Or remembered to wear more than just a towel first thing in the morning...

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:43, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

it's more in the middle of the night
if i run out to get a bottle of evian or something thinking "it's ok, it's dark" and then completely forget that when i open the fridge door it will be like standing in a spotlight. i have probably devalued their flat by about 30,000.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:44, Reply)

Evian? EVIAN?
You're forgetting your northern roots; it's a bucket of rainwater that was collected three weeks ago and has now gone slightly green or nowt, lass.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:47, Reply)

when i am up north
i will drink tap water or the filtered stuff (my dad has one of those plumbed in fridges). but in london there is no chance, it has got to be evian, fuck that filtered through 9 other people's kidneys shit!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:49, Reply)

You're northern and therefore, by proxy, 'ard as fookin' nails, lass.
You should be bypassing the 9 times filtered shite and simply drinking the piss of tramps as a matter of course anyway.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:52, Reply)

plumbed in fridges?
Down my way, we call that a cistern.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:53, Reply)

After the last Manchester bash
I had my first taste of Manchester water for several months. It was the sweetest thing ever.

Of course it might have been because I was horrifically dehydrated and still a little drunk and ashamed. But I still maintain it was the water itself.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:57, Reply)

Or clean your own gaff!
Swipe is Baroness Scotland AIC another FP
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:45, Reply)

i am shit at cleaning
i am allergic to dust and terrified of spiders.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:48, Reply)

What's your personal hygiene like?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:51, Reply)

slightly obsessive
and i am very obsessed with designer products and perfumes. it is probably where most of my salary goes.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:52, Reply)

Good to noe that you ain't no stinky bird
Obsession with names of clothes is a bit shit; it's like a tax on stupidity
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:55, Reply)

Where as I know fuck all about law
But I'm a dab hand with a can of Pledge and a duster.

1-1

Actually, I don't mind spiders at all, and I like to catch Daddy-longlegs by hand.

2-1 to the DogFucker.

In your face proper education and career prospects!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:52, Reply)

daddy long legs
make me whimper with fear. it's pathetic. but i hate the way they fly straight at you and get their horrid long legs tangled in your hair. urgh.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:53, Reply)

But if you cup them in your hands
They flap about a bit, then stop. Meaning you can open a window and release them back into the wild, so they can do whatever it is they do.

I'm pretty sure the life-span of the Long legs is 'Born, eat, shag, die'. 24 hours well spent.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:55, Reply)

you collected any fps from your numerous claims?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:49, Reply)

No, I'm passing them onto my bank.
I'm hoping they'll accept them as payment against my overdraft.

A few more thousand claimed fivers and I'll be back in credit!

I might take this to Dragons' Den. What do you think?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:50, Reply)

you have turned up wearing only a puppy posing pouch
And for that reason I'm out
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:54, Reply)

Whereas
Deborah Meaden is dripping wet.

She wants ME in.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:56, Reply)

and on that note! night!

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 12 Sep 2010, 23:58, Reply)

Night TGB

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 0:00, Reply)

me too
night jtdf and the rest of you feckers. I 'm off to dream about TGB and motorbikes.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 0:01, Reply)

And primary school children.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 0:07, Reply)

damn fucking straight

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 13 Sep 2010, 9:51, Reply)