You cannot diffuse my anger!
I'm going on a boat this weekend. Got my flippy floppies.

Unfortunately, aforementioned douchebag will be there so I'm not looking forward to it any more.

Wiggy's supposed to be fixing my bike so I can join bike club. I've been stealing his to ride to work on this week and it's been terrifying.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:15, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Hit the douchebag with your flippy floppies

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:17, Reply)

I really hope thats a nick name for her lung hammers.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:17, Reply)

what's a lung hammer?
is it a fish?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:21, Reply)

BREASTS

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:32, Reply)

BREASTS

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:33, Reply)

BREASTS

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:43, Reply)

BREASTS?!

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:46, Reply)

there these things, soft and juicy you've got when you look down
on a plate of KFC.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:49, Reply)

mmmm KFC
Someone emailed my friend on facebook today with the message "I like your face, hair and breasts"

Was it you?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:51, Reply)

I like KFC
And breasts.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:03, Reply)

enough to email a stranger to tell them about it?

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:06, Reply)

No
I am a gent, I would send a telegram first, presenting myself and asking permission if I could message them through Facebook.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:07, Reply)

Would you be wearing your top hat and tails from the other day?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:09, Reply)

But of course!
And as I bow with a flourish, I'd leave a dust trail from the hat.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:11, Reply)

I told the girl in question and she would like to meet you

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:14, Reply)

That's surprising!
Wait, does she want to meet me to say "That's the one, Officer!"
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:16, Reply)

I would giggle coyly and curtsey in return
And if you were really lucky, I might not just flash my ankles...but a bit of shin as well!
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:16, Reply)

slut

(PsychoChomp, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:17, Reply)

How DARE you!
If you do not apologise post-haste, I shall have to defend the lady's honour and demand reparations!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:20, Reply)

Rapiers at dawn!

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:21, Reply)

Indeed, m'lady
To first blood?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:22, Reply)

Of course.
I am most concerned for thy safety, but give him a good thrashing, yeah?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:32, Reply)

The rapscallion is in for a swift exsanguination
When it comes to the noble art of fencing, I am second to none!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:40, Reply)

oh fuck off.
I wasn't flashing them at you. If you really want to be involved in this role play, I suppose we can draft you in as Jack The Ripper.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:20, Reply)

pahahaha
I'm totally picturing him with a cape and a top hat and a twirly moustache like the bad guy out of silent films
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:21, Reply)

Tying a helpless Applebite to railroad tracks.

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:23, Reply)

Haha!
But who will come to my rescue seconds before the train arrives?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:30, Reply)

I shall, m'lady!
Fear not!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:39, Reply)

The whole thing is a bit LARPy for me.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:23, Reply)

You'll give me palpitations!
Verily you shall put me to an early grave, albeit with a smile on my face!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:19, Reply)

Oh dear sir!
You do flatter me so. Have this silken handkerchief as a token of luck for the upcoming duel with that dastardly psychochomp.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:29, Reply)

I shall treasure it always, m'lady
You do me a great honour!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 16:30, Reply)

have you got a nautical themed pashmina afghan?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:18, Reply)

not yet
never thought I'd be on a boat
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:23, Reply)

remember to take a good hard look

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:23, Reply)

sadface
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:18, Reply)

you don't scare me now that we've entered into the gift giving pact
Now you're my weird-gift giving buddy.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:22, Reply)

Splendid!

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:22, Reply)

unless you send me one of your severed toes or something
that would bump me right back to scared
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:23, Reply)

I need all my toes, you creep.

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:26, Reply)

no one needs all their toes
what do you do that requires all 11?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:31, Reply)

cheeky scamp, I only have 3

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:32, Reply)

are you a pigeon?

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:37, Reply)

If I were you I'd leave the douchebag at home and take T-Pain instead.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:22, Reply)

he does do some nice vocoder style harmonies it must be said

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:23, Reply)

T-Pain and GlaDOS, sitting in a tree

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:24, Reply)

and be On A Boat, Motherfucker!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:23, Reply)

Oh god why didn't I think of this,
I can just tell him we're taking T Pain instead.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:23, Reply)

Do it
and video it

then recreate the song while you are on the boat
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:29, Reply)

there are so many recreations of that video
but I have yet to see a canal boat one.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:31, Reply)

there's your niche
I'm totally going to have to listen to it when I get home.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:32, Reply)

Just in case you're still cross,
you may enjoy this headline foreshadowing Darth's forthcoming running adventures.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:31, Reply)

hahaha
also, I haven't used the term cross for ages, I like saying it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 9 Jul 2010, 15:40, Reply)