well
if the kid is living with the 'woman' I suggest you tuckle off down to the Early Learning Centre and buy cymbals, a triangle, and basically anything that can be banged together to make a noise, lots of noise.

Alternatively one of those pull along duck toys that quacks as it trundles along went down an absolute storm with my nephew and it was about a fiver
(Halfy By light alone, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 10:50, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Ha! Fisher Price "My First Air-Horn"
a bit young for a vuvuzela
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 10:52, Reply)

my 9 month old made his own vuvzela
so 2 is not too young for it.
( ascorbate, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 10:54, Reply)

He sounds like an evil genius in the making
you'd better start saving for that underground lair he's gonna need.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 10:57, Reply)

yup
definitely evil, not so sure about the genius aspect.
( ascorbate, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 11:11, Reply)

Ha!
I've already bought her a recorder, harmonica, tambourine and a xylophone, and bless her she loves them. I've seen a toddler's drumkit and she'll have it for Xmas....
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 10:55, Reply)

excellent work!

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 10:59, Reply)

The recorder was a particularly spiteful choice, I thought.
I shall be encouraging her to take up the violin as soon as she is old enough, too. And the fucking bagpipes.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 11:04, Reply)

get her a mellotron
they can make ears bleed
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 11:23, Reply)

Good man
surprisingly enough you can get them just about anything and they will love it, if its plastic, makes a noise and has things to press, pull, poke and fiddle with then its a great toy.

Just wait until she is about 9 then it starts getting difficult. Unless you buy her a pony
(Halfy By light alone, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 11:01, Reply)

Then what about when she's 10?

( Bats, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 11:17, Reply)

condoms and makeup
kids are starting earlier and earlier
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 11:21, Reply)

that is incredibly bleak.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 12 Jul 2010, 11:41, Reply)