I have a new cooker at last!
it fit in the hole I cut and it works and everything!

ahahahahaha

hahahaha

haha

BEWARE!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 9:38, 30 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I have a cooker too, it's nothing to be smug about.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 9:45, Reply)

I'm not smug about it
more relieved to finally have one, and a nice new one at that
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 9:50, Reply)

aaaah but
Does it have an integrated griddle pan?
( djtrialprice, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 9:56, Reply)

no, but I have a griddle pan that has only seen one use so far
I predict lots of griddled goodness
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:41, Reply)

and I know the difference between 'whole' and 'hole'
*smugs*
( djtrialprice, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 9:48, Reply)

arse
thought no one had seen that....
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 9:50, Reply)

Remember, if your cooker stops working
divorce her
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 9:59, Reply)

I'll have a pie and chips please

with cake for pudding
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:00, Reply)

I'll have a cream tea and cake please.
Try and make it cost less than £15, or is that against the Devonshire by-laws?
( djtrialprice, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:09, Reply)

When you checked the top hob was working, did you rip your shirt apart, fall to your knees and yell "I. Am. MAAAAAAN" ?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:07, Reply)

He does this anyway, every time he posts.
It gives him considerable bulk buying power at Matalan.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:21, Reply)

Oh man, my bumhole just suction-cupped to the chair at the thought of that.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:34, Reply)

not just when I post
pretty much after every action
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:39, Reply)

BOO-YA!

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:41, Reply)

I bet you sneeze at the top of your lungs going "aaaaa CHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO".

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:07, Reply)

I do actually
but I can't help it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:12, Reply)

Me too.
it's a hell of a lot of pressure to hold back, I don't know how some women manage to just go achoo. achoo.

Maybe holding a sneeze back like this causes difficulty in later life. Like rectal prolapse or something.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:14, Reply)

I know a couple of women who just flinch and don't even make a sound
and I don't mind telling you it freaks me out a little.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:17, Reply)

I've almost had my eardrums blown
sitting in a car with windows shut when my mum has sneezed. For quite a small lady she can create a hell of a pressure wave.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:19, Reply)

It's not natural I tells ya.
I bet they're the kind of women that shit rainbows and kittens.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:19, Reply)

women like that don't shit!

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:35, Reply)

Go'ead!!!!
Wiring was ok first time? That'll learn ya, you Doubting Thomas, you.

I predict steaks and mash.
Enjoy.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:27, Reply)

it was
which is nice.

Steaks and mash were quite high up the list of possible dinners for tonight
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:39, Reply)

congratulations.
Takeaways have their place (it's called 'the north') but nothing but, for days on end, must have grated somewhat, especially towards the end...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 10:53, Reply)

Last year
We didn't have a kitchen for three weeks while we were having renovations done. It was a major pain in the arse, I can tell you. The missus felt lost, what with not being able to gravitate to her natural space.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:02, Reply)

I cook from scratch every night,
just for me.

(I do occasionally go to the chippy if drunk or hungover but, shush anyway.)
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:09, Reply)

even 3 days of it was too much
had a curry, some thai stuff and dominoes, and it just wasn't satisfying in the way that cooking your own stuff is.

as DG said, I felt a bit lost as well.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:14, Reply)

Go t'pub

They'll do you a steak and mash
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:15, Reply)

I have a cooker now
so I can do it myself
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:18, Reply)

A nice takeaway every now and again
Can be manna from heaven. But there's something so satisfying about cooking from scratch.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 20 Jan 2010, 11:16, Reply)