yay, he agreed?
that's brilliant.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 14:34, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

Yeah!!
I hope he can arrange something with the new job if he gets it (I know our current boss won't have any problem)

Then he's going to sell his house and buy half of my flat, and with that money I can finally afford going away.

I'm still trying to convince him to go for a year, but I've done pretty well, considering that he wanted to go for 2 weeks :)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 14:51, Reply)

I tried to persuade Wiggy that we should buy a boat and go and live in the Bahamas.
He didn't agree, he said he's happy where he is, sadface.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 14:54, Reply)

what a loser
I'll come with you. I can sail and everything.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 14:56, Reply)

really?
My dad is going to teach me how to sail, I'm so excited. I've been reading all about sloops.

To be fair on Wiggy, he's doing pretty well in his career, whereas I'm bored out of my head, so it's unfair of me to expect him to drop everything, I just want to do something exciting with my life rather than wait until I'm retired to do it all.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 14:59, Reply)

I share your pain, sister
Ay, I wish he wasn't doing so well and we both could sell our places and move to the Caribbean and live the good live.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:00, Reply)

learn to sail and pass some crew qualifications then you can
a friend of mine used to crew a 66 foot yacht for a rich banker, yacht was based in Antigua. She used to get paid considerably more than I do (as a civil engineer) tax free, had no accomodation costs and could use the bankers money to buy diving gear and windsurfers etc. for them to play with.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:03, Reply)

I've read about people going around the world and skippering ships here and there
some guy I read about became a boat deliverer based in the Bahamas. *jealouses*
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:04, Reply)

you need to have some connections I guess
my friend used to row competitively (and has family who were big sailors near southampton) and she wangled a position crewing the support boat for the cross atlantic rowing race (the one where fogel and cracknell were naked)

she ended up in Antigua and through contacts got a job on this bankers boat. then the old skipper got fired and she got her boyfriend the skipper job.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:06, Reply)

I think my dad has some connections
albeit of the crew side of things rather than the rich people side. I've heard that it's possible to do it by sailing a lot and getting to know the fellow sailors in ports, or in large canals where they have a pilot, etc.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:22, Reply)

Then
What are you waiting for?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:24, Reply)

For Wiggy to get excited about it and go "hell yeah let's go"
Also, the sensible side of me suggests I should finish at least one degree in my life!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:25, Reply)

Again
It sounds like a brilliant plan, but I get sea sick.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:06, Reply)

yeah
aside from the past few years I've been sailing all my life. my dad is a compulsive boat buyer. I think he's had about 15 different ones in my lifetime.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:01, Reply)

awesome.
I was looking at sailing lessons but they're well expensive and then I thought hang on, Dad's a master mariner. BELM
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:03, Reply)

lessons are probably conducted by awful cunts as well
better to learn from family or friends.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:04, Reply)

that's what I thought
I'd be ever so nervous if I was being yelled at by some guy, whereas my dad would be much kinder if I made mistakes. Although he gets annoyed when I worry about breaking my nails. If I was actually going to get a boat I think I'd have to have them removed first, sadface.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:05, Reply)

my main piece of advice to you would be to turn back long before you get bored
because you then have to go through the sailing back part, the mooring up part, the tidying away, and then if you are unlucky, the rowing to shore part.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:07, Reply)

duly noted.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:18, Reply)

Neither joke nor euphonium -
do you know the Cockle family, Exeter sailors?
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:04, Reply)

I do not

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:05, Reply)

Very sadface
I'd love to go and live somewhere like there, have a little shop selling coconut milkshake and enjoying the sunshine everyday.

You could have your boat and use it to give expensive tours to pink stupid tourists.

And BGB could cook nice pasta salads with fresh fish and we'd sell them in the little coconut shop as well.

Who needs a man.

... me :((
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 14:58, Reply)

That's what I want to do
I want to learn to dive and then go and then go and do it somewhere beautiful. I want to own a cocktail bar on a beach. Like in Cocktail.

Wiggy said he wants to do all that too, but he pictures it a long time in the future, whereas I want to do it while I'm still youthful and exuberant.

I wouldn't want to do any of it without him though, so I'll have to keep it in my dreams unfortunately.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:02, Reply)

Yep
I wouldn't be happy there without him. He doesn't even want to do it in the future. He likes Manchester and its weather.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:08, Reply)

Wiggy says he does want to emigrate eventually
but that he's happy at the moment, so I'm pretty much stuck here. I'm not unhappy as such, it's just I've always said since I was a teenager that my worst fear is to wake up when I'm 50 and realise I haven't done anything with my life.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:17, Reply)

Mark wants to emigrate as well
But he's too scared of leaving all the good things and friends he's got here. He'd love to live somewhere else, but can't think of risking anything.

We made another deal. We spend another 2 years in England, learning French (and he finishing learning Spanish), and then we find a job in France, Spain, South Africa or South America and live there for a while.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:26, Reply)

that's a good deal
I can't get much out of Wiggy. We said we want to emigrate, but I want Australia and he wants Canada. It's quite difficult to talk to him about it as he doesn't disagree with me unless I really force it out of him.

The only thing that would worry me about upping and leaving is that I would have to leave my friends behind, but with Facebook and stuff it's so easy to stay in contact.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:30, Reply)

And imagine the parties when they come to see you!
I know, the worst way of saying "no" is with a "well, maybe", because you can't argue, but you know it means "no".

Maybe you can find somewhere in between? TBH, I'd rather go to New Zealand than Australia, and in the south of NZ it can be pretty cold in winter (summer), if that's what he likes.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:39, Reply)

That's the thing, he doesn't like the cold,
and I hate the cold, but he says Canada's not cold (lies). I have no desire to move to Canada, but then he has no desire to move to Australia, so it's kind of a stalemate. We've said we'll go to both countries on holiday and then try and decide afterwards, but I don't think I'm going to change my mind as the weather and activities in Aus are a huge part of it for me, so if he feels the same about Canada then we're going to be no better off.

We had a row about it at the weekend because I was saying to him that of all these things I come up with for us to do with our lives, he never says "oh hell yes, I really want to do that!" so I'm always disheartened by it because I feel like I'm the only one who wants to actually do anything when he's happy to just stagnate where he is. I've been brought up by a family who travels around a lot and has had adventures, whereas his family have lived in the house they're in now for most of their lives and granny lives down the road, etc. This is exactly the kind of life I want to avoid.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:48, Reply)

It sounds hard
(You can tell him from me that Canada IS cold)

Maybe he's just a bit scared and as soon as he starts moving you won't be able to stop him. Has his office other offices in other parts of the world? Maybe he can get an assignment, even if it's only in Europe, but it's a good start. That's how Mark started to think about moving, after 3 months working in Brussels.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:54, Reply)

I thought about that, he's working for a huge bank so it's possible.
I think he wants to get to certain stage in his career where he can go freelance for lots of money, so he would only need to work a certain amount of time over the year, the rest of the time we could do what we want. That I would be happy with.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:59, Reply)

That sounds like a great plan
And a good middle point for both of you. How long does he think he'll need to get it all sorted?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:00, Reply)

Sorry, was at the bank.
It's a few years away methinks, he's working his way up at the moment. I feel like time is just rushing by at the moment which is compounding the problem, it seems like this year has flown and I worry that I'll suddenly realise I'm 35 and it's too late.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:41, Reply)

Yes, I've been feeling like that lately
35 doesn't have to be too late, but all depends on what you want. If you want a family then it probably is :(

If you don't want a family it should be ok.

I first moved from Spain when I was 25, and now after 5 years in England I feel like my blood is boiling, calling for another move.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:45, Reply)

Yeah I think that's my problem
I have restless blood. My dad's been all over the world, to almost every country. He lived in Malta when he was younger and he's got the best stories. I want to have stories.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:49, Reply)

My parents never travelled much
Us living in the Canary Islands and all the family in mainland Spain meant that all our holidays were always to Barcelona and Sevilla, which are good, but you get a bit tired of them after 25 years. I felt as if my family was robbing me of the opportunity to discover the world when I was at my best; that I had to move around and see as much as I could.

There is always someone tying me back. My family mainly, but right now it seems like nobody can force me to anything. I want to travel as much as possible before having kids, and then travel more.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:52, Reply)

yeah me too
I want to try and fit as much in as possible before I have kids. I hope I don't resent them!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 16:55, Reply)

I'm going to make them travel like mad!
I think they'll end up just wanting to stay in a place for holidays :)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 17:01, Reply)

OMG! I want this bad.
Not the man, the cooking of pasta salads somewhere warm and relaxing.
( girlinthehole, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:02, Reply)

if you cook the pasta
the men will come.

(no, not like that. Filth.)
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:06, Reply)

If I cook the pasta then everyone will get fat.
I always cook too much pasta.
( girlinthehole, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:07, Reply)

We'll sell it expensive
British-Italian delicatessen.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:09, Reply)

And cous cous salads.
I do a mean cous cous salad too.
( girlinthehole, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:09, Reply)

I'm getting all excited already
I could help preparing a few tapas, if the milkshakes don't work.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 15:31, Reply)