Your beauty is beyond compare
with flaming locks of auburn hair, with ivory skin and eyes of emerald green. Your smile is like a breath of spring, you voice is soft like summer rain and I just can't compete with you Jolene.

What can't you compete with, or, who or what have you stolen from someone else.
( Bazongaloid, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 8:38, 21 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Also
POST WHORE ALERT - I just wrote a story on the QOTW. Read it bitches.
( Bazongaloid, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 8:39, Reply)

pimping your QOTW posts
is somewhat frowned upon, is it not?

On a more exciting tip, are you ready for ZZ TOP?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 8:58, Reply)

Pimping your QOTW posts
is disgusting and shallow behaviour which has no place on this website. I oppose it with every fibre of my being.

Have you read it yet?

I'm quite excited about ZZ Top, less so about Steel Panther who are the support act. I think they are totally inappropriate for a band as good as ZZ Top.
( Bazongaloid, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 9:01, Reply)

I agree
A 'comedy' hair metal act doesn't appeal to me at all.


And no, I've not read your post. Is it good? Will I like it?*


*don't forget I don't like anything at all, ever
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 9:56, Reply)

It's like David Bowie
snorting crack made from the Beatles.

You'll fucking love it.
( Bazongaloid, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 9:58, Reply)

That good, eh?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 10:24, Reply)

Is the correct answer
YM? 'cos I just can't compete with her for the boys attentions.
(stimpy, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 8:41, Reply)

Oh no you didn't just go there.
I'm shocked, you seemed like such a nice person.
( Bazongaloid, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 8:43, Reply)

I am nice!
I think. I am lacking caffine this morning, so I am slightly hyper...
(stimpy, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 8:47, Reply)

hyper becuase you are lacking caffine?
Some mistake shirley?
( Bazongaloid, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 8:49, Reply)

I don't get it either
Nicotine, caffine - both are depressives to me. Possibly because I'm so used to them. I'm no biologist, so I have no idea.

Should that have been "Shome mishtake shirly, Mish Moneypenny?"
(stimpy, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 8:52, Reply)

Thanks, that song's going to be in my head all day.
Which I don't really mind.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 9:03, Reply)

For added fun
listen to the version by Queen Adreena. It's more fun.
( Bazongaloid, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 9:06, Reply)

I can't help feeling
Your QOTW post may be taking some small liberties with the truth.

Gave me office-horn, though.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 9:10, Reply)

It's all true
I had a mad and crazy time at school.
( Bazongaloid, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 9:15, Reply)

I can't compete with Usain Bolt.
He's just too damn fast.
( girlinthehole, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 9:15, Reply)

I bet if you flashed your norks at him
you could mesmerize him for long enough to win.
( Bazongaloid, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 9:15, Reply)

I don't think he'd be mesmerized.
Stunned maybe.
( girlinthehole, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 9:52, Reply)

On a related note
To both your post and the current QOTW, There's a porn equivalent of askjeeves called askjolene. Type in e.g. "mature asian amputee" and it returns a bunch of related links. Or so I'm told.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 9:15, Reply)

Dolly's Jolene can't complete with Stan's Camouflage:
Though the proof is here that they are essentially the same song:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=IIwYcTooMAo

With flaming locks of auburn hair, with ivory skin and eyes of emerald green he was an awfully strange marine.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 10:04, Reply)

OMG!
That is the best mashup EVAH!
( Bazongaloid, Mon 26 Oct 2009, 10:09, Reply)