why is psychochomp doing GCSE maths?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 16:52, 7 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

because he's a massive greasy prickhole?

(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:53, Reply)

sounds about right.
How's the sunburn. I seem to have got the stench of shit out of my hair after 2 showers.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 16:55, Reply)

false alarm
a lager shandy has sorted everything out
(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:57, Reply)

lager hand
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 16:59, Reply)

I've got grubby grubby fingers
I don't want to get them even grubbier
(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:00, Reply)

lager shandy? I thought you said you weren't a big fucking girly woofter gay pants.
Stunned and his lager tops are nearly unforgivable, I think you've gone too far.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 16:59, Reply)

I'm quite partial to daytime shandies when I'm doing manual labour
I sometimes have lager and lime if I'm feeling a bit cheeky
(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:04, Reply)

I probably shouldn't admit this, but I'm partial to a Rose spritzer on a hot day after some hard work.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:21, Reply)

alright stunned poster

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:01, Reply)

stfu cunt, windy pig did this already

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:01, Reply)

you're like a slow loris, but slower. and uglier. and shorter. and you live in a flat not a tree.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:03, Reply)

+ half

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:04, Reply)

i could live in a house, since i own one of them too, could you afford that?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:04, Reply)

I already own a house.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:05, Reply)

I bet you have a mortgage

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:05, Reply)

oh, right, yeah, I own 67 ish percent of a house. soz mate.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:10, Reply)

gutted I win again, better luck next time looser

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:13, Reply)

you win this time, but next time height, or head size or taste in shirts comes up,
I'll have the upper hand then
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:15, Reply)

Apology accepted

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:22, Reply)

coz A level is too advanced for him ?

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:55, Reply)

he might get there.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 16:56, Reply)

Already got a B at A level maths thankyouverymuch

(PsychoChomp, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:58, Reply)

lolthicko

(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:59, Reply)

because I don't know or care?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:56, Reply)

you're the reason I drink.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 16:57, Reply)

because I drink too and you want to be like me, I know

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:57, Reply)

I'm the reason I drink.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:59, Reply)

I did maths up to a-level and it never taught me nuffin' I'd rather be quicker at arithmetic so I could score darts quicker.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:56, Reply)

I'm pretty sure all those style of maths problems do is try and push children to learn critical thinking,
getting the answer is only half the point.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 16:58, Reply)

Yeah. It's quite weird though because whilst the syllabus encourages critical thinking a lot of teachers certainly didn't.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:58, Reply)

I know a few guys and gals my age that seem to have got in to teaching.
They are not critical thinkers. If I'm honest, I'm not sure they're any sort of thinker.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:01, Reply)

Yes, some people I know are as well. With the exception of one they're not either.
One of my mates missuses is a primary teacher which means she bollocks him like a naughty child when he's dicking about... "you're making me cross".
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:04, Reply)

ha, yeah, our singer is a primary school teacher, and a good one as far as I can tell,
we were all pissed up and giving him some stick, and he turned all teacher on us "will you please calm down, and stop messing around, or I will get angry"
only Made it worse.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:07, Reply)

It's better than the other way round.
Can you imagine the grief if they told a class full of eight year olds to fucking pack it in, you unfunny bunch of cunts?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:14, Reply)

proper lol.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:15, Reply)

I thought quite critically of a lot of my teachers.
Especially the one who was shagging all the sixth form girls.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:02, Reply)

needs something to talk about with his new bird?

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:56, Reply)

is his new bird a pre-pubescent girl?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 16:58, Reply)

I am suggesting that he is a big ol wrongun
he is Gadding it about all over the place
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:00, Reply)

I think most kids doing GCSEs are 'pubescent'
In fact, quite a few of them round here seem to be 'right slags'.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:00, Reply)

not in your day right, grandma

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:02, Reply)

See above.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:03, Reply)

Are you exempt because they were 'o-levels' back then?

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:05, Reply)

I'm not that old.
I did GCSEs, mate.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:06, Reply)

She didn't see Jurassic park at the cinema because she was too young.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:06, Reply)

I'm actually doing a course on financial and capital markets
but you get tested on rate changes, statistics and data sets to see if you're up for it.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:58, Reply)

fuck your life

(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:59, Reply)

learning deserves mockery

(PsychoChomp, Fri 22 May 2015, 16:59, Reply)

you've got a century of life at most
there are some things it's really not worth learning
(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:02, Reply)

You should never stop learning.
There's always something more to know.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:03, Reply)

there's a million interesting things to learn
and he's chosen a shitdull thing instead
(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:04, Reply)

That's your opinion.
It might be fascinating to some people.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:05, Reply)

It's no pier chat.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:06, Reply)

Nothing beats pier chat.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:11, Reply)

Not even going to the pier?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:13, Reply)

and we call those people "fucking idiots"

(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:06, Reply)

Looking back I kind-of regret choosing subjects I already knew at university for my non 'core' modules so I could sleep through the lectures.
I might have learned something.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:06, Reply)

I'm glad I dropped out, it never suited me and I managed to do all right learning on the job.
Although, I would like to do a few qualifications now, just stuff that's interesting to me.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:08, Reply)

It wasn't so much that. For the first couple of years (four year degrees in Scotland) only a third of the credits were computer science.
You could tell what I was interesting as my CS stuff was graded 2:1 / 1st levels and my non-cs stuff was scraping a pass.

I wasn't forced to go to university but it was heavily encouraged by various people; whilst the downsides of manual work or engineering were regularly mentioned nobody once mentioned the crippling ennui and petty bullshit you can experience in office work and it's something i'm seriously not very happy about.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:14, Reply)

Although by the time I finished university i just wanted to work as I was fed up of the false responsibility.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:15, Reply)

u OK babez?

(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:17, Reply)

No I'm a fucking curmudgeon.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:18, Reply)

First year of Scottish uni is more or less the second year of A Levels.
Coming from an English school into a Scottish uni, I went straight into second year. In a way, I would have enjoyed an extra year learning something from scratch.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:16, Reply)

I went to a Scottish uni for this reason; my a-level grades were a bit shit.
My options were alright Scottish uni or ex-poly.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:19, Reply)

I was basically told if I wanted it paid for, it had to be a Scottish one.
Saying that, I loved living in Glasgow, and I'd go back any time.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:21, Reply)

RGU?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:21, Reply)

Where's that one? Dundee? Aberdeen?
Ah. Aberdeen it is.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:22, Reply)

Aberdeen.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:22, Reply)

k

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:28, Reply)

yeah, I think I dodged a bullet staying out of the office environment,
But don't underestimate the petty bullshit that can filter through a workshop or site, or even catering work like I did before.
The only advantage to not being tied to a desk or computer is you can just walk away from those people, which is much harder if the people are sat across the table from you.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:17, Reply)

I regret not choosing subjects and institutions on the basis of M:F ratios.

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:14, Reply)

my mate switched from some sort of engineering to dentistry for this exact reason

(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:16, Reply)

my sister did a masters in forensic science, and out of 30 people on her course, there was one guy.
The only time I ever saw him, he looked very pleased with himself.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:19, Reply)

particularly the term they studied semen stains

(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:33, Reply)

I love captain pugwash!

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:34, Reply)

why does that involve convoluted gsce style maths problems that serve little to no purpose except to gauge if you can Google a simple equation?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:01, Reply)

That's rate change maths, same principles for increasing yeilds on a diamond mine or share price than mph.
Variable change over time.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:04, Reply)

rate change maths is called "calculus" and doesn't involve hypothetical train speeds and trivial arithmetic

(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:06, Reply)

this is my thought

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:07, Reply)

Yes it does
another important part of maths is logic
If the "set" calculus contains all mathematical study of change, does it contain hypothetical train speeds which vary over time?
(PsychoChomp, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:13, Reply)

no wonder you believe all that conspiracy SciFi bollocks
you're thick as fuck
(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:14, Reply)

look, he does his.maths stuff, he gets a funny online qualification, no one in any work environment cares, but it makes him feel better.
It's like when I tell the apprentice he's done a good job when what I mean is "thank you for not fucking anything up like normal" I know what I mean, the other guys in the workshop know what I mean, but he gets to feel like he's done good.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:20, Reply)

It's like when I have a shit and give myself a round of applause

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:20, Reply)

This is why you should just send the apprentice down the burger van while the adults do the proper work.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:22, Reply)

he is very very good at the coffee and bacon sandwich run on a Friday now.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:23, Reply)

There you go. I'm sure there's a big pot of screws you can have him sort out as well.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:23, Reply)

I feel a bit sorry for him at times,
But most of the time, I'm angry at him for leaving half my tools lying in various plant rooms.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:26, Reply)

I know the feeling. One of our grads is quite competent but is still in uni mode where he's trying/thinks he's the smartest kid in class.
Although he can do shit boring jobs quicker than I can because he'll actually do them rather than avoid them.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:30, Reply)

always give the hardest job, to the laziest man, he'll find the easiest way to do it

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:32, Reply)

\o/

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:33, Reply)

I think you should print it out and hang it above your desk.
If you can be bothered.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:34, Reply)

My desk is a metaphor for that slogan as it is.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:46, Reply)

You don't have to be clinically insane to work here
but it helps
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:47, Reply)

Can't have things like that. It would indicate a glimpse of humanity.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:54, Reply)

Logic's more of a philosophical construct.
They just strip the handwaviness out of it for maths and science.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:17, Reply)

Do you think if Meatsnake got two pairs of size five and a half
New Balance trainers it would compensate for the lack of size elevens?

Come on Vorderman, I need to know.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:05, Reply)

I'd need four legs m8, according to the laydeez I only have three

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:07, Reply)

SHITMOD EDIT: oh yeah I love them big.
(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:08, Reply)

that's bigger than I expected

(lol man river definite greek god, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:09, Reply)

leave it.
Let mcchinacunt get it
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:09, Reply)

The Isle of lol man river

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:11, Reply)

Hahahahahaha!

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 22 May 2015, 17:12, Reply)

Lend one to Stunned.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:11, Reply)

but is it recognised by employers

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 22 May 2015, 17:19, Reply)