The first person
I see when I walk onto Shoreditch High St, or the first person riding a fixie on the way.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:40, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Fixed gear bike?
A couple of my friends were ranting about those. I just didn't understand the hatred :(
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:41, Reply)

Imagine buying a loaf of bread
and all you've got is a middle slice, then wondering why you run out of energy walking up a hill.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:45, Reply)

I guess I should just go and rent one of these bikes and teach myself.
I could use the fresh air* and exercise.

*though I will be outside for roughly a week starting Wednesday
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:48, Reply)

You tried one of the Barclays bikes yet?
Even they are more efficient; you'd need a comparison for the fixie though. I'd lend you my bike, but you're 5ft ish and it probably wouldn't fit.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:53, Reply)

5' 3", I'm quite small
Heightwise, at least. I just never got round to learning to ride a bike.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:56, Reply)

You don't know how to ride a bike?
Definitely not lending you my ride now!
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:58, Reply)

I wouldn't deprive you!
I guess London's not the best place to try and learn.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:00, Reply)

Nah, do it in Battersea Park
You'll be fine! Just wait till you can rent one from Boris soon.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:01, Reply)

Or my local one.
Which is Burgess Park.

I have the impression that's NOT a good idea.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:02, Reply)

Well, as long as you learn to use the brakes
Before going too close to any of the more abrupt geographical features round there. Or, indeed, the pond.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:05, Reply)

I've not been there yet.
I go past it on the bus (when I don't fall out of it) and it looks a little scary. I'm trying to drag FHSP out to the lido at the Serpentine, but she's having none of it.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:07, Reply)

Oh, it's quite nice to walk round.
Not London's finest park, but pleasant enough.

My first visit was tarnished slightly as I sat by the pond and observed the family sat on the opposite bank, as the small children wandered curiously near the pond and their ghastly angry manatee of a mother repeatedly yelled at them to "GERRAWAY FROM THE FAKKIN' WA'ER! I WON'T FAKKIN' TELL YOU AGAIN! ROAR! WOBBLE! ROAR! ANGRYCHAVJIGGLE! ROAR!*"

*_{Latter onomatopoeic noises may be an exaggeration}
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:13, Reply)

Oh, I might check that out in a couple of weeks.
And hopefully September will come through with some nice weather.

Are there ducks?!
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:15, Reply)

There are.
Ducks make everything better. (Especially when the problem is an absence of ducks)

For the best selection of waterfowl, and, indeed myriad crows, however, I recommend going to St James' Park.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:22, Reply)

Aren't they scared off by the footballers?
Or are we talking about a different one?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:27, Reply)

But Burgess is walking distance
I might have some park based shenanigans for my birthday. Or Soho Square based ones.
Oh excellent, actual birthday is on a Candybox night. Sounds like fun.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:29, Reply)

Backwards evolution
For about 1% increase in efficiency you have to keep your legs going. You may as well ride a penny farthing.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:45, Reply)

I DO ride a penny farthing.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:28, Reply)

They're fucking stupid.
I broke my mate's £1500 one borrowing it without asking to do a beer run. I just put in back in the hall and said nothing.

/going to hell
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:48, Reply)

I would have just chucked it in the canal
and said a bear mugged me. Much better all round.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:50, Reply)

Tricksy fucking bears

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:57, Reply)

Well if you will insist on going to the horror that is Shoreditch...
EMO INVASION GONNA GET YOU!
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:43, Reply)

I work right on the edge Beckyletters
It's fairly impossible not to go :(
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:46, Reply)

There aren't any emos in Shoreditch, that I've seen.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:47, Reply)

Arrrrgh you've turned into one of them. They can never recognise their own kind :(
There's fucking loads everytime I go there
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:50, Reply)

They aren't emos
They're Hoxton Heroes and Indy Cindys. Get it right! You're too old for this shit!
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:54, Reply)

Hoxton Heroes and Indy Cindys Pretentious Insufferable Cunts
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:55, Reply)

Abbreviating to PrICs?

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:02, Reply)

Ooh, very nice. That hadn't occurred to me, but it does fit very well.

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:03, Reply)

Magnificent

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:09, Reply)

Do like
I shall adopt it immediately.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:14, Reply)

I never had you down as having a liking for Hadouken!
It took me until being IN Hoxton that they weren't American.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:57, Reply)

I'm a member of their
fan club and everything :)
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:59, Reply)

Wut.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:00, Reply)

Yup, if I was home I'd
show you my lanyard and badge and everything.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:01, Reply)

...for the love of god WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY?!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:03, Reply)

I used to send out the tickets for their fanclub
I had to sign up to the website to test it.

/oldjobtrufax
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:04, Reply)

Oh. I see.
I thought you did it because you LIKED the fuckers.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:08, Reply)

I don't think the band is that bad
they're on a couple of my spotify playlists.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:15, Reply)

There are wall-to-wall fashion benders in Shoreditch
but I've only seen emos en masse in Camden.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:55, Reply)

Image ref
Shoreditch Wanker thisisbandit.com/wp-content/hipster.jpg

Emo exclaim.ca/images/up-emo.jpg
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 11:59, Reply)

Haha the Shoreditch wanker pic is priceless

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:00, Reply)

Pretty good one right?
Got everything - shit beards, shit tattoos, shit faux retro shit clothing, shit moustaches, shit ironic t-shirt, shit lens-less glasses.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:03, Reply)

It's all there.
All the things I loathe about my area.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:09, Reply)

I've got a spare assault rifle
when the time comes I'll let you know and you can come too!
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:11, Reply)

I prefer to use my swords. I like to see their eyes as I slay them.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:29, Reply)

Oooh, sometimes I forget I have a war axe lurking somewhere at my parents'.
And a morningstar, although experiments with that when I was a youngster suggest that some training might be in order before I try to use it in anger.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:31, Reply)

My brother's best pal at secondary school
badly injured my big toe with a home-made morning star. Nails and Fimo, it was.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:39, Reply)

Fucking hell
Two utter dickheads next to some girl with terrible tattoos.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:02, Reply)

Don't forget scene kids, either

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:08, Reply)

Wheee
2.bp.blogspot.com/_KZ5qdgu3avM/Sewp3AEDQwI/AAAAAAAABNI/0JSwJ6xIqJA/s400/Scene+kids1.jpg
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Mon 23 Aug 2010, 12:09, Reply)