I'm going to be spending some quality time
with the girlfriend.

Playing in a pre-season friendly before all the Ra-ra-ra-Ruperts get back and the college football league starts aproper.

And I'm going to conquer Essex in the name of Cambridgeshire now that the last of the Vampires has left.

This weekend has WIN written all over it.





And linebreaks too!
( djtrialprice, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 14:43, 1 reply, 17 years ago)

Girlfriend?
You have a girlfriend?

sorry

You have a girlfriend?

How did that happen?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 14:47, Reply)

He had his hair cut and finally women could see his face.

( girlinthehole, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 14:48, Reply)

pretty much what BGB said
Yep, I've managed to trick a lady into spending time with. I just need to make sure she never gets to know me properly or the jig will be well and truly up.
( djtrialprice, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 14:57, Reply)

Hasn't worked for me :(

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 14:57, Reply)

Shave the back of your head
and draw a handsome face on it
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 14:59, Reply)

Then I could stand between two mirrors
and pretend I was getting a reach-around from a beautiful stranger.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 15:05, Reply)

Ha!
That may well be the sexiest thing I've ever read on B3ta
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 15:06, Reply)

Give it time Wookie : )

( girlinthehole, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 15:03, Reply)

next time you're out at the pub
with clendrix, tell hot women that you're her carer. They love the strong, sensitive type.
( djtrialprice, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 15:04, Reply)

^This
Hahahaha!
( girlinthehole, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 15:05, Reply)

I had hoped that people would just assume....

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 15:06, Reply)

to be fair it's confusing
she claims to be yours when you're out of earshot
( djtrialprice, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 15:08, Reply)

Assumptions make an ass of u and me
I wish somebody would punch whoever made that up, if they're dead they need digging up and punching, I'd gladly do it
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 15:09, Reply)

I think that one was coined by Jade Goody
She's buried in some forest south of Stansted off the M11.
( djtrialprice, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 15:12, Reply)

I'll fucking have her for that
Would anybody mind if I came on her face too? It's not that I fancy her or anything, I just like the idea of my sperms getting cancer.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 15:13, Reply)