Except I'm not blonde
Or the most beautiful creature that ever drew breath.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:25, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Yeah, but you're better looking than Arthur Miller.
Which is a start.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:28, Reply)

damning with faint praise there.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:29, Reply)

I'm slimmer than Bella Emberg too

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:31, Reply)

You're not as stupid as a rock either.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:31, Reply)

I'm going to get a big head soon

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:32, Reply)

Hurr hurr
*nudge nudge wink wink*
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:36, Reply)

Too right.
More men should put that on their dating profiles, 'I'm no Arthur Miller...'
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:30, Reply)

Or even Windy Miller.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:31, Reply)

I'm quite relieved to hear that you're not
Unicorns are gorgeous but I wouldn't want to fuck one
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:30, Reply)

Really?
I could well picture you doing the fandango with a unicorn
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:33, Reply)

I don't know a fandango
I could probably lead one into quite a dramatic Tango though

Yes I knew what you meant
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:37, Reply)

Yes, and well done

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:40, Reply)

I'm afraid I must disagree with you there
she's not the most beautiful creature who ever drew breath.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:30, Reply)

Look, I know she was a bottle blonde who could look ropey at times
but you have to admit she had something amazing and undefinable.
And I refer more to candid shots that show her prettiness and gentleness rather than those vile tacky glanourous pictures.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:32, Reply)

I'm not denying she was gorgeous
and I know what you mean about the candid shots. I'm sure I had someone more beautiful in mind, but I'll be damned if I can remember who....
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:35, Reply)

the bird who played Electra in World Is Not Enough
man I'd turn gay for that in a second.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:47, Reply)

Really?
Sophie Marceau?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:49, Reply)

that is not a good photo of her
despite being thick as two short planks, I'd probably have to say that Kelly Brook is possibly the most gorgeous creature I've seen.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:53, Reply)

this is a much better photo
(slightly NSFW due to nipple)
www.la-star.com/p/pics/sophie-marceau/sophie-marceau-20070525-261103.jpg
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:59, Reply)

Much better pic

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:00, Reply)

indeed

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:01, Reply)

She was a slag, you could tell,
that's why she was popular.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:35, Reply)

No better than Jordan really

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:36, Reply)

Fuck right off right
because Marilyn was lovely and Jordan's nasty
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:37, Reply)

Marilyn could be a diva bitch when she wanted.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:38, Reply)

Not like Jordan and well you know it

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:40, Reply)

The best Jordan's managed is a few crap pop stars
Marilyn aimed for the top
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:41, Reply)

I knew that'd get a rise

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:39, Reply)

There's nothing anyone could say to make me hate her
Even the fact that she went with other people's oosbands. Which is on top for sure.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:41, Reply)

Well she was more charming.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:38, Reply)

She was a bit of a goer
but she knew no better
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:37, Reply)

I think we'd all like the chance to say we'd fucked the President of the United States

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:38, Reply)

You would
Cos you've got pictures of Barack in his grundies all over your khazi
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:42, Reply)

They're getting harder and harder to come by (hehe)
For some reason getting close to him to take pictures is a lot more difficult than it used to be. He's changed, man *looks wistful*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:45, Reply)

You'll always have that weekend break in Kenya

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:53, Reply)

I still can't sit down comfortably when I go on Safari

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:57, Reply)

I'm sure that's what the chairman of BP is thinking right now.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:45, Reply)

^POTD

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:46, Reply)

I'd fuck Martin Sheen.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:48, Reply)

a tin
(PsychoChomp, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:53, Reply)

Shines umpteen things clean

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:59, Reply)

that would sting a bit, surely.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:01, Reply)

Sometimes the tingly lube isn't enough
And I always run out of hotsauce.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:04, Reply)

*sings*
looking for some hotsauce baby this evening, I need some hotsauce baby tonight
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:18, Reply)

Look, I know your beard's quite impressive, but you're getting a little vain, aren't you?

(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:33, Reply)

my beard is more than quite impressive these days

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:35, Reply)

Specifics please
Beards by definition can only ever be quite impressive unless you add some crazy shit, like one of those amazing curly moustaches or some pyrotechnics
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:40, Reply)

it's about 5 inches long and pointed
I'm trying to find some beads to go in it or something.

burning fuses perhaps
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:40, Reply)

Fnar

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:42, Reply)

I would say you'll be easy to spot at Sonisphere
But it's a metal festival...
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:46, Reply)

yeah, I kind of blend right in
I'll probably be wearing a straw cowboy hat if it's sunny.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:48, Reply)

Oh I hope so
It'll give me a defence against the immediate accusations of bumdering
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 11:53, Reply)

it won't
it's a manly, straight hat
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:01, Reply)

Those two hat descriptions are inherently self-contradictory
Good point though, I can't expect to maintain my awesome hairstyle in a field. I need to think about which hats I own that are both quite cool and easily replaceable. Slayer are playing. No hat that goes into a Slayer Pit comes out alive
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:07, Reply)

not at all
definitely manly and straight
sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc1/hs160.snc1/5980_136149281888_754656888_2465071_609059_n.jpg
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:13, Reply)

Epic pictoral proof of manliness of headgear fail

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:22, Reply)

you are in no position to comment on the manliness of photos

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:24, Reply)

Improved
Much Better
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:34, Reply)

haha

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:49, Reply)

I'm on the internet
The perfect position to judge people on anything ever, with or without justification
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:41, Reply)

good point

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 12:50, Reply)