I'm about to have a shower to try and wash the Autism off.
talk amongst yourselves.
(Richard Earl of Cambridge Cruel, Savage, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 11:31, 74 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Nah!
It's like scabies, it's under your skin.
( girlinthehole, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 11:42, Reply)

TOO LATE
I put some money in the charity pot on the bar for you.
( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:10, Reply)

I don't know if the filth I'm covered with is typical london filth or if it's bash filth.

(PsychoChomp, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:28, Reply)

It's seeping from within.

( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:28, Reply)

that's pretty true.
I had an interesting train journey home in a carridge full of drunk aussies and geordies.
(PsychoChomp, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:31, Reply)

Oh dear, that sounds horrible.
I got on the N29 at about 3.30am and a man was sick all over the floor. What a lovely smell on a packed bus full of drunks.
( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:33, Reply)

It was actually really funny
the aussies were handing round doritoes and cakes and the geordies were trying desperatly to stop a girl ringing some guy she just met to tell him she loved him.
(PsychoChomp, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:37, Reply)

You'll never wash it off.
It's like Tumeric, it'll never come out!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:49, Reply)

A bit like you.
:(
( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:50, Reply)

It's comfy in my closet, thank you.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:53, Reply)

Also, has a thread been deleted this morning, or am I imagining threads again?

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:53, Reply)

The only two morning threads I knew about are still here.
Or did you mean one from last night?
( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:54, Reply)

I thought there was another one when I looked earlier.
Has Eds Meds been around again?
(Bazongaloid, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:58, Reply)

He's in the South Pole, retard.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:01, Reply)

One by spimf about Karma?

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:00, Reply)

Oh...nope, missed that one.

( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:01, Reply)

I saw that one this morning before I went out
gone by the time I got back
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:02, Reply)

BGB made a sage point about his smugness

(Bazongaloid, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:09, Reply)

Good girl.

( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:10, Reply)

I think i'd have been just as smug if I was in his shoes at the time
but then...I'm a cunt!
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:14, Reply)

Your Mrs left before I got the chance to talk to her last night
but from the very brief hello and goodbye I got I thought she was very nice.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:56, Reply)

I spoke to her,
I was impressed at her ability to talk at length about sofas
(PsychoChomp, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:58, Reply)

Spoke to her?
you were in there like a ferret up a trouser leg
(Bazongaloid, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 12:59, Reply)

Never a better description Al
For the Flimmity flam lady was a lot of the reason why I went last night and I barely even saw her :( Damn that chompy bitch
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:02, Reply)

I didn't stop you talking to her.

(PsychoChomp, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:13, Reply)

I ASKED HER ABOUT HER WEDDING AND SOFA'S
stop making me look like a sleeze.
(PsychoChomp, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:02, Reply)

You do it to yourself, you do
and that's what really hurts...
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:03, Reply)

I know, I know

(PsychoChomp, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:07, Reply)

Soft furnishings already?
Blimey.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:01, Reply)

YOU LEAVE MY WOMAN ALONE!

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:02, Reply)

INTERNET HARDMANNING

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:03, Reply)

WATCH IT, I KNOW KARATE AND I ONCE PUNCHED A MAN SO HARD HIS BALLS FELL OFF AND THEN I WENT AND DONE IT ON A PAGE 3 GIRL.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:04, Reply)

Did you touch her nipples and stuff?

(Bazongaloid, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:05, Reply)

Did you chuck your muck up her
did you do it in your porsche?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:06, Reply)

I TOTALLY DONE IT ALL OVER HER FACE, AND SHE LOVED IT, AND THEN HER MATES LICKED IT OFF HER WHILE I FIRED UP THE JET.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:10, Reply)

Well done internet :)

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:14, Reply)

Silly al, women don't *have* nipples.
And I should know, having had it off with loads of birds.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:11, Reply)

If women don't have nipples
how do they know where the ends of their boobies are?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:13, Reply)

IT'S WHERE MY MOUTH IS, BITCH.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:15, Reply)

Haha
EDIT but your mouth can't simultaneously be on every booby in the land...? ...or can it...?

Omnipre-orifice, HO
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:16, Reply)

If there is a lady in the room
DiT will be on her nipples faster than Psychochomp can pander to a 17 year old.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:17, Reply)

He's a chesticular limpet?

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:20, Reply)

I hate you very much al.

(PsychoChomp, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:23, Reply)

I hate you very much al I want to wank you off wearing oven gloves
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:26, Reply)

Your woman was lovely...
and her friend Charlie was pretty nice too.
Al, on the other hand, was terrible all night.
( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:04, Reply)

clendrix speaks the truth,
al fucking ruined it for everyone.
(PsychoChomp, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:04, Reply)

Oh dear...please rephrase that before Al sees...

( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:05, Reply)

done

(PsychoChomp, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:06, Reply)

Phew!

( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:06, Reply)

You didn't have to do that
fucking me will generally ruin it for most people.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:07, Reply)

He *is* a terrible penis.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:05, Reply)

Sorry, *has*

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:06, Reply)

...on his head

( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:07, Reply)

In your mouth

(Bazongaloid, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:08, Reply)

In the bum-bum.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:09, Reply)

Ooh!
*excites*
( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:11, Reply)

Then back in the mouth.
My, what a lovely tea party.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:12, Reply)

Cucumber sandwiches anyone?
It's ok, I kept the cling film on while Al was using it
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:15, Reply)

This tea tastes odd.
I think the milk's off...
( thealternativefact, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:17, Reply)

I did!
It was a close run thing though, I made trigger fingers at her and it was all catface could do keep his head out of my crotch.

I think there was a photo taken.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:04, Reply)

Oh God, the trigger fingers.
No-One can resist those!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:06, Reply)

Oh god I saw that
I did wonder what was going on there, but felt it safest not to ask.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:06, Reply)

I watched the beginnings of a threesome on the tube last night
from three spectacularly ugly participants. They got off at the same stop as me, but I didn't feel the need to follow.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:05, Reply)

Spectacularly ugly?
Even by B3tan standards?

Oh, and hello.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:07, Reply)

Yes, even then
Lo Bert
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:16, Reply)

Blimey
they must have been Sloth from the Goonies ugly
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:19, Reply)

To be honest
if your ugly and you get the chance for a threesome, you know in your heart that the other participants are also gonne be mingers.

Was it a boy boy girl one or a boy girl girl?
(Bazongaloid, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:08, Reply)

Ugly/Ugly/Ugly
it's all the same.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:09, Reply)

When there's ugliness involved
I don't think the sex of the participants matters.

I've done boy-boy-angry meercat far too many times
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:09, Reply)

Boy boy girl
Well I think they were anyway. One of the guys was showing off his manliness by swinging from the rail over the door. I was almost overcome by his powerful pheromones
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:17, Reply)

Fantastic.
"Oi love! LOVE! Look at me! LOOK! I'm hanging off the thing look! I am a prime example of the species and you subconsciously want to procreate with me. OH YEAH"
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:23, Reply)

OMG, were you there, did you see him too?
I really don't know how I maintained my composure when his belly fell out of his trousers.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:24, Reply)

Oh man
if I'd been there I'd have totally been all over them, I'd have taken them home, there would've been dicks, tongues, fingers and three inch cysts everywhere. We'd have had a gay old time, I'd have done them all one by one, and then we'd have played Scrabble while watching The Big Question on TV, and fwapping each other over Nicky Clark. Yeah.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:24, Reply)

There was a bash last night
and I wasn't even invited? What has this place come to?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 13:06, Reply)