After all the lovely goodbyes and FB friend requests...
how annoyed would you be if I told you my new work's firewall is shithouse?

Also; a lobster which spoke with a dicey caribbean accent
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 15:58, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Hello!!
How are you doing? How is the new job? Interesting? Challenging? Exciting?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:00, Reply)

Disappointing
Turns out they're downsizing the department and only want me until September 30th. I found this out this morning. On my first day in the office
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:02, Reply)

that sucks cock
not unlike yourself.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:04, Reply)

Missed you too baby

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:12, Reply)

This morning I did feel a slight twinge of sadness when I realised you hadn't posted
thus meaning your job probably had a wall of fire.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:27, Reply)

Careful, Kitty
That's almost a compliment. You'll be SHUNNED
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:34, Reply)

What?
That's crap? They should have told you before you resigned from the other job!

What are you going to do?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:06, Reply)

Work hard and apply for one of the new jobs being created
whilst also consulting the Citizens' Advice Bureau about whether or not I should be entitled to get paid the full length of my contract (6 months).

And abuse the internet facilities in a guilt-free fashion
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:08, Reply)

It all sounds good
I think you should claim all the salary, yes. They should have told you in advance.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:16, Reply)

Damn straight
If I get any of it without having to work for it I'm going to hire myself some prostitutes to help me celebrate
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:19, Reply)

Me! Me! Me!
I'm cheap and clean!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:26, Reply)

Define cheap
clean is less of a concern, you won't be by the end of it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:34, Reply)

Stick with it.
Be the best you can be, impress the hell out of them and you never know.
Perhaps the downsizing won't be quite so bad.
Keep your pecker up and smile.

Love

Pollyanna.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:09, Reply)

That is more or less the plan
and if my work ethic fails to impress them, you make a good point about my pecker.

Thanks for the encouragement mate
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:13, Reply)

He was a CRAB

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:02, Reply)

Whatever Bill

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:03, Reply)

Oh, don't get me started on Bill
but seriously, The Little Mermaid is one of my favourite films of all time. Sebastian is a Crab, definitely not a lobster.

I had an argument with an ex a few years back about this, I very much proved her wrong
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:05, Reply)

Good for you sir
and I apologise for being wrong about Disney. It is punishable by death in some countries
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:06, Reply)

You know how much I like you
But I'd give you that punishment if it was on my hand. The Little Mermaid. It should be studied at school!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:07, Reply)

This^
I know every word to every song, and may or may not have danced around in my pants while singing 'Under the Sea' on the Disney Singstar game
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:10, Reply)

What is it about men with beards?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:14, Reply)

Eh?

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:29, Reply)

Haven't you got a beard?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:34, Reply)

No.

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:56, Reply)

oh em gee

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:16, Reply)

I have an 8 year old daughter
that's my excuse, and I'm sticking to it
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:29, Reply)

sleeping beauty is my favorite
I was once an 8 year old girl, that's my excuse
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:37, Reply)

It's shit
Aurora is one of the crappest disney princesses ever
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:54, Reply)

YOU SHUT YOUR FUCKING FACE

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:59, Reply)

Pfffft
what sort of a name for a prince is 'Phillip' anyway?

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 17:23, Reply)

Me too, me too!
But in Spanish, obviously, and with a very strong mexican accent, as in the age of The Little Mermaid we got all our Hollywood films translated into Spanish by the Mexicans.

Bajo del mar, bajo del mar...
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:19, Reply)

That sounds awesome!
I may have to learn the spanish version, and totally salsa it up
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:30, Reply)

Harsh
You could at least grant me a last request. Warning; you won't like it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:11, Reply)

Mmmm... I don't know
I can grant you your last words.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:20, Reply)

I'm unlikely to agree to being killed if there's no pre-execution bang-bang

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:35, Reply)

death by snoo-snoo!!

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:50, Reply)

Newofficelol
Points!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:53, Reply)

Who would discuss about it?
He's clearly a crab. He looks like a crab. And the cheff keeps calling him crab all the time.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:07, Reply)

You have greatly over-estimated the intelligence of my former partners
they think that because he's red he must be a Lobster.

Idiots.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:09, Reply)

Plus, he does make references to the evil Mobster Lobster.
So the word and the voice become associated whereas he probably doesn't say much about crabs. Or summat.
(Cave Duck, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:16, Reply)

I'd forgotten about Mobster Lobster!
I'm taking over this rock, see?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:29, Reply)

Yeah, I can't decide whether to start a "Cartoon Characters You Fancy" or a "Great Cartoon Villians " thread.
What do you think?
(Cave Duck, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:34, Reply)

do both
that's what Alt Qs are for.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:50, Reply)

OOOH, look who's back
*clears throat*
*hoists horse out of formaldehyde*

++BUMDER ALERT. BUMDER ALERT. JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT IT WAS SAFE TO GET OUT OF YOUR ARMOURED UNDERPANTS, THE BUMDER IS BACK, REPEAT: THE BUMDER IS BACK. BE DOUBLY VIGILANT AS HIS CAREFULLY STAGED FAUX-DEPARTURE MAY HAVE LULLED YOUR CATFLAPS INTO A FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY. YES, IT WAS NICE TO LIVE WITHOUT FEAR OF THE BUMDER FOR A FEW DAYS, BUT HE IS BACK. HE HAS BEEN SIGHTED BUMDERING AROUND THIS THREAD LIKE THE GREAT BIG MINCING BUM-PLUNDERER HE IS. BUMDER ALERT, BUMDER ALERT. BACKS BACK AGAINST THE WALL. BUMDER ALERT.++
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:16, Reply)

*sighs theatrically*
I wish I didn't find this quite so bloody funny. But I do. Damn you, Crowsephine!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:18, Reply)

You'd miss it if it wasn't there.
In the same way that I've missed having someone to abuse on a regular basis. Welcome back, you big bumder!
*hugs*
*backs away to press rear end against heavy-duty optical bench*
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:20, Reply)

*hugs*
*attempts to grope*
*discovers electrocuted trousers*

Well played, sir
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:36, Reply)

And its STILL funny cos of the mind's Holly voice. Oh dear.

(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 6 Jul 2010, 16:19, Reply)