I'm craving sex

( Captain V, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:46, 2 replies, latest was 17 years ago)

Stortford.
Waitrose carpark.
23:30.
( Cawl, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:46, Reply)

Excellent
Should I bring anything with me?
( Captain V, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:48, Reply)

The usual, I expect:
lube, a bag of fake beards, and half a bottle of vodka.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:49, Reply)

Yeah.
Bang-on.

I'm glad, btw, that the CD I burned you made such an impression.
( Cawl, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:50, Reply)

From an email yesterday...
Terrible Horse Porn
Terrible Horse Porn II: Italian stallion
Terrible Horse Porn III: Black Beauty
Terrible Horse Porn IV: Hung like a donkey
Terrible Horse Porn V: Ride me raw
Terrible Horse Porn VI: The mountie gets mounted
Terrible Horse Porn VII: The whip
Terrible Horse Porn VIII: Bareback
Terrible Horse Porn IX: The fuckening
( Captain V, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:52, Reply)

Are these actual grot films?

(Bazongaloid, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:52, Reply)

No.
V/Crack'll explain, I've gotta pop out for a bit.
( Cawl, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:54, Reply)

No
Me and CHCB are going to film them all over the summer. I'm playing the innocent stable girl and she's playing the horse.

:edit: I delivered a film Kaol burned to CHCB. He'd labelled it "Terrible Horse Porn IX: The fuckening"
( Captain V, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:54, Reply)

Oh god

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:55, Reply)

Neeeiiiiiigggghhhhhhhh!!!!!
*flicks tail*
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:57, Reply)

I've just been reminded
of that thing Channel 4 did on fetishes and the pony girls with the horse tail butt plugs.

*sadface* Why does my brain keep things like that
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:00, Reply)

What's a horse tail buttplug?

(Bazongaloid, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:04, Reply)

Ronseal.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:05, Reply)

No it's not fucking ronseal or I wouldn't have asked the fucking question.
I thought it could have been a butt plug made of a horses tail, not a butt plug with a tail attacked so you could pretend to be a horsey.

*grumble grumble grumble bloody women grumble grumble grumble*
(Bazongaloid, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:10, Reply)

You lead a remarkably sheltered existence

( Captain V, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:13, Reply)

You disappoint me.
I thought you knew all the interesting sex stuff. I looked up to you for your Angry Pirate experience.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:13, Reply)

Beeeep
www.fetters.co.uk/index.php?main_page=product_info&products_id=922&zenid=78c1af3cb3e1d3f85760956b6840b496
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:07, Reply)

Yes I did just search "horse tail butt plug" in google images, at work, with safe search off
Safe for work
( Captain V, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:08, Reply)

No you didn't,
you just took a picture of your bedside table.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:09, Reply)

What the blue fuck?
*fears*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:06, Reply)

This:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animal_roleplay

NSFW because of a wee picture of a woman in clichéd crap black leather and buckles.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:08, Reply)

It's not that cliched to be honest...
It's a fairly uncommon get up and probably custom made.

Not much else than black leather is used for harnesses.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:21, Reply)

it's that kind of fashion
that puts me right off the fetish scene.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:31, Reply)

Just because leather mostly comes in black?
What about rubber, or some of the other myriad materials and items used?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:32, Reply)

leather does not mostly come in black!
I know this to be true because my grandfather makes bagpipes.

Latex is worse and rubber does nothing for me.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 13:04, Reply)

It's not long 'til my birthday...

( Captain V, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 12:07, Reply)

They will be when I finish filming.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:54, Reply)

But we got you neutered

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 11:47, Reply)