Vipros' log
been at work since half 8. Bored out of my mind already.

anyone doing anything exciting today?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:18, 48 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I may start being an utter cunt to you later
depending on how bored I get :p

It's looking more likely that I'll just fall asleep at my desk though. I need to figure out how to make a lot of money in a short amount of time so I can pay my rent as well :s
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:21, Reply)

Get on the game
It's a steady job and you can work from home!
( Captain V, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:24, Reply)

I'm going to pass
having to sleep with fatties and baldies sounds awful.

Pimping you out on the other hand....
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:26, Reply)

I'm fine with that
CHCB probably owes you a fair bit by now.
( Captain V, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:27, Reply)

I'll send her an
invoice right away
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:29, Reply)

We're talking pennies,
right?
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:33, Reply)

I'm afraid
he's on my "specialist" list, being a gnome and all, so you actually owe me £27.63
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:34, Reply)

My money is his money and all that,
so he can pay it. We share everything. Except that hooker, the one with the red PVC boots. She's all mine.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:35, Reply)

you need to go out and get some customers
unless you have a pimp. still hard work.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:27, Reply)

She could advertise
in Off Topic
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:28, Reply)

she said she didn't want to sleep with fatties and baldies
so that rules out all of /talk and half of /OT
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:29, Reply)

I'm not fat or bald
Woo
( Captain V, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:29, Reply)

No Shorties either

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:30, Reply)

Obviously the old axiom
'beggars can't be choosers' has passed you by!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:31, Reply)

Hell yeah
I'm well picky me
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:34, Reply)

Oh dear
You'll be getting no money from me then.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:39, Reply)

Perhaps there are exceptions for people that fit all 3 criteria.

( Captain V, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:47, Reply)

But I'm not short!

(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 10:07, Reply)

Good point
Although actually sleeping wouldn't likely be on the agenda.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:30, Reply)

Dunno
I could get some sleep while they attempted to massage some life in their tiny flacid member
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:31, Reply)

Or stick some posters up around town
A simple "If you are a police officer please ignore this poster" should be enough to avoid any trouble.
( Captain V, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:29, Reply)

Money-making
Some dubious ways to raise finance quite quickly:

Robbing a bank
Mugging old ladies
Prostitution
Blackmail (if you know someone's dirty secret)
Begging
Street theatre

There are plenty more.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:26, Reply)

I won the pub quiz last night,
I'm still drunk.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:32, Reply)

what was your finest moment?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:33, Reply)

Not spilling her pint.

( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:43, Reply)

I met a girl

(PsychoChomp, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:55, Reply)

Lezzie!

( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:58, Reply)

So this is where all the mongs are.
Morning mongs.
I'm in Cornwall and it's raining like fuckery.
( thealternativefact, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:46, Reply)

Aren't you a bit early for the Easter bash?

( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:47, Reply)

I'm gently preparing Dad for the onslaught.

( thealternativefact, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:49, Reply)

Is he single?
*waggles eyebrows*
( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:51, Reply)

Not really, no.
Perhaps we can find you a nice fisherman.
( thealternativefact, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:55, Reply)

Oooo yes please!
I like men in rubber.
( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:57, Reply)

I'm assuming from your reaction you've never met a fisherman....

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 10:02, Reply)

I've seen Trawlermen on the telly.

( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 10:08, Reply)

you can't smell them through the telly

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 10:08, Reply)

Nothing that a good bath and a bit of Old Spice won't fix surely?

( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 10:10, Reply)

Morning Chief Mong
*recites the mong's promise*

*mong salute*
( Captain V, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:47, Reply)

Hello my tiny chum.
Behaving?
( thealternativefact, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:50, Reply)

Very no
I'm upholding mong law which prohibits good behaviour!
( Captain V, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:51, Reply)

That's my boy.
Good work.
( thealternativefact, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:55, Reply)

raining like fuck here too
I think the whole south west is going to be wet for a long long time
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:52, Reply)

Well the rain has made it
all the way up to the Midlands too :(
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:54, Reply)

Sodding country.
Airday is going to be interesting...
( thealternativefact, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:55, Reply)

Airday?
Are you crazy cornish making up new days again?
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:57, Reply)

Not us.
The Navy. I am going to Airday and it will be busy with men in uniforms.
Poor me.
( thealternativefact, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 9:59, Reply)

cock
I hope it's not raining at the weekend at knebworth, that'd be shit.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 10:03, Reply)

Ha
It's not raining here in sunny London!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 29 Jul 2009, 10:09, Reply)