what baz says
if he lies about stupid stuff he's either pathological, or you are asking too many questions
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 15:56, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

What about those who you put into a situation where they don't have to lie and they still do?
What about those fuckers?
( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 15:59, Reply)

"you put into a situation"
Are you running a concentration camp, a dungeon or a relationship?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:01, Reply)

I meant that I gave him the red light to be able to tell me anything and I would be ok with it.
He still lied : (
( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:03, Reply)

sounds like he didn't believe that you would be
that's not a man thing
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:04, Reply)

This has been most inciteful.
We should run a poll on who would prefer to be lied to versus who desires the awful truth cos it seems to me to be a guy versus gal thing from what I read here.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:05, Reply)

I ALWAYS say from the start that I don't care how bad the truth is, and that I don't need fluff or lies
You may as well shout "Bring on teh fluffeh lies!"
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:02, Reply)

oh no...
if you love me, lie to me - why hurt me?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:03, Reply)

Cos it would hurt more if someone disappeared without explanation
Or you found out they were a mong when they pretended to be a 'catch'.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:05, Reply)

better a nice comforting lie then..
dont cha think?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:06, Reply)

Only lie to me if you're a brilliant liar
and that way I'll never know.
Most lies are discovered. Most people are crap liars.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:08, Reply)

true enough...
Probably they need to practice more.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:13, Reply)

lying is easy
and easier than having an argument
....unless that argument is about lying. fuck this stuff is confusing!
(Eggstrovert isnt patronising you...honest..., Wed 23 Sep 2009, 11:03, Reply)

You said it sister.

( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:03, Reply)

they fit into one of the two categories that I mentioned earlier
what you describe sounds a little like going down the entrapment route. Men appreciate the direct approach, and have difficulty understanding the convoluted (and often slightly mental) thought processes that women go through.

also, an announcement to women everywhere. If you ask us if something is wrong, and we say nothing is wrong, it's for one of two reasons:
A) there is nothing wrong
B)there is something, but we want you to act like there is nothing wrong until it has gone away or we have resolved it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:03, Reply)

I couldn't have been more direct if I had tried.
Men just lie. They can't help it.
( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:05, Reply)

the sweeping generalisations annoy me
not having a go at you, but in general. Women lie just as much as men.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:06, Reply)

I'm starting to think that a lot of people genuinely mean what they say at the time
But 5 mins later they change their mind.
I've hardly ever lied, but it could have appeared that I have because I've made such a sudden turnaround.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:07, Reply)

I get where you are coming from there
out of interest, I lied in the story related here
www.b3ta.com/questions/guiltysecrets/post88822

one of the worst experiences of my life, but I'm convinced that the lie made it a shitload better for those involved. Would you agree?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:09, Reply)

I agree
That kind of lie is good.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:12, Reply)

splendid
validation. online. :-)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:16, Reply)

on the 'is there something wrong?' thing...
if there's something wrong, I will deal with it but get a woman involved and it suddenly seems a much bigger deal.

Also, sympathy is for girls - I want a problem solved not discussed.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:08, Reply)

spot on

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:09, Reply)

I really don't need to use questions as an entrapment.
He does a well enough job on his own.
And I don't badger him to death if something is wrong. If he says nothing is wrong and I can tell there is I leave it, because 9 times out of 10 I really don't care anyway.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:11, Reply)

how the hell is asking too many questions an invitation to lie?
I don't delve into his business. I don't need to ask questions. Silence is golden.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:13, Reply)

so is urine

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:13, Reply)

hahaha
you know what I mean, it's likely he'll talk anyway
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:17, Reply)

rubbish
I hate small talk. You are right, silence is golden.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:25, Reply)

my Missus lies a lot
but it's not malicious - she's just delusional and when the lie is pointed out to her, she laughs like a little girl that knows she has been caught - it's gas.

Knowing this about her makes her easier to manage.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:16, Reply)

lies in a "I'm wearing a green shirt" kind of way when she's clearly wearing purple?
It's all really new, we're not technically together and it annoys me that when it's so fresh he's going to be dumb, what happens when it comes to the important stuff?
edit: I'm not literally asking, I'm just saying. Just putting that out there, etc
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:18, Reply)

she says she has done things I have asked her to do
then she dashes off and does them before I find out kind of way...

If you're not techically together and he's already bullshitting then the whole thing sounds like a farce.

How long have you not technically been together?

Is there a third party involved?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:21, Reply)

ohh, that's not too bad then eh? would be nice if she just did it instead of lying?
not technically been together for a few weeks but we were the same way for a few months at the beginning of the year.
At the time he had a girlfriend, to which he said it wasn't lying because I didn't ask.
Which makes me quite pathetic and stupid for talking to him now probably.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:26, Reply)

sounds like he's just being a tosser really
doesn't much care what happens, so why not lie sort of thing.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:24, Reply)

betcha
there's a third party involved.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:24, Reply)

I bet it's the BNP

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:25, Reply)

nah man..
betcha she's nicked him off another bird.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:26, Reply)

oooo
the wily minx
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:27, Reply)

YESYESYESYES
I win!

Told you there was another bird, Vipros!

Kristine darlin' - dude is conditioned to lie - either you learn to manage him or ditch him.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:29, Reply)

I bow to your sleuthing skills
and would gladly offer my services as your sidekick should you decide to become a 19th century detective
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:30, Reply)

haha I didn't steal him! I told him to fuck off because I wasn't going to be his girlfriend on the side. And we didn't talk for 7 months.
oh I'll just stop talking now because the more I say the more I realise how dumb I really am for talking to him

besides, how can you manage a person?
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:32, Reply)

Easy!
You prey on their weaknesses and force them to depend on you.

Are you a woman or what?
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:35, Reply)

or you convince them that what you want them to do is what they want to do
I prefer to think of it as persuasion.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:36, Reply)

this happens a lot in relationships I find
as women very seldom have minds of their own.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:39, Reply)

I'm fortunate in that I'm very persuasive
and hugely opinionated :-D
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Sep 2009, 16:47, Reply)