My testicles...
...manufacture 10 million new sperm cells each day – enough to repopulate the entire planet in only 6 months.

So - nice orderly line please; and would someone go get me a case of Red Bull.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:13, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

ha! foiled! Too late!
I am overpopulating this planet, one human at a time.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:14, Reply)

Human?
Er, have you forgotten with whom you have chosen to create?
( thealternativefact, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:16, Reply)

I am overpopulating this planet, one catfaced midget retarbed half-human at a time.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:16, Reply)

That's my girl :)

( thealternativefact, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:19, Reply)

My sperm...
...can also survive long journeys down the River Severn, hitch hike across land and find the sweet haven of a fertile young lady without her even being aware.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:17, Reply)

and I thought they had to swim upstream. Who knew?

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:18, Reply)

They are like homing pigeons.
Also - since the moon moved back 4cm last year they are not effected by the tides.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:21, Reply)

Actually
I think I saw one on an M4 slip road last week with its thumb out and a cardboard sign with "Stevenage" written on it.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:18, Reply)

That was young Barry.
He's a good lad.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:30, Reply)

You assume.
You might be firing blanks.
( girlinthehole, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:15, Reply)

But are they all viable sperm?
Or are you firing blanks?

Edit - as BGB also says above!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:16, Reply)

Two confirmed 'hits' so far...

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:18, Reply)

that's not quite
6 billion really is it?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:20, Reply)

Right...
...as if I needed an excuse to wank more often.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:22, Reply)

Well she may say they're yours. *shrugs*

( girlinthehole, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:21, Reply)

So it could all be a lie?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:24, Reply)

I'm not saying yes and I'm not saying no.

( girlinthehole, Fri 15 Jan 2010, 14:26, Reply)