Alan Mother Fucking Johnson - What a fucking cunt.
What is it with the Home Office? Every single person that becomes Home Secretary seems to be taken out the back and turned into a card carrying facist cunt. And I'm not using that term lightly.

So now, that fucking smarmy cunt prick is proposing to make it impossible for me to leave the country without having all my personal details stored on the National Identity Register as part of my passport application.

Why is it still illegal to cut his fucking balls off and stuff them down his throat until he dies of extreme ball chokage?

It makes me so fucking angry. And not in an amusing, lets get ANGRY on the internet way, in a serious, this is a real threat to our present idea of liberty, kind of way.

Who's with me now? Let's march on Whitehall and cut his dick off and then make Gordon eat it with a small onion salad. Brothers and Sisters, together we CAN make a difference. Say it loud! Say it proud! I'm generally apathetic about most things and kind of disagree with you up to a point but i'm not really gonna do anything about it and i'm PROUD
(Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:33, 40 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I'm generally apathetic about most things and kind of disagree with you up to a point but i'm not really gonna do anything about it and i'm PROUD
Yup, that's me.

*punches air citizen Smith style*
( girlinthehole, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:37, Reply)

Right On SISTA!

Now would you like a cup of tea while we wait for some other people to wander past and ask what we're doing?
(Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:39, Reply)

*puts kettle on*
One lump or two?
( girlinthehole, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:45, Reply)

no milk or sugar in mine please
Want a biscuit?
(Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:47, Reply)

I am not happy with this either.
It's going to make life exceptionally difficult working where I do because it'll make checkin twice as long and no one will appreciate it...
( Maladicta, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:41, Reply)

*shrugs*
I'll just keep using my Irish passport in that case, until I'm forcibly repatriated.

Edit: for sale, one British passport, slightly used.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:42, Reply)

*buys*
*sells on ebay*
*profits*
( Maladicta, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:46, Reply)

It might make it more difficult for people to get in, too.
Did ya think about that?
Did ya?
Did ya?
( thealternativefact, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:43, Reply)

*trips over sniffer dog*

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:43, Reply)

I've said it before
but because I started this one, this is now my officially favourite meme.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:44, Reply)

I'm living the meme
*goes dogging in honda accord*
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:52, Reply)

heh "living the meme"
*salutes*
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 1 Jul 2009, 8:34, Reply)

I was waiting for the "at least I can HAVE a passport" comment.
I don't know how I feel that it's not there.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:44, Reply)

Do it.
DO IT!
( thealternativefact, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:45, Reply)

It's not my joke!
I want an Irish passport.
I'm not sure if I'm entitled to one though, never having lived there, but having an Irish mother.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:47, Reply)

probably.
They are quite generous in handing them out.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:52, Reply)

I was actually trying to make a serious point
and although I realise the internet is not the place for such things, I do like to try and occasionally expand the minds of the plebs who frequent this board.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:45, Reply)

pearls before swine, my dear chap.
Pearl necklaces before swine flu.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:46, Reply)

pearls before swine?
what on earth does that mean?
(Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:47, Reply)

*mutters*
the lack of culture on this site...

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pearls_Before_Swine

(you were being funny, right?)
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:49, Reply)

I guess
Not saying it SHOULD be there, just saying I read "althegeordie" "passports" and expected something about being able to work wherever you wanted in the EU.

It's good to see you breaking the mould a bit :P
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:49, Reply)

and now I really want an onion salad.
Damn you, al!
*shakes fist*
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:44, Reply)

Order an indian
we get free onion salad at ours.

I'm off to bed now, night night.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:46, Reply)

Off to expand your mind a bit more, no doubt.
( thealternativefact, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:47, Reply)

is that the term for it these days?
I'm so not down with the kids.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:48, Reply)

Surely going down on a kid is close enough?

(Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:49, Reply)

you'd think that.
But it's hard to speak the lingo with your mouth full.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:50, Reply)

I'm off to bed to think of you in a bukkake meltdown

(Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:48, Reply)

*winks*
i a
( thealternativefact, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 22:50, Reply)

Puff!

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 1 Jul 2009, 1:34, Reply)

al, which personal details?
Just wondering. Cause surely they have those already?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 23:00, Reply)

Length and girth
which is why Al is angry about it because he has neither
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 23:10, Reply)

It is fucking ridiculous
Most of you are probably aware just how much I fly and how much it means to me, and when do I am on a very tight budget with time - I cannot afford to spend an hour or so dicking around at the airport because some jumped up prick in whitehall has decided that I'm not fucking safe to leave the country.

I generally don't mind my details being stored, but I don't trust the government to keep them safe or to not mis-use them as far and I can throw a ton of feathers.

Very fucking angry now - THIS IS WHAT FUCKING PASSPORTS ARE FOR! Fuck ID cards, fuck ID registers, just fuck off you pricks and leave me to it!
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 23:10, Reply)

As if checkin wasn't long enough anyway!

( Maladicta, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 23:14, Reply)

I have no passport
they aint got shit on me.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 23:10, Reply)

Same
but it only allows us to go abroad to the IoW, not that i mind the IoW
(smathels left-wing not feckin' chicken wing, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 23:24, Reply)

Mine is through choice though, it expired and I haven't renewed it yet.
I don't want to know the reason why you don't have one, but I'm sure I can guess.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 23:25, Reply)

you could..
but you'd be wrong
(smathels left-wing not feckin' chicken wing, Wed 1 Jul 2009, 0:04, Reply)

Just like Mark Mothersbaugh said in an interview
"The price of ones freedom, is their freedom"
(smathels left-wing not feckin' chicken wing, Tue 30 Jun 2009, 23:23, Reply)

Al in not being able to leave the country shock!
Who knew????
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 1 Jul 2009, 1:35, Reply)