Today’s upset forecast:

A warm front of upset is sweeping in from the Baggenfock sea bringing heavy downpours of bloo-bloo and a consistent and irritating wind on which can be heard the cries of children. This will continue all day and into the weekend, so grab those upset umbrellas.

In the South East there were dramatic scenes last night as an upset tornado touched down in Kilburn bringing with it scatological gay porn, Patron, wanking and domestic violence. Headhunters are currently on the scene assessing the damage, early reports suggest that they doubt any employment will be forthcoming. Conditions will remain unsettled as another upset depression sweeps in from the continent ruining any £100k weddings planned for the weekend
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 10:44, 80 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

baggenfock fucks kids

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 10:52, Reply)

Is there really a conversation about fuel prices going on in that last thread?
#neweranddeeperlows
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 10:55, Reply)

LOL can't afford a car

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 10:57, Reply)

He's got a cool new RED CAR you stupid beggenfock

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 10:58, Reply)

It got pooed on last night :(

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:02, Reply)

what have you got?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:03, Reply)

5.9.83.79/questions/offtopic/post2383025
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:10, Reply)

make, model and year please

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:10, Reply)

1998 Nissan Micra

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:11, Reply)

I'm going Citroen Xsara Picasso

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:14, Reply)

snap! that's what i was thinking
kiss me you fool!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:18, Reply)

A red car, do pay attention.

(Mr Udagawa, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:10, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4drNFXd6dw
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:11, Reply)

Your neighbours hate you.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:05, Reply)

Wouldn't you
The constant twang of his sitar an the lowing of yaks would keep you up all night. And we haven't even mentioned the smell
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:09, Reply)

I'd love a sitar

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:10, Reply)

i know tangles...I know

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:10, Reply)

SHITar more like hahahaha

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:12, Reply)

One of the Hawkwinders last night had a Keytar
How cool is that!
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:14, Reply)

i left a wedding once because the band brought out a keytar
i knew ta that point it was going to be uber shit
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:15, Reply)

Keytars rule.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:15, Reply)

no.

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:20, Reply)

yes
no returns
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:23, Reply)

What's WRONG with you?!

( Kroney, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:13, Reply)

says the man planning on spending his friday evening in his pants playing computer games

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:14, Reply)

Saturday night's our night out night.

( Kroney, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:18, Reply)

half price voucher for Bella Pasat and a some ten pin bowling?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:20, Reply)

NO CAR CHAT

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:21, Reply)

Is a Bella Pasat
a salon for fat queers?
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:22, Reply)

Belgo, not Bella. But close!

( Kroney, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:25, Reply)

Or a tambura

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:19, Reply)

#FreeChunkyTumbler
With every six quid spent
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 10:58, Reply)

Swipe outside the Cheese?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 10:58, Reply)

I've told you lot. Stay about from my pub.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:09, Reply)

that's why i rescued Friday withb this gem of a thread

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:04, Reply)

Looked more like a competition to me.
Think I won.
(Twangy Rubber, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:09, Reply)

alright twangy rubbber

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:10, Reply)

*waves*

(Twangy Rubber, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:11, Reply)

So...are you new to OT?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:11, Reply)

Wet behind the ears, me.
You could tell me anything about anyone on here, and I'd be none the wiser
(Twangy Rubber, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:14, Reply)

second time lucky with the link
please tell us a bit about yourself so we can bully you.

thnx
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:21, Reply)

You'll have to wait til next year for that

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:23, Reply)

Since when has this place needed facts to bully people with?
Just make some stuff up - I'm sure it'll be more interesting than any evidence of my bent spasticity that I can manage.
(Twangy Rubber, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:26, Reply)

^speed walker

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:27, Reply)

mine

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:30, Reply)

Not a nonce by any chance?
That'd be well LOL
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:28, Reply)

looking for a FRIEND^

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:29, Reply)

hey! Baggenfock!
You manage to be even more unpopular than me.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:35, Reply)

What is the question then friend?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 10:56, Reply)

errr, do you like weather?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:03, Reply)

It's alright.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:04, Reply)

Bit overcast here
Shoddy work, weather
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:11, Reply)

Bit grey, not warm
Kind of meh.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:21, Reply)

this is bascially a description f the midlands

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:22, Reply)

He's not in the midlands

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:23, Reply)

i thought he was a Cov local?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:24, Reply)

He dunt live here though

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:26, Reply)

that doesn't make it not a description of the midlands though does it

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:31, Reply)

It's a beautiful part of the country

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:33, Reply)

Leamington (Cubbington actually) is still Midlands
Just not in the West Midlands - over the border in Warwickshire
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:31, Reply)

Nah mate, Warwickshire

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:32, Reply)

Which is in the Midlands.

( Kroney, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:33, Reply)

Whatever

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:33, Reply)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Warwickshire
( Kroney, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:33, Reply)

Very good.
Some sunny spells over The City with intermittent lol.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:07, Reply)

I hope giant hailstones break your fucking head open.

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:20, Reply)

bit harsh mate

( Peej, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:22, Reply)

8 on the Beaufort scale of upset^

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:22, Reply)

I hope CEOP finally catch up with you.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:22, Reply)

Big Daddy was better.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:24, Reply)

Tonight I are be mostly eatin phish food ice cream

( Peej, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:36, Reply)

salmon fajitas.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 3 Oct 2014, 11:37, Reply)