Not one Gaz
asking if I'm ok, or to see if I am still alive. You're all bastards.

It's been at least five days since I was here last :(
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:38, 44 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

We've been busy.

(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:41, Reply)

Of course you're all right.
YOU'RE THE FUCKING GRAMMER BADGER!
( girlinthehole, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:41, Reply)

grammAr
I've missed you
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:42, Reply)

See what five days off causes?
You should be ashamed.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:44, Reply)

That's spelling, not grammar, you Deacon

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 15:16, Reply)

Hehe!
I thought I'd cracked it with the apostrophes.
( girlinthehole, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:44, Reply)

Does lead to one important question though
And I know this was discussed a couple of weeks ago viz. "Can a badger badge?"

Can a grammar gramm?
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:27, Reply)

And is there such a verb as 'to choirboy'
similar in meaning to 'to kite runner' someone?
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:31, Reply)

Has it only been five days?
It feels like a lifetime.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:48, Reply)

I know right!

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:53, Reply)

I got three

(PsychoChomp, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:49, Reply)

All from your mum?

( girlinthehole, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:51, Reply)

One from rswipe telling me someone has a baby the same name of me
one from the baroness wishing me luck with the flights
one from applebite saying she misses me loads
(PsychoChomp, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:52, Reply)

Haha!
Applebite wouldn't stoop so low.
( girlinthehole, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:53, Reply)

That's very true,
the third was from gonz about an iPad.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:54, Reply)

Just saying like

(PsychoChomp, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:51, Reply)

Gazzing yourself doesn't count.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:51, Reply)

Logically
if you're not on here, then you're not going to read your gazzes. So there's no point in sending one.

It'd be like phoning your landline when you're on holiday.

This wasn't meant to read like I'm being a cunt to you. I'm not, but I can't be bothered to put it more politely. Sorry.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:56, Reply)

What a massive cunt.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:57, Reply)

OK, I was being rude to TGB
But you didn't have to worsen it by mentioning her huge vag.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:01, Reply)

That was too easy.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:03, Reply)

Yup
This material writes itself.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:03, Reply)

THAT'S NOT THE POINT.
You know nothing of women's needs.
( girlinthehole, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:58, Reply)

Neither do most women

(PsychoChomp, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 13:59, Reply)

*nods sagely*

( girlinthehole, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:00, Reply)

I suppose I could replace "women" with "people" there.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:09, Reply)

Womans needs are multitudinous and confusing

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:00, Reply)

Women's needs are special.

(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:00, Reply)

*belms*

( girlinthehole, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:02, Reply)

*licks window*
Just to show solidarity with a sister.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:04, Reply)

- who would prefer it if you showed solidarity with the window ...

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 28 Apr 2010, 15:03, Reply)

But you leave a message on my answerphone
then when I get back from my holiday I go "aww" as opposed to "What a massive cunt"
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:01, Reply)

Maybe
But if you were actually dead, then I'd have wasted my time.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:02, Reply)

You should still call though.
WON'T SOMEONE THINK OF THE GHOSTS?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:04, Reply)

This is very true
I apologise.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:05, Reply)

Who is this?

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:28, Reply)

I sent you gaz

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:32, Reply)

not really, jokes.
SNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORF!
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:43, Reply)

You didn't get mine? Then I must have gazzed someone else by mistake.
That's slightly worrying.
(Edmund has no idea what you mean, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 14:43, Reply)

Oh Edmund
You made my days here brilliant.

What happened to happily married, sprogged up professional doctor Medical_Male?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 15:51, Reply)

Yes, I reckon he was looking for a bit on the side.
Genuine, real life, happily-married doctor that he was...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 15:52, Reply)

Didn't he tell you to call him Ed?
Or was this some other b3talady...I've no idea anymore

How are you, sweetie?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 15:55, Reply)

Yeah he did
He said "or Dr Ed, as I'm known to my patients". I hope to GOD it was a joker and not the actual Edmund, but he didn't seem to play up to Ed laughs or anything. He just disappeared when we challenged him.

And I'm soooper, how's you?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 15:56, Reply)

Sad times.
I mean, I know it's not nice to mock nutters, but he did brighten the place up.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Wed 28 Apr 2010, 15:57, Reply)