Groo ....
Thank the relevant deity that's over. It is now two days since I had surgery to remove an ovarian cyst.

Going in, I was prepped for the worst. Suspected Endometriosis. Might have to take out one ovary and maybe some of the fallopian tubes.

Shit. Wasn't really hoping for a third child anyway, but, Really?

And then came the Bowel Prep. [warning, icky stuff]

The prepatory reading was bad enough. It outlined a 3 day diet that a supermodel would've considered a tad severe. Only to be followed by a course of laxatives, followed by a Full Bowel Purge.

The words, "If your anus become excoriated, please apply vaseline or lanolin" should never be read by a straight housewife in her thirties. I don't even know what the word excoriated means! And I went to Uni! And studied English Lit. Fat lot of good that was.

So ... I was ... in fact ... weeing out my bum for 2 days.

This my dears, is a Coming of (Middle) Age Ceremony. Don't laugh. You're bound to be next. The list of overly intrusive medical tests seems to have exponentially multiplied the SECOND I turned 30.

[/end icky stuff]

So, end result;

No endometriosis. Yay!

Four scars on my belly. Boo.

Ovarian cyst excised and gone for good (hopefully). Yay lots!

Going to bed now. All this excitement has fair done for me nerves.

Bugger ... I should just buy a pearl twin set and change my name to Hyacinth.
(Que?, Tue 21 Jul 2009, 11:19, 7 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Good to hear.
It's nothing to do with middle aged and more to do with being a women. Being poked and prodded in the nether regions is our cross to bear.
( girlinthehole, Tue 21 Jul 2009, 11:25, Reply)

You love being poked and prodded

go on admit it!

Also glad you're ok, Que?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 21 Jul 2009, 11:27, Reply)

My wife went through something similar about 12 years ago.
The doctors had diagnosed her with ovarian cancer (a nasty one) but when they got inside found bad endometriosis and ovarian cysts. In that case endometriosis was a good find. The pre-operation stuff was pretty interesting. If we hadn’t been so worried, I could have made a lot of very bad jokes but I tried to be sensitive.

Don’t worry though; women are not alone; once men turn 50 they get the long tube up the other end, great fun with a day or so of cleaning out your insides prior to it all. And the doctor doesn’t even buy you a drink first as anyone should who is going to get that close to you!

I am glad everything turned out ok.
(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Tue 21 Jul 2009, 11:33, Reply)

Please think twice before adding line breaks -- your post will be skipped over if it looks too spread out or is a wall of text.
fucking hell you people.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 21 Jul 2009, 11:31, Reply)

I was in the hospital
last week for a scan to see if I had ovarian cysts. Fortunately it doesn't look like I do, for which I am thankful - I don't much fancy undergoing any of the proceedings you mention. Not that the ultrasound wand up the clopper was fun, you understand, but at least it's not surgery and the world falling out of my red raw arsehole.
Excoriated. *shudders*
(berk, Tue 21 Jul 2009, 11:32, Reply)

Get well soon!
My dearest girlfriend had an ovarian cyst (amoungst other things) prior to her op last year. She was under the impression, due to incredibly shit hospitals in Wales, that she had endometriosis - for the last twenty-five years. Turns out she doesn't.

But prior to this latest op her cyst came back after she started taking the pill again. Apparently it can effect some women like this. Might be worth checking this out if you haven't already.

Cheers
( SpankyHanky, Tue 21 Jul 2009, 11:40, Reply)

Middle age??
I'm going into surgery in the next month for similar stuff... I'm 17. Apparently middle age is just around the corner then..
(Holy Gabrielle is Holy, Tue 21 Jul 2009, 12:35, Reply)