I'm about to stagger into work
Where I suspect I shall have to answer questions about my facial injuries.

Quick, everyone, I need an explanation that doesn't make me sound like a massive alkie.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 8:08, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Tell them you fell asleep in the garden with bacon on your face
and a possum came and ate it, carelessly injuring you in the process.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 8:21, Reply)

it could happen
and "possum" sounds cuter than "rat".
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 8:25, Reply)

A fox did it.

(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Mon 28 Jun 2010, 8:35, Reply)

I got that Saxon DVD at long last.
It's actually brilliant, as well as the documentary itself you get a full length show from '81, another one from '08 and loads of other stuff.

Do you like the way I am feebly trying to make spending £28 on a DVD and then having to wait 4 months for delivery seem like a sound purchase?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 8:37, Reply)

Saxon? Really?
The variety of your musical tastes never ceases to amaze me
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 8:42, Reply)

As long as you can justify it to yourself after that long
I would probably have given up, forgotten about it, then broken down in uncontrollable tears when it finally arrived.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 8:43, Reply)

Saxon?
Good lord.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:09, Reply)

It's fucking hilarious.
The stories of the Bomber tour with Motorhead are really, really entertaining. Their horror at Motorhead's antics is palpable. They were wide-eyed, clean-living tea drinkers from Barnsley and they really had no idea what they were in for.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:19, Reply)

I find pictures of Biff from the early 80s hilarious,
he's got a massive head and a tiny scrawny body and arms.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:20, Reply)

They wore some truly appalling outfits back then, too.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:24, Reply)

Tell them you got drunk on expensive red wine
Before falling off (and breaking) the chair you were sat on, going face first into the floor?

Hang on...
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 8:55, Reply)

That fails the "massive alkie" part
but it's good to know what happened...
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 9:08, Reply)

i think you should stress the expensive wine part
it makes you sound like a better class of massive alkie
( plentyofants more ghee, vicar?, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 10:27, Reply)