There are so many jobs I want to do
I'd like to be a scuba diving instructor in the great barrier reef
I'd like to make corsets for a living and not have to leave the house
I'd like to have my own cupcakery and have all the waitresses wear 50s themed dresses
I'd like to work in a zoo, making sure all the animals have enough cuddles.
I'd like to be a lifeguard
I'd like to in the merchant navy
I'd like to be a TV extra.

OK I'm done. I'd really like my headache to go away, sadface.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:26, 4 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

"were 50s themed dresses"
I'd love to be served by animated costumes, it'd be like Fantasia or Beauty and The Beast.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:28, Reply)

oh shut your face I've got the worst headache ever
(I just typed every by accident and had to erase it)
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:29, Reply)

This is where I go "have you had any painkillers"
then you say something stupid like "no I don't like using painkillers"
(PsychoChomp, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:33, Reply)

haha fuck that, I've had all the painkillers I'm allowed
Wiggy even got up at 4am to make me a medicinal joint, which is actually the only thing that has remotely helped, but I don't think I could get away with that at work.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:35, Reply)

In that case suck it up,
you'll be fine by the end of the day.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:38, Reply)

I get headaches all the time
this one is just particularly sharp. I'll survive, though not without complaining.

Psychochomp, my head huuuuuurts, waaaaaaaaah!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:40, Reply)

MTFU

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:43, Reply)

STFU

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:51, Reply)

OMGWTFBBQ

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:51, Reply)

ILB

( broadsword, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:03, Reply)

that'd be ace

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:30, Reply)

I've been a lifeguard.
it's really not all it's shacked up to be Kitty. People are rude and idiotic. And more so when they've had a few to drink and go to the beach.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:29, Reply)

yeah I'd probably get sick of it pretty quickly
I like the idea of saving people's lives, but there's not much call for it in my job.

I just have to hope that someone gets stuck up some scaffolding so I can use my mad pole skills to go and rescue them.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:30, Reply)

I liked it too, until I realised how cliquey the other lifesavers were,
and how dangerous it could be to have to be the one doing rescuing. One rescue was enough for me. I quit at the end of that summer.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:32, Reply)

Oh yeah, I hadn't really thought about actually going out there and rescuing someone
I'm rubbish at trying to get out of the sea when it's a bit undertow-ish. Plus I don't suit red swimsuits. I can imagine a lot of lifeguards being all baywatch and douchey.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:36, Reply)

I used to be really good at it all,
I had one of the best times in my summer's group for the 1km swim. But yeah. Soon as you get people in swimsuits the cliques come out.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:41, Reply)

In Newquay they sell hoodies that say "LIFE GUARD" on them
it's just confusing.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:44, Reply)

it's so you can see at a glance who the biggest cunts in town are
in somewhere like Newquay that is quite tricky.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:45, Reply)

Not really
just assume cuntery of everyone you lay eyes on and you probably won't be far wrong.
(berk, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:46, Reply)

assume cuntery of everyone you lay eyes on and you probably won't be far wrong.
nuke the place from orbit, it's the only way to be sure.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:47, Reply)

all of the above

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)

but the fallout would hit Exeter
and much as I love him, I'm not staying with Vipros if his appendages start falling off.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:51, Reply)

I've got a bunker

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:52, Reply)

Kitty wants to have you in her bunker

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:54, Reply)

thanks for the clarity there

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)

I was wondering though
Is it the lead-lined, reinforced concrete kind, or the sand-filled ball trap kind?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:01, Reply)

I don't know yet,
I'll let you know after the apocalypse. Oh no wait, you'll be dead, ROFL
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:02, Reply)

I won't die during the apocalypse
I've played enough Fallout to be prepared.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:04, Reply)

Oh I'm so bad at Fallout
The last time I played it I kept getting killed by a pair of supermutants even though I was trying to go the long way around and hide and stuff, so Wiggy took over to kill them whilst I went to make a brew. All I heard from the kitchen was "have you not got anything better than a fucking flick knife?!"
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:07, Reply)

Oh dear oh dear
It's one of my favourite games, and I'm quite excited about the new one coming out this month.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:13, Reply)

I want Dead Rising
I think Wiggy is sick of the two player games I have, they're too cute with not enough melee weapons.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:15, Reply)

I completed Dead Rising 2 last week
If you weren't miles away I'd lend it you. It's rather fun and infuriating in equal measures.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:17, Reply)

Bring it to the bash
and I'll post it back :D
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:24, Reply)

Hmm... will you?
Or will this be another case of me lending out something only to never ever see it again?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:26, Reply)

I am pretty trustworthy
but obviously you'd have to take my word for that. How about I lend you something as collateral?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:29, Reply)

That won't be necessary, and I can always harass you on here
Remind me closer to the day and I'll try to remember to bring it :)
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:31, Reply)

thanks :D
You really don't have to if you don't want to, you can just say you forgot to bring it and I'll go "oh silly Labs, what are you like" and just cry about it later.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:42, Reply)

what kind of provisions are in there?
Our marriage depends on it, choose wisely.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:00, Reply)

meat
and various fruit crumbles.

and squirty cream.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:03, Reply)

haha
20 points for all of the above, but minus 50 points for no anchovies.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:08, Reply)

they go without saying

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:09, Reply)

ok fair enough
I redeem your 50 points.

Although anything I mention now you could just say "well obviously that's in there". Sly, Vipros, sly.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:12, Reply)

I actually thought of writing anchovies though.

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:13, Reply)

I'm surprised you didn't
I thought they would be top of the list. They would also keep out most other people who might try and hijack our bunker.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:16, Reply)

I'm very tired
so my brain isn't working quite right
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:18, Reply)

depends on the wind direction
but I doubt it.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)

prevailing winds from the south west or west south west
so chances are that the wind will be in this direction
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)

I thought nukes were super far reaching
if not, what are they so bloody worried about?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)

alright poppet
I tried to go on msn to say hello! but msn doesn't seem to work on this computer
( broadsword, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:34, Reply)

Your computer hates me, I think.
But hello to you too :)
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:35, Reply)

I think its me my computer hates :/
am on skype if you fancy saying hello
( broadsword, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:37, Reply)

urgh skype.
you just reminded me I have to set that up for my parents so I can talk to them while I'm away!
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:40, Reply)

Would you really like to hug a gibbon?
Or a boa constrictor?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:29, Reply)

in soviet russia
boa constrictor hug you
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:31, Reply)

*books flight*

( broadsword, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:40, Reply)

Broadsword loves pythons
Trouser pythons
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:51, Reply)

I was up for a hug with a boa
pythons were never mentioned, please get your facts straight
( broadsword, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)

unless they're another name for the same thing
not too up on snakes really
( broadsword, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)

I'm just telling it like I sees it

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)

If I ever move back to the north west
I would cheerfully go in to business with you running a 50s-themed cupcakery. If that helps. I don't have any venture capital (if that's what it's called) unless you accept magical arse money, though.
(berk, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:42, Reply)

haha lol for magical arse money
I've got my photographer coming on Friday to photograph the cakes and then Gonz is going to do me a delivery website, so hopefully in a few years I might have some venture capital myself and then we can be all Cupcakes + Venture Capital = PROFIT
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:47, Reply)

Sounds like a plan to me!
There's an amazing 50's themed diner/bowling alley somewhere in a basement in Notting Hill, if you've ever been?
(berk, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:54, Reply)

At The Lanes in Bristol
One of the women working there wore a 50s Americana dress. She was SMOKING hot.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)

From the pictures it looks pretty similar
sadly there was no smoking hot waitress at the one in London.

EDIT - in fact, I may check that place out if I end up going to the Bristol bash, it looks pretty cool.
(berk, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)

Clearly inferior then

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)

Clearly not
the London one had ME in it.
(berk, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:01, Reply)

Myalgic Encephalopathy?

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:11, Reply)

Did you just look that up?
I was thinking along the same lines, but couldn't remember what it stood for.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:12, Reply)

haha yes I did
I couldn't remember it, let alone spell it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:17, Reply)

Myalgic encephalomyelitis, I think you'll find

(berk, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:21, Reply)

doh
DAMN YOU GOOGLE. And the ME society.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:23, Reply)

that sounds awesome!
I've never been to London town. Trufact.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:01, Reply)

Really?!
Good grief, and I thought I was a sheltered northern type! When are you heading back after the bash?
(berk, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:05, Reply)

Saturday afternoon methinks.
I've been around the world and stuff (no not in the slutty metaphor way) so I'm not that sheltered, I've just not been around that much of Engerland.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:08, Reply)

So the 22nd will be the first time you've been to london?

(PsychoChomp, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:18, Reply)

Oh I forgot, I went to Brixton once for 2 hours for a dance audition
and left again, so technicall I have set foot in London, but other than that, yes it will be. Was that a trick question?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:23, Reply)

No it wasn't a trick question.
You probably won't see much of london when you're there on the 22nd, just Euston, the pub and wherever you end up for the night.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:25, Reply)

That's ok
I want to go to London for a long weekend to see some sights some time, but I'm too skint at the moment. Wiggy's uncle is head chef at a restaurant down there somewhere so hopefully I'll get a free meal out of it. Wiggy goes down there a lot for work, he took photos of the Irregular Choice shop and the Hummingbird Bakery to lord it over me.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:31, Reply)

I guess if you're staying at Lampito's
then you may have other plans, not least of which is being hungover, but I shall be going for a wander round Borough market and other food-y type places on the Saturday. If you (and any other member of LAAK etc) want to come with that would probably be more fun than going on my own :)
(berk, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:36, Reply)

that would be nice, thanks, I'll see what they say
Me and Applebite and getting the 3.20pm train home so we'll definitely be wanting some food before then.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 11 Oct 2010, 10:43, Reply)