I miss the joys of reading fiction :(

( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:38, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Me too. Textbooks all the way here :(

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:39, Reply)

WHY ARE WE DOING THIS?
WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHY?
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:40, Reply)

Fuck knows. For the last 6 weeks or so I've had the chance to read for fun on the commute to work
but instead of taking books or magazines with me I've been watching films or tv shows that I wanted to catch up on.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:43, Reply)

I'm supposed to be writing my essay but I am failing to do so.
I might have to work in the library tomorrow so I can get some stuff done.
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:52, Reply)

I can't concentrate in libraries. Too many people muttering under their breath and coughing.
My local library's shit anyway, there's always kids in it hammering away at the computers.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:55, Reply)

hammering wanking.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:05, Reply)

Pfft I mean young kids who barely know what genitals are
Their parents use the library as a creche while they fuck off to the yummy mummy cafe up the road
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:16, Reply)

fuck off to fuck the cafe up the road
.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:19, Reply)

you can't fuck a cafe.
...can you?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:23, Reply)

I have a friend who tried.
He got tossed out for interfering with the cream cakes.

*Ninja edit*
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:25, Reply)

huh huh
tossed
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:52, Reply)

we could all work together to help write your essay
like consequences, a sentence at a time each
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:00, Reply)

I'm sure that would work really well. You start.

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:01, Reply)

what's the subject?
A good start would be something like:

"considering the wealth of comment on the subject, it would be beyond the scope of this essay to commence with a full discussion of felching techniques, however, there is little written on the cultural impact that felching has had on our society and the people upon whom it has been performed"
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:04, Reply)

the last line of my MA thesis was:
"A side salad of humour with your cultural theories, madam? Yes please, and with a vinaigrette of fantasy, if I may."

I think I went mad shortly before the end
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:06, Reply)

Working from bed with a laptop's totally the way to go
I wrote a whole essay from there today. But then again, I haven't actually left the house in 2 days. My opinion may not be balanced at this point.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:04, Reply)

i love
writing essays, but I only do softy basket weaving subjects
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:08, Reply)

A tip:
Don't take electives about things you aren't even slightly interested in. Writing the essays for them is not good.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:17, Reply)

OK what's the subject
we can help write yours too
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:19, Reply)

It was about supply chain management
But it's done now. Monumental effort it took, but good to get it out of the way.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:34, Reply)

wow
that does sound dull

did you manage to quote anything interesting and unrelated to the subject? Or get a rude phrase/pun worked into it?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:38, Reply)

Not so much
Did manage a few good old cliches though. I would have put more fun stuff in if I cared.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:40, Reply)

you've got to spend money
to make an omlette

a cliche if ever I heard one
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:53, Reply)

Aww
You should keep something short and silly to read when you're not busy learning important things. I like reading The Darwin Award book. Which are full of stories about people dying in really retarded ways, they are a fun way to pass the time! :)
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:44, Reply)

I've got a book on S&M that's quite entertaining.
I'd like a good story though.
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:45, Reply)

Excellent tube reading, there!

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:47, Reply)

I did actually read it on the tube the other day.
I don't care :)
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:50, Reply)

I once read a book on the tube with a massive picture of Hitler on the cover.
I got some odd looks.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:51, Reply)

My book is instructive, rather than entertaining or historical.
Did your book tell how to constuct a huge oven or grow a fetching moustache?
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:53, Reply)

The plumbing section was very instructive.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:54, Reply)

fetching felching
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:56, Reply)

jizzlolz

( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:01, Reply)

haha
that's how I'd read it! Damn you B3TA!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:01, Reply)

read masturbate furiously.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:06, Reply)

YOU SICK PERVERT

( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:07, Reply)

Oh yeaaaah.
Etc.

I'm a nice boy really. By "nice" I don't mean gay or anything, just well mannered and useful for deep conversations about how some people you thought were decent and wholesome, but really you actually had completely the wrong end of the stick about. Like Hitler.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:12, Reply)

There seems to have been a misunderstanding.
YOU SICK PERVERT was supposed to be complimentary.
Or complementary, as Blaireau would say.
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:15, Reply)

Clickin dis

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:17, Reply)

*prouds*

( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:18, Reply)

Oh.
Would you like to talk about the finer art of cake-baking and subsidised transport?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:18, Reply)

No.
I think I'd prefer to say inadvisedly nasty things about Gonz and then wank over my screen.
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:28, Reply)

Tube reading?
Are you a gynaeocologist?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:16, Reply)

I think he pretends that he is.
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:18, Reply)

Too far
He's no Edmund
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:20, Reply)

Even Edmund
is no Edmund. Because he's Craig.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:29, Reply)

I heard that people look up to him.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:21, Reply)

Has it got pretty pictures to keep the people sitting beside you interested?

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:48, Reply)

It does have a few pictures,
but the detail's in the text and I don't let people read over my shoulder.
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:51, Reply)

That's why I like having the option of video, if people are going to watch the film over my shoulder, I put on an autopsy video instead
Usually makes them turn back to their paper.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:57, Reply)

Ooh wassat book then?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:55, Reply)

It's called
SM 101 by Jay Wiseman.
There isn't a section on fisting, though.
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:00, Reply)

Would you recommend it though?
I ain't been tied up since 2009 :(
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:07, Reply)

It's quite good.
I'm learning about some things and it's quite an easy read.
I'm not sure it will tie you up though :(
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:16, Reply)

It's ok, I can live vicariously through others' tales

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:19, Reply)

But I cannot say!
If I tell tales on here, Wookiee will cry/puke/hurt himself for reasons I cannot go into :)
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:21, Reply)

Is he really the unassuming star of most of the book?

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:23, Reply)

Precums

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:23, Reply)

Hahhaha

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:27, Reply)

Poor Wookers :(
Edit: ^hahaha
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:24, Reply)

does it have
anal violins?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:25, Reply)

It has anal violence...

( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:25, Reply)

But no fisting?
For shame
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:36, Reply)

I was most annoyed.
Do these people have no bitches at all?
( thealternativefact, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:39, Reply)

Fuck the cheese scones,
bring this book!
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 23:43, Reply)

I didn't know there was an actual book of them. I just get the Darwin awards emailed to me every year with new contenders
I'd say winners, but that seems a little odd to me ,)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:46, Reply)

Oh yeah there are tons of the books available too
Some of the deaths are just mental, they do make me chuckle! :)
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:54, Reply)

It's wrong how much of a kick we get out of them, but I've been reading them for years now and inane stupidity never ceases to make me giggle

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 6 Jan 2010, 22:58, Reply)