I recently discovered that red meat is indirectly associated with Macular Deterioration, from which I suffer at an unusually early age
So now cows serve no purpose whatsoever. Useless mooing shit machines
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:09, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Awwwww, that sucks,
If your mrs suffered from it then she could imagine you were getting less and less ugly as her vision went. Sadly she doesn't. So she'll be reminded of your face every single day.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:17, Reply)

Have you put any new records on your Wedding list, Al?
Cos this one badly needs changing... bad-oom-tish
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:20, Reply)

No it really doesn't
I'm afraid you have been designated as an ugly person going out with a hottie. It doesn't mean we can't be friends you know, I'm responsible for everyone being aware of TGB gigantic genitals, but she still likes me.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:24, Reply)

Irrespective of my diagnosis
If we're to get along it might help if you talked about anything else other than how irredeemably hideous I am. TGB's gigantic genitals, of which I was previously unaware, might be a good start
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:28, Reply)

TGBs massive vagina
when viewed in all it's hideous quivering glory, is like a fucking van gogh sunflower painting when compared to your mush.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:32, Reply)

I never liked Sunflowers. The painting or the actual flower
So I choose to take that as a compliment.

Thank you
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:36, Reply)

I've just planted black sunflower seeds
because I is a big goff
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:51, Reply)

I skim read that and determined that in fact you said
I am TGB's gigantic genitals, of which I was previously unaware.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 15:23, Reply)

Are there any threads that mostly consist of answers to the question?
Or are they all essentially look at us having ace cutting banter with our smashing internet mates?
(Cave Duck, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:59, Reply)

*obligatory joke about the perceived versus actual size of my penis*

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:17, Reply)

Yeah, 'cause you have underpants made of glass,
the curvature of which acts as a magnifying glass making it appear of a normal size, only upon removal of said underpants the razor sharp edges sever your femoral artery leading to a rapid and undignified death, after which the paramedics laugh at your small penis.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:23, Reply)

I was about to come back with an indignant rebuttal
but the very last clause in your post make me snigger in a childish fashion, so my point, if I had one in the first place, is now a little on the blunt side. Hey ho.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 12 Apr 2010, 14:26, Reply)