Is it wrong to break up an engagement if you liked them first, but didn't do anything about it at the time?
But now there's renewed interest from both sides, would it be so wrong to speed up the process?
(Buckminsterfuller Bring out yer meat puppets, it's time for some fun, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:07, 20 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Yes.
Even if you didn't react in time, they've made a commitment.

That should be respected.

If they actually split, then go for it. If not, sorry, can't be helped.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:09, Reply)

ohhhh.........
that's awkward.
have you tried talking to the other person in the engagement? see their reaction first?
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:10, Reply)

Do what you want
I don't give a shit.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:12, Reply)

Then why comment?

( girlinthehole, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:12, Reply)

because they have to know that I'm not here to help them make the moral decisions of their lives
and they should grow up and take responsibility for their actions.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:28, Reply)

Jesus Christ!
I think we all know THAT.

It's just good to get a sounding board now and then.
( girlinthehole, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 11:05, Reply)

The onus is on the other person to decide to stay with their current betrothed or to go back to you.
Try not to meddle to much.
( girlinthehole, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:12, Reply)

Don't be a cunt.
Wait until they split before doing anything or it won't end well. Believe me.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:12, Reply)

I'm not a cunt, i was just looking for what the general status quo would be in this situation
it's not one i've been in before
(Buckminsterfuller Bring out yer meat puppets, it's time for some fun, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:14, Reply)

Wasn't saying you ARE one, telling you not to BE one.
I was and it ended badly for all three. We ended up losing each other and none of us happy (at the time) when if I had waited maybe it would have been different.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:31, Reply)

MEAT PUPPET

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:14, Reply)

Ooo! I wonder who it is?

( girlinthehole, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:17, Reply)

It's Vipros
He wants Devil In Tights all to himself.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:23, Reply)

Hello?

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:25, Reply)

:)
We know you're keen on beardy smooches.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:35, Reply)

Bang to rights there, old boy.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:49, Reply)

hey, my meat puppet has an entirely different name
also, I'm happy to share Devil In Tights with anyone ;-)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 16:29, Reply)

If you respect the person enough who is engaged
I'd leave the engagement well alone. I've been in your situation before, and my friend is far happier with her husband than she would have been with me.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:15, Reply)

no surprise there

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 16:29, Reply)

Don't split it up, or help with it
Seriously. I've been there on both sides, and it never ends happily. Talk to the person involved, but don't split them up. You may have liked them first, but another person got their first - and if they'd split up to be with you, who's to say they wouldn't split up to be with another person?
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Thu 11 Jun 2009, 10:17, Reply)