Can we all please accept that
whatever "hilarious" michael jackson joke you're about to post is

a) actually not that funny
and
b) has probably been posted before either on here on or one of the other boards.

He's dead, he was a nonce, he was a great musician, it's kind of sad as he was a really fucked up person, but he was still a nonce so it's not that sad.

Now lets talk about something funny.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:12, 45 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

yeaah well
I only just woke the fuck up....Its all new to me bitch.
(never-right -getting it wrong since '78, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:13, Reply)

ym

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:14, Reply)

damn, beat me to it

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:14, Reply)

becky beats everyone to my mum
she can't get enough.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:15, Reply)

Like the cat that got the cream.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:15, Reply)

damn straight

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:16, Reply)

cat crack whore

cream old lady
(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:17, Reply)

My cat died last night
that's more important and NOBODY GIVES A FUCK!!!!!!!!11111!!!!
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:15, Reply)

well then bitch and moan about it until someone does give a fuck

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:16, Reply)

That's sad
did your cat record the one of the biggest selling albums of all time?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:16, Reply)

You're gonna look real stupid
If it did.
( Cawl, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:21, Reply)

Oh shit, is it keyboard cat?

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:22, Reply)

I don't even own a cat
do I have to explain this was a piss take?
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:41, Reply)

You know how people feel about cats on this board
why would you joke about something like that.

You sick fuck.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:43, Reply)

Clearly yes. How the fuck would we know that
lying about your cat dying on this day of great bereavement is uncalled for and wrong. I hope you feel ashamed of your actions. CUNT
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:44, Reply)

It was sick
so I had to put a shovel to it.
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:53, Reply)

I NEARLY DIED LAST NIGHT.
There was a fire engine and everything.
Guess it wasn't my time.
Take that, MJ.
( Cawl, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:17, Reply)

Did you get stuck in a tree?

(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:17, Reply)

No.
My brother's car caught fire, the handbrake cable melted, and the whole thing rolled into my house.
( Cawl, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:19, Reply)

Christ, that actually sounds a bit serious
is there much damage?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:21, Reply)

Nope,
We were really lucky.
When it hit the house my sister woke up, called the fire brigade and woke everyone up.
( Cawl, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:22, Reply)

Always
some drama with you isn't it
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:24, Reply)

Yeah.
My life is pure liquid excitement.
( Cawl, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:25, Reply)

Hooray
for your sister and her speeding phone dialling SkillZ.

She could probably emigrate to Australia with them.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:24, Reply)

Well, she woke me up screaming
"Kaol, THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE!".

I apparently said "OK" and went back to sleep.
( Cawl, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:24, Reply)

Fair Play
unless she's holding a cup of fresh coffee there's no need to go rousing people so early.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:25, Reply)

Exactly.
They're all outside throwing water on the thing, and I'm sleeping away.

The fire brigade couldn't find my house. Reassuring, that.
They drove past my lane, and my brother had to go chase them down. In the other car. Took him two miles.
( Cawl, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:28, Reply)

DId they miss the fuck of big burny thing?
or did they assume that must have been some other fire?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:29, Reply)

I don't live on the main road.
No way you'd be able to see it from there.
It's more like:
Leave the main road. Drive a mile on small country road.
Turn up smaller country road.
Turn into small cluster of houses that are clearly signposted.

Problem is that mobiles and sat-nav don't work where I live.
I don't know why.
( Cawl, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:31, Reply)

Are you sure it's nothing to do with your tinfoil headgear?

(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:32, Reply)

...
They can't see me if I type really small.
( Cawl, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:34, Reply)

We can all see you
you big freaky tall giant man
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:34, Reply)

Disco inferno

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:19, Reply)

Win!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:23, Reply)

I reset my phone last night
because it was playing up and after I had done it remembered that I have also wiped my computer since backing up all my contacts. Yup I am that stupid.

Must have another copy of them somewhere
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:18, Reply)

That's why you didn't text me goodnight?
:(
( Cawl, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:19, Reply)

Don't bother with her Kaol
she's evil
(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:20, Reply)

She.... .....
She said she loved me :(
( Cawl, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:21, Reply)

*sadface*

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:22, Reply)

Apparently
you and Gonz owe me an apology.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:24, Reply)

I'm sorry
you're an unfunny cunt who needs such internet validation
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:32, Reply)

Give him a minute, he'll get a picture of himself up on here in his pants
NOT VECTORED
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:35, Reply)

Here you go
check THIS out
(Bazongaloid, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:37, Reply)

Just as I suspected
you are a life size Ken doll
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:47, Reply)

Do Not Want
again
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 26 Jun 2009, 9:38, Reply)