my sister had a parrot that loved sunflower seeds
so much so that he binged on them and didn't eat anything else and had a little birdy heart attack. The vet said it was like 'eating a pat of butter a day'. Poor little parrot seed junkie.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:10, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

This made me officesmirk
Am I a bad person?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:11, Reply)

I giggled a bit too
after she'd stopped crying.

He was dead cute, can't remember what species he was but he was about the size of a sparrow. My sister called him Jasper...
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:15, Reply)

Then we're both a bit mean, I can live with that
Jasper's a nice name for a bird, better than Polly.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:16, Reply)

She thought it was hilarious
(the name pun, not the death, obviously)
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:18, Reply)

it's not bad
goes nicely with my plans to have a goose and a duck called Duck Norris and Goose Lee
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:20, Reply)

I had a pet goose when I was a teenager
my Dad suggested I call him Honky, which I did. It was only much later that I realised Dad's suggestion came from the fact that the goose was white.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:22, Reply)

Your Dad sounds fun
My Nan had geese, they were horrid little fuckers and shit everywhere. Still, one did go for my sister, so they're not all bad.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:24, Reply)

they were a bit evil
especially during nesting season and when they had babies. I was tasked one year with spiking all the eggs so we wouldn't get any more babies and there was an evil male goose who guarded the nest that they'd cunningly made in the brambles when the female wasn't there, so I had to try and get him away so I could spike the eggs. I got in a full on fight with him and eventually had to wrap a teatowel around his head and punch him to get him to chill the fuck out. I feel a bit bad about punching a goose, but he deserved it. Kitty 1 - Goose 0. Also, whippet 0 because she ran away as soon as the goose hissed at her.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:29, Reply)

You punched a goose in the head, I fucking LOVE this.

(Bazongaloid, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:30, Reply)

me too

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)

Haha, me three.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:39, Reply)

Four!

(berk, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:52, Reply)

Male geese = ganders
And that story rocks!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)

I thank you
I did have quite a cool upbringing. I revised for my GCSEs surrounded by 5 goslings who used to follow me everywhere. Luckily it was hot and I used to go and sit by the pond and they would swim whilst I learned about dull maths that I would never use again.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)

you are even cooler than I thought

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:27, Reply)

I know, right?
I also had a pet duck because when she was born her feet faced inwards so she fell over all the time and the other ducks bullied her. So I took her in and taught her to swim and to walk further without falling over. I called her Spacker the Quacker. I loved that duck. She got eaten by rats though.

Oh and my mum had Honky shot. Yes, seriously.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:30, Reply)

That was beautiful up until the last two sentences.

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)

indeed

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)

how do you think I felt?!
That was my baby, she used to sit on my shoulder and snuggle into my hair to go to sleep. My mum needed to get rid of the geese because there were 40+ of them, so one of the local farmers agreed to 'remove' them. When I asked if she had saved Honky she said no.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)

Isn't she just?
We should start a 'We All Nominate Kitty For A Certificate of Excellence' group.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:31, Reply)

I second the nomination

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:34, Reply)

Oh I like this very much.
Someone make me a badge, I've never had a badge!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)

I might do if struck by inspiration
But fear the Pandatron...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:46, Reply)

Gwan!

( girlinthehole, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)

I'll pander to you instead to distract the pandatron
If you made me a badge that would be awesome because you are very talented at photoshoppery and the like.

*engages...*
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:55, Reply)

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 14:03, Reply)

you beauty

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 14:04, Reply)

should I question the bukkake elements of it?

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 14:05, Reply)

Just accept it
It can't be that subtle, surely?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 14:06, Reply)

I thought the delicate shrinking of the word Of in the original conveyed your point in a wonderfully understated way

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 14:08, Reply)

I knew you'd get it
Thought many others would too!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 14:09, Reply)

I actually totally didn't get it
*BELM*
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 14:35, Reply)

I suspect the subtleties may have been missed by most

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)

TOO LATE

(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:57, Reply)

That is a fucking masterpiece.

( girlinthehole, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 13:59, Reply)

This is AWESOME!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 14:03, Reply)

genuine officelol
over here
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 14:05, Reply)

HAHAHAHAHA
This is one of the funniest things I've seen on this site.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 14:25, Reply)