RRARGH!!
This morning I fixed a leaky roof and now I feel very manly as I have all the handyman skills of a satsuma. I'm so awash with testosterone that I hurled abuse at a little old lady with poor lane discipline on my way to work.

How have you reaffirmed your gender lately?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:08, 27 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

preposterous amounts of testosterone?
PREPOSTERONE!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:17, Reply)

Gold.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:31, Reply)

Preposterone Gold
Available in Holland & Barrett, and Boots
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:34, Reply)

May cause excessive sweating, involuntary grunting, priapism
And uncontrollable posting to QOTW.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:55, Reply)

will make you feel uncomfortably energetic

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 10:06, Reply)

Guaranteed morning wood.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 10:09, Reply)

May Contain Traces of
Gary Neville
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 10:10, Reply)

Wanking:
nothing manlier.

rafter
baz
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:18, Reply)

Don't women wank too?
Or is that just an urban myth.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:18, Reply)

It's a myth we like to perpetuate to make us less scary to men.

( girlinthehole, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:25, Reply)

so, all that gusset typing,
it's just sleight of hand then....an illusion?
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:28, Reply)

That's crazy talk
Women are delicate flowers for whom sex is an onerous burden. Everyone knows that.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:29, Reply)

I do feel slighty nauseous everytime I have to do it.

( girlinthehole, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:31, Reply)

That's just your gag reflex

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:35, Reply)

Girly approach to leaks...
This morning I put a bucket under the leak, rang my landlady and yelped "Mildred, the contents of my shower are falling into my living room! Call the plumber!" The cat bit my ankle because the leak is directly above his cushion and he holds me responsible.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:25, Reply)

That would have been my approach
Substituting "bloke from yellow pages" for "landlady", but I went into Focus do-it-all for a tarp or something to cover it and they had a whole shelf of tins of Rapid Roof Repair that you just paint on. So I bought a tin. And a stepladder. And a paintbrush.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:39, Reply)

Your life is the sitcom Rising Damp
AICMFP
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 10:11, Reply)

I couldn't get out of the gym car park last night.
There is no lighting in the car park and my back window was all steamed up so I couldn't see anything behind me. I was scared to death of bumping another car so took about 10 minutes to reverse out of my space.
( girlinthehole, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:27, Reply)

Well then
that's your own fault for not reversing into the space!

/bloke reply
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 11:38, Reply)

What were you doing in the back seat
to make the windows all steamed up?
(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 12:30, Reply)

I've gone one better
and realigned my gender. Like Lauren Harries, the freaky antique boy.


Suggestions for my new female name are welcomed.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:37, Reply)

Monica Boyce
or Hooty McBoob
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:39, Reply)

Two very good suggestions there
*hoiks up boobs a la Les Dawson*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:45, Reply)

a good friend of mine
married a woman call Lesley Dawson. Turns out she is a complete fucking loon.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:53, Reply)

Annie Boddy

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:44, Reply)

Tits McGee
obviously
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 9:51, Reply)

It's good
I'm thinking of changing back to a man, though. I miss my testes.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Nov 2009, 10:25, Reply)