Get a piece of card
About A1 size, and an easel. You'll also need a telescopic-pointy-thing, and to wear some serious business specs, and tie your hair back.

On the card write the following:

1. People like cupcakes.
2. People like girls and hinted mild lesbianism, or at the least 'experimentation'.
3. QED people will buy cupcakes if you hint that two girls copped off near the pudding bowl.
4. ?????
5. Profit.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 9:48, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

4. Viral video of 2 Girls 1 Cupcake!

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 9:48, Reply)

Exactamundo!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 9:49, Reply)

You also need to be wearing a grey pinstriped jacket that is slightly too small for you
so that your breasts are clearly straining against the material.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 9:49, Reply)

I see you've been attending my sales and marketing courses
attending hiding behind the coffee machine wanking during
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 9:51, Reply)

My breasts don't strain :(
they sit quietly.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 9:53, Reply)

For some reason I now have a Shakira song stuck in my head

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 9:54, Reply)

Mine are indeed small and humble as well
they're not smug like Vipros'
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:02, Reply)

You can borrow mine.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 9:59, Reply)

Why?
Did the baby rip them off in a fit of rage?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:00, Reply)

Top strainage.
Hardly any of my clothes fit anymore.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:07, Reply)

Excuse to buy new clothes
I'm sure Catface is hating it.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:08, Reply)

I bet you Catface has tried her milk.

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:10, Reply)

No money for new clothes.
*SADFACE*
We spent all the money on making the kitchen habitable so now I have to dress in rags. But the kitchen looks lovely.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:10, Reply)

I bet you can train Catface to sew
get him to make you new clothes
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:12, Reply)

He can use all those balls of wool that he normally just plays with on the floor.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:14, Reply)

Yay! Free milk!

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:02, Reply)

There's totally a photo of your breasts on facebook
unfortunately there is a baby stuck to them. It looks very happy.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:03, Reply)

Aye, you can see A WHOLE INCH of NEKKID FLESH ZOMG
if your retinas don't get burnt out first by the dazzling pastiness.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:07, Reply)

It's alright, you're shading it with an umberella-ella-ella
Have you had anyone give you shit for breast feeding in public yet? I pity the first fool to try that.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:10, Reply)

not yet,
but I'll be fighting the urge to spray them in the face when they do
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 16 Aug 2010, 10:20, Reply)