. But all the breast talk has deactivated the thinking bits of my brain and left me with minimal capacity for clever wit.

In order to recover, I'm going to do the blokey thing and watch Fifth Gear for the next hour.

Back later!
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 19:57, Reply)
cyal8rk2k6
@HLT:
Then they could surge forth through the crowd of men in tweed jackets and head straight to the men in white coats without you having to move.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 20:02, Reply)
As much as it pains me to leave the talk of lady pillows behind
I'm going to the pub.

Mind fart: Would lady pillows be more/less attractive if they had beards?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 20:12, Reply)
hang on
I don't want them to go to the men in white coats. or the ones in tweed jackets.

@Vrothdar - ewwwwww!
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 20:14, Reply)
hmm
where is everyone?


*tumbleweed*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 20:30, Reply)
I'm here
Thinking about assembly themes for the new term.

Ideas welcome - keep it clean, haha...
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 20:32, Reply)
best not to use
any of the "B" words we've mentioned on this thread though.

apart from "bananas", maybe.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 20:35, Reply)
I'm sort of here
Am working on my write-up of last week's bash. Am also supposed to be writing my entry for this week's QOTW (it's epic!).

@HLT: But not if we mention it in the context of other B words that have been mentioned.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 20:45, Reply)
I've now had my petrol fix
Fifth Gear is finished. So I'm back to talk about boobies again.

Oh, have we moved on?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 20:56, Reply)
not really
they're still here
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:02, Reply)
Oh good
I was beginning to worry there would be no breasticles around to discuss.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:07, Reply)
oh
I've just counted all the money. I feel like the king in that rhyme.

I bet he hasn't got breasticles.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:18, Reply)
But
I'll bet his missus has a fair old pair - what with all that bread and honey she eats!

Good takings tonight, Tulip?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:22, Reply)
mmm bread and honey
although am not sure that cup size is directly related to the amount of bread and honey one noms during puberty. I certainly don't remember eating that much, anyway...

Takings, meh, the usual.

Was Fifth Gear good? I can't watch it, it would be like being unfaithful to James May.

*crushes, weirdly*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:24, Reply)
Brilliant buckfast bevelled bees!
How are we all this fine evening? Nearly get to go home now HLT, be happy!!
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:34, Reply)
Was the queen going through puberty?
Don't remember that in the rhyme!

Fifth Gear was good, yes. Except for the bloody adverts.

James May, eh? How odd. Most lasses fancy Richard Hammond.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:34, Reply)
Evening PoD
How's your day been?

And did you enjoy your trip to Aberdeen or whichever ghastly grey norther-than-north place you went to this weekend?

Hamster? Nah, he's too cute, I just want to put him in my pocket. Captain Slow ftw. And I bet he's a dirty dirty boy as well.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:38, Reply)
My day
Has been good my dear Tulip. And my weekend was good, lovely and relaxing, great food, and the ceilidh wasn't even that long, so it's easy money.

And today I have been off work, and not really done that much. I bought a microwave earlier, but that's about it. Good stuff.

Only 3 days of work left now, and a work night out tomorrow! Good stuff.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:41, Reply)
Evening, PoD
How's it going?

Edit - Just read the above!

HLT - You know that Tom Ford bloke on Fifth Gear? The scruffy one with the beard and the hair? That's how I always imagine Vipros to look, even though I've seen his photo and he doesn't.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:41, Reply)
No, but *googles*
Oh yeah!


edit@ PoD - that sounds like a lully weekend!
you lucky penguin you.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:43, Reply)
hmm, you were right PoD
it IS time for me to go. Yay.

*snogs all round*

*snogs k2k6 cos it's monday and he'll be cross if I don't*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:46, Reply)
@PoD
I do like it when the dancing is frantic, the music enjoyed and the night doesn't drag on for 5 hours. Although I'd rather play a 5 hour gig which was going well than a one hour one at which no-one danced.

That's just soul destroying!

*has been there*

Edit@HLT Goodnight, tulipaceous one.

*snogs back, with extras*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:46, Reply)
It was indeed lully
It was the last of the 9 weddings that I have played at this summer, and it was good.

I know who you are talking about k2k6, and I kind of thought the same thing in the past.

edits - I've been there too. It was horrific.
edit mkll - Night Miss Tulip, have a nice night.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:46, Reply)
what are these extras of which you speak?
I really am going now. Honest.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:48, Reply)
no really I am
see?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:49, Reply)
Oh,
just some strategically placed tongue-age and roving hands.

You know the kind of thing....

:)
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:49, Reply)
I do, indeed
*imagines*

right, that's it, I am DEFINITELY going now.

byebye.

*leaves*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:50, Reply)
bning bnings everyone
I'm in a surprisingly good mood this evening. Could have something to do with the fact that I no longer have to rely on the weather forecast to determine if I have to get up two hours earlier than usual as I'm not rabbit sitting anymore. It WAS nice for the most part hanging out with teh fluff, especially on weekends as I got a lot of studying done while the sun shone, but I'm glad I can do what I like on weekends and evenings again now.

I saw something very bad and wrong today that would horrify many...my first thought was where's my camera so I can post it on b3ta under a pseudonym? Luckily for you I forgot my camera today ,) Can't say what it was for data protection and all that, but *shudders a bit remembering*

So how is everyone?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:52, Reply)
Its getting close
to my bedtime too.

Once I'm finished doing what I'm doing on the computer, I'll call it a night, I think.

Edit - 'ning, Becky
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:53, Reply)
Evening becks
I'm good, and am now just pottering about on the interwebs. It's nice.

I was just thinking to myself "I've not seen becky in a while", then I reloaded and you were here! Woot.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 21:55, Reply)
I'm outa here
Goodnight all. Bedtime for me.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 22:05, Reply)
Evenin' beckx
It seems that everyone is cheerful when I've had a bit of misfortune (see earlier in this thread). Anyway, I'm glad that you're now free on evenings and weekends.

EDIT: goodnight k2k6
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 22:05, Reply)
Night K2k6
Ning PoD :)

Sorry Spakka. Well the other one sounded good if that helps - the one not in the middle of nowhere
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 22:10, Reply)
Sucks a bit spakka
Hope you get one of the other two.

Glad to hear you are well beckx. I'm currently looking forward to finishing work soon, and getting back to uni.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 22:12, Reply)
@beckx
The other one on London is at a more interesting place where I get to work on a more interesting project, but I suspect it's more likely to lead to pre-mature burn-out because they kept mentioning overtime on the application form. On the plus side, one of the people I was interviewing with personally knows one of my referees so that may go over well.

As for the one in the middle of nowhere, it really does seem a bit too far in the middle of nowhere. I need to take two busses just to get to Oxford.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 22:19, Reply)
Surely overtime is optional though
and you have the choice to say no to x amount of days of overtime? And if not then Oxford is very pretty. I used to live pretty close to it and would go for day trips from time to time.

PoD, I'm jealous of your 3 days of work left :)
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 22:58, Reply)
I imagine many people are becks
But it also means I stop making money fairly soon, which isn't good considering the amount of things I want to buy.

I do look forward to two whole weeks off before uni though, and a possible trip to arran for a few days :)
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:04, Reply)
You're going to visit a sheep?
Or is it something completely different?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:17, Reply)
It's an island
Just off the West coast of Scotland, but in a kind of huge alcove bit. Google maps it. It's awesome.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:18, Reply)
@beckx re overtime
One thing that company did say is that if I did work lots of overtime, they'd make up for it by giving extra days off once the deadlines have passed. In my industry, overtime is quite common. I've heard horror-stories from people at other companies and even people at companies I've worked for, but somehow, I've managed to avoid excessive overtime so far. Needless to say, I'm glad I don't work in the USA with it's almost non-existent labour-laws.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:20, Reply)
I'm back!
What have I missed?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:27, Reply)
@POD re: Arran
I've never been there myself. Did visit the Outer Hebrides and Skye last year.

EDIT: @TGB: Not much. Am only half on here myself.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:27, Reply)
Hi TGB
I missed out on Badger hugs earlier. Busy evening?

Our fiddler is from skye, never made it up to visit him yet.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:32, Reply)
Yeah I should go to bed
But my brain hasn't powered down enough yet

*badger hugs for PoD*
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:33, Reply)
I hate when my brain won't power down
*hugses back*

For anyone who has followed the woes of my wrist in the past, I think it has once again taken a turn for the worse. Crap.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:36, Reply)
Google maps doesn't seem to like it too much
it wont zoom in properly. Tis verreh green looking though :)

Spakka, I sympathise with the overtime as I've been working 14 hour days the last few weeks and pretty much collapsed last week. I have however accrued a lot of time back though, some of which I'm taking back on Wednesday :) I'd call them and ask how often you'd be doing overtime (on average) and then make a decision from there if they offer you the job.

Ning Badger, I'm pondering going to bed

Edit: No I'm not, E17 reunited is on E4. Hahahaha, I remember they used to park up at the top of the road of my school and pick up school girls at the height of their fame.
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:36, Reply)
Hey Becky
It is a lot later than I thought. I may just have *one* more cider...

Edit: hehe the east 17 thing is hilarious!
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:37, Reply)
No harm in one more
so long as it's not cheap nasty cider. *is pear cider snob and refuses to drink any old shit, no matter how poor I am*

Sorry your wrist has gone shit again PoD. Did you have physio on it? Brain has gone dead again
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:43, Reply)
liek Kopperberg? I can drink that alll day long :)
I am, however, drinking strongbow now. Because I am poor :D
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:44, Reply)
Nope, no physio
As the nhs waiting list down here is months long, and private is too expensive for me to afford really. At least it gets a rest from ceilidhs now, although I do have my drumkit back, which won't be good for it.

Think I might head off. I'm getting tired, and I actually have to work tomorrow. And I have an itchy leg.

*hugs all*

'night all.

edit - what do you do as a job TGB? A grammar checker?
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:45, Reply)
*goodnight hugs*
And not a grammar checker ;)

Sold my soul to H&S instead!
(, Mon 1 Sep 2008, 23:53, Reply)
'night POD
@beckx: If I ask them, they're bound to give a misleading answer. The only answer is to secretly find someone who works there and ask them. But if that's the only job offer I get, I'm going to take it anyway and hope I don't get too burned out.

@TGB: Be glad you're not poor enough to drink Merrydown Cider.
(, Tue 2 Sep 2008, 0:05, Reply)
Kopperberg only
as all the other pear ciders are shit. My ex flatmate gets sponsorship from Kopperberg, so I need to pay him a visit soon as I'm missing the sweet sweet nectar :)

PoD, get yourself on the waiting list. It's worth it as your wrist will only continue to get worse otherwise. Even if you only do the exercises they give you a couple of times a day then it'll help. *passes cake for the meantime*

I'm off to bed, night all x

Edit: True Spakka, but if they guarantee TOIL then it might not be so bad if you have all the time off to look forward to once the major projects are done. Best of luck for getting a job anyway.
(, Tue 2 Sep 2008, 0:07, Reply)
'night beckx.
Thanks. True that. Just hope it works that way.
(, Tue 2 Sep 2008, 0:15, Reply)

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