Yay! It's Thursday evening
Happy Thursday everyone!


( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:05, 71 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Subdued, non-commital grunt in response
From The Beduin Disappointed.

Passing through on the way to an unfashionably early bed.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:10, Reply)

This watering-hole of a thread welcomes Bedouins
and any other passing nomads.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:18, Reply)

Especially if they can spell bedouin.
Knew I'd got it wrong but too slapdash to care.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:22, Reply)

No probs TD
Nomadic spelling drifts around just like nomads do.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:25, Reply)

As Henry Ford said...
If B.U.R.D. doesn't spell them things I shoot, what the hell does it spell?

I'm normally a bit of a stickler for grammatical accuracy but it's not often I feel compelled to invoke nomadic North East African tribes in print.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:31, Reply)

Evening.
Yes, I heard that lady ancrenne! Honestly, some people...

/Loves it really.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:37, Reply)

Well technically
Since I'm 6 years older than you, and a hard northerner, I suppose it's entirely likely that I could be your father...

/Stereotypes...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:46, Reply)

Greetings 'crenne and g'dad
Is the horse's collar what you find at the end of a wizzard's sleeve?
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:48, Reply)

Possibly spak...
I always thought that Harry Potter and the Wizard's Sleeve was the book that JK Rowling should have written...

*EDIT* stop it ancrenne or I'll send to bed without any supper and confiscate your laptop.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:51, Reply)

Wouldn't
You find Roy Wood's guitar at the end of a wizzard's sleeve?

Just a thought.

Not one of my better thoughts.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:54, Reply)

No, no
I like that thought.

Is everyone out celebrating al's birthday or something? It's very quiet in here...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:58, Reply)

Better book
Harry Potter's wand and JK Rowling's wizard's sleeve.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 20:59, Reply)

Re quietness
These days, the evening threads are pretty quiet. I've got no life managed to start all four of them this week.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:01, Reply)

Dunno
It's maybe a bit early.

There might be something exciting on TV.

I tend to find that whenever I venture onto OT at the moment it's dead.

If I was paranoid I'd be thinking I was the virtual equivalent of B.O..
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:04, Reply)

Sometimes it's busy
sometimes it's as dead as Labour's next election chances.

Usually the latter whenever I get on here, it must be said!

Just stuck a post up about a microbash ahead of the Edinbash if anyone's interested...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:06, Reply)

Evening all!
How is everyone?
( Mellicious is made of candy, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:06, Reply)

Don't be cheeky...
there's still the laptop confiscation!

Evening Mel; you still planning on being at teh Edinbash?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:09, Reply)

@DG
My mid-life crisis would, I think, be assuaged somewhat by meeting new and interesting people.

However, I've agreed to go and stay with my parents over the Easter weekend and as I've not been over there for a year I really think I ought to make the effort.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:12, Reply)

Yus, am still going :)
The people I was originally going with pulled out last moment but luckily piston broke said I could stay with him.
( Mellicious is made of candy, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:13, Reply)

@The disappointed.
There's always this bash you could attend.

www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/18835
( girlinthehole, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:18, Reply)

Evening Mellicious
Glad you're coming to the Edinbash. You're my favourite b3tan who I only realised was a b3tan at the last minute.

In other news, I think my underpants have grown legs. I put all my dirty pants in the wash and have found one pair that escaped.

EDIT: Evenin Blousie
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:18, Reply)

Woo!
Microbash now on calendar:

www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/18993
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:23, Reply)

Right
I'm off for some food. Play nicely, kids.

Ancrenne, I'm watching you...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:25, Reply)

Spak you make me laugh
It'll be fun to see you lot again :)
( Mellicious is made of candy, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:27, Reply)

Hi all.
I'm off shortly to read in bed.

Arthur C Clarke FTW!


I thought Mr Disappointed would like this bash, him being a northern monkey.
( girlinthehole, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:29, Reply)

@BGB
Thanks, but I had to take The Devil's Answer earlier this year.

Loose your job or commit to permanent Sundays.

As it happens that's the only Sunday I've been able to book off this year but I'll be at Headingley watching our plucky boys being comprehensively thrashed by the Aussies.

But I can stay up a bit longer tonight because I'm not needed to drive tomorrow, if that's any consolation.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:30, Reply)

Aw! shame.
We're a lot of fun when drunk.....and often when sober.


I'm off now.

Goodnight.
( girlinthehole, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:38, Reply)

Evenin'.
My shit-heap of an internet connection is fucking me around tonight.
Not so fun.

Working on the comic, but might not be able to upload it if it keeps dicking around!
How is everyone?
( Cawl, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:44, Reply)

Good night bedgoers and bon apetit food-eaters
Re Arthur C Clarke: I keep meaning to read some of his books but never get round to doing.

Speaking of media I should consume but never get round to doing, I finally got De La Soul's 3 feet High and Rising, and am currently listening to it, while cooking my dinner, doing my washing and arsing around on teh internets.

EDIT: Evenin' Kaol. Things at work have b0rked again.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:44, Reply)

aww why have things b0rked?
( Mellicious is made of candy, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:47, Reply)

Things at work?
Er... If you told me about this on Saturday, I was rather drunk, and have likely forgotten :p

EDIT: Hello Mel!
( Cawl, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:49, Reply)

Arthur C. Clarke
Very good at demolishing myths and making you think about the world and why it is. Recommended.

OK, he was a bit too fond of small boys for conventional society but some of his thinking is eye-opening.

Hit City and The Stars first.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:55, Reply)

Good evening
and good night.

Just stopped by to say I really must be going - up too late last night so I'm wiped.

Hope you've all had a pleasant evening, sleep well!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:55, Reply)

Actually, this only happened today so I couldn't have told you on Saturday
The thing I'm supposed to be responsible for maintaining keeps sprouting problems that have remained un-noticed for ages. Before my old boss left, he worked on it, and when he left, I was thrown into the deep-end. So I'm still trying to figure out how it fully works.

Edit: hibye tlic
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:55, Reply)

Hello Kaol
Long time no see! :P

Edit- Poor spak :( *squishy hugs*
( Mellicious is made of candy, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 21:56, Reply)

Ah, that's a bit gash, Spak.
Hope it gets sorted the hell out.
Anyway, 'til the weekend soon, and weekends are awesome!
( Cawl, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:03, Reply)

* enjoys the squishyness *
At least I'm on top of it and I'm given plenty of time to fix things, but I hate it when unexpected b0rkage comes up where I think I have no idea how to fix.

Anyway, I'm nomming my dinner (Smoked Ham, Bacon & Tomato Tortelloni with Arrabbiata sauce (this is actually less fancy than it sounds)) so will only post sporadically.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:07, Reply)

I had far too much
Meat for dinner. T'was awesome though.

Mel, it has indeed been far too long :p
( Cawl, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:10, Reply)

Bedtime for The Disappointed
Because I'm knackered, and I'm not needed to drive the awful school bus tomorrow, so for once I can get a long, long night's sleep.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:12, Reply)

School bus?
You a teacher?
( Cawl, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:14, Reply)

School bus!
Perhaps he's just a bus-driver.

I too thought my school bus was awful - and I was just a pupil.

'night TD
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:20, Reply)

No.
I'm a Warehouse Manager.

I work Sunday-Thursday.

But I have a PCV license and occasionally moonlight on Friday mornings if the regular driver is needed for Leeds United away coach work on Saturdays.

It's actually not a bad job but it does mean getting up at 05.30.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:20, Reply)

Ah, makes sense now!
Cheers!
( Cawl, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:23, Reply)

Good.
And if anyone from the Inland Revenue is watching - it's a different Disappointed you're looking for, right?

Definately bedtime.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:27, Reply)

Evening all
I had a ridiculously long day today, but got most of our electric wheelchair model working, apart from the bit that stops it crashing. Minor setback, no?

How are we all?

*goes to check rest of thread*
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:29, Reply)

Also,
I read that as "PVC licence".

Anyway, g'night, my gimp-tastic friend.

EDIT: PoD! The Rocket-Chair! Is it gonna be ready for Easter?
( Cawl, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:29, Reply)

Ha, you said gimp
*titters*

It should be ready tomorrow. It just needs that one bit fixed, and I think I know why it isn't working. And I'm considering taking the 810:1 gearboxes off to get the speed up a bit from the 0.19mph it's currently managing.

Rockets!

Are you well Kaol?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:34, Reply)

[Shuffles in, head down]
"Evening all" says the newbie with not a little fear and trepidation.

Might be stopping by here a bit as QoTW has gone all shit for some reason.

Not taken anyone's favourite chair, have I ?
( I_Was_Mordred, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:38, Reply)

My chair!
*is taken aback*

Oh wait, I'm in my chair.

Good evening Mordred. Are you well?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:39, Reply)

It's fine Mordred,
You're an old hand.
I trust you've got a sacrifice?
( Cawl, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:39, Reply)

The QOTW is beyond shit
but I think I made my point there so how is everyone?
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:42, Reply)

Aww, shucks !
Hi guys / girls / penguins and thanks for that kind greet.

Am I well ? A dangerous question to ask anyone over 40. I have (titter ye not) a real pain in my gonad. The right one. So bad I'm off to see the quack tomorrow morning.

My girlfriend has done research on this. Apparently I might have to give a sample. Yes, of spunk. Now, I'm hoping not. I can't imagine this would happen in the clinic, it's the sort of thing you do in a hospital room.

Surely I'm not going to have to have a Sherman in the clinic, then walk past all the other people waiting to get seen in some sort of crouch position ?

The GF tells me it could also hurt due to "over use".

Balls. Literally.

Bet you're glad you asked, eh ?
( I_Was_Mordred, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:44, Reply)

Grammary Badger!!
I'm surviving dear Badger. How are you? (Other than ranty)
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:45, Reply)

@Kaol
#SACRIFICE

Your offering disappears in a puff of smoke.

You see a four-leafed clover at your feet.

Prize for whoever knows where that comes from...
( I_Was_Mordred, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:47, Reply)

Note to self:
Don't ask old-people stuff.

Ok...
So, MAYBE you've got some kinda super-gonad-thing going on, and the stress of having to jerk it in a hospital toilet with a nurse watching will cause a blast so intense that you can shoot through walls?
( Cawl, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:47, Reply)

Kaol...
I've warned you about that overactive imagination of yours... Don't be silly.

Mordred, it's probably just a cyst; been there myself.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:52, Reply)

Things I read this week and wished I hadn't
Was waiting in hospital with my Mum and picked up an old copy of Cosmopolitan.

In their "lots of copy about sex we put in because any career girl is gagging for it, right" section entitled "Stuff you don't want to know about sex" was the fascinating piece of information that the "best" male spurt was 18 foot.

How that was verified was beyond me.

But worse was to come (cum ?).

Apparently the reason for the ridge on a gentleman's helmet is to remove spunk from a woman's foo-foo before depositing your own batter in there, to help achieve genetic success.

This I did not wish to know.
( I_Was_Mordred, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:54, Reply)

Hi there DG !
Yes, I think it's a cyst myself. There is already one on that ball, so it's obviously not happy.

And even if that had to remove a knacker, what harm would that do ?

Would it halve my sex-drive ?

That really might not be such a bad thing.

PS Things I heard this week I wish I hadn't:

My best friend's new girlfriend telling everyone round the table (and this was the first time I met her): "yeah, it must be love, because the sex isn't all that great".
( I_Was_Mordred, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 22:58, Reply)

Ooh
that's a bit below the belt!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Mar 2009, 23:01, Reply)

See, humans are pretty tame when it comes to sex.
Lady bed-bugs don't have any kind of sexual opening.
The males do something called "hypodermic insemination".

Imagine being stabbed in the guts with a rolling pin.
Now imagine that rolling pin pumping a litre of spunk into your circulatory system.
( Cawl, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 23:02, Reply)

There's really no need
for any sort of Marc Almond-inspired joke about the litre of spunk.

Anyway, I am right in thinking that the clit. is only found (when it is found) in human females, unlike any other lady-mammals who basically have to take it because of instinct, not pleasure.

Or is this crap ? Yes, I know I could get the question answered in two seconds, just am I the only one who's been told this ?
( I_Was_Mordred, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 23:07, Reply)

I'll leave you gents to it
I've been out visiting a brewery today and the tasting session has left me a bit wiped out.

Night!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 26 Mar 2009, 23:10, Reply)

Calm down Badgerkins
I'm using this week's QOTW as an excuse to get a life indulge in my new pile of stuff from Amazon.

@I_Was_Mordred: sounds like you and the gf had fun doing the 'research'.

@Kaol: That should go in the b3ta Karma Sutra.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 23:11, Reply)

In case anyone is bothered
(unlikely, I know) the #Sacrifice stuff was taken from the wonderful game "NetHack" that I remember playing in the late 80s.

Do not under any circumstances download this game or start playing it. Hours and hours and hours will be lost.

You have been warned !
( I_Was_Mordred, Thu 26 Mar 2009, 23:18, Reply)