I felt really bad for her.
Stupid backwards upside down Australians.

(Sorry, Poppet)
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:25, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I thought it was funny.
But then, I'm ONE SICK MOTHER.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:26, Reply)

Oh yes you are, Jeff.
Is your name actually Jeff? Out of interest.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:27, Reply)

No. It's not.
It's nothing like Jeff.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:30, Reply)

My real name is also nothing like Lampito

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:42, Reply)

That's mental.
How did you come up with the name?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)

It's a character in a Greek play
She speaks in a regional accent, is fat and horny and very crude. I thought it was apt.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:53, Reply)

You're Greek?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:59, Reply)

I do ancient Greek

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:02, Reply)

You seem to have missed an 's' from that post
Grandad fucker.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:05, Reply)

Oi moi!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:17, Reply)

Does the 'Big Daddy' chant from World Of Sport
*Easy!* *Easy!*
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:37, Reply)

you do fuck dogs though yeah?

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:45, Reply)

Of course.
I go speed-dating in Battersea.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)

Thank fuck for that
you need a few simple truths to cling to in life and you being partial to porking a pekingese is one of mine.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)

I don't like Chinese food
But I'll stick my Rodney in a Rhodesian Ridgeback before you can say 'Walkies!'

I actually give myself sweets and take myself off to the woods to meet the puppies I've left there.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:01, Reply)

i really want to know how amberl is getting on with scrabbleboy
also i have houseguests for a whole bloody week from tomorrow. man this is going to annoy me. unless it is someone i am boning, or a friend who is actually living here for a while, i hate guests, meaning i can't just collapse with a book or on here after work, but have to be POLITE and shit.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:31, Reply)

Me too.
She was given top advice earlier.

EDIT: Take no news as 'good' news.

If you know what I mean!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)

dude
i think my cushions know what you mean.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)

I'm really not following you at all.
Your cushions?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:38, Reply)

Is she referring to her boobies?

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:39, Reply)

first inanimate objects i saw
implying that your comment was so unsubtle even the cushions would understand it.

BK - you're a sick sick man.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:39, Reply)

Thanks!

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:41, Reply)

Gotcha.
You and your crazy legal argument! Cushions. I ask you.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)

the other thing in my eyeline
is houmous. that would have confused you just as badly.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, Reply)

Houmous is wisest of all the dips
So I could have believed it.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:46, Reply)

this one is
it's jalapeno houmous. it was excellent.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)

Using the term 'houmousexuals' would have been fun though.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:46, Reply)

I like this

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)

Too little too late I'm afraid.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)

Ooh yeah!
Forgot about that.

EDIT - Fuck the guests 'swipe
Come to the bash!
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)

oh the guests aren't why i can't make the bash
they're working in london all week, so will have my spare room/keys and can sort themselves out.

boss' leaving do, sadly, my attendance is non-negotiable!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:39, Reply)

It is if he's leaving, surely? :)

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:40, Reply)

she!
no, she is a really really good mate, so.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)

Ah, that's fair enough then
I told my boss at my last job when he announced he was leaving that we were all just going to shit in a box for him.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, Reply)

delightful

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)

We didn't get on
And I was in an obnoxious mood :)
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)

well no shit sherlock
(see what i did there, did ya, did ya???)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:49, Reply)

I think so
But I may have to consult the houmous to be sure.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)

you can't
i've eaten some and binned the rest (i hate people who put dips back in the fridge, shudder. i am such a dreadful waster of food!)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:54, Reply)

I want some houmous now :(

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:56, Reply)

it was indeed a nice dinner
2 poppadums and some houmous.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:58, Reply)

Urgh, guests.
I like my solitude.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)

yes
exactly! they just mess it up.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)

I think I could happily live alone with the internet and a cat.
OH GOD WHAT HAVE I BECOME
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:49, Reply)

everyone on here??
except me. i am allergic to teh kittez.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)

Sounds great to me

(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:56, Reply)

Hifive!
What kind of cat would you like?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:02, Reply)

I prefer playing minesweeper.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, Reply)

I met a guy the other week who boasted that he was the 2nd best at that in the country
I had no response for him. I just wanted to slap him.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)

think the comic book guy from the simpsons
"ooohhhhhhhh i've wasted my life"
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)

Yeah but I have the same hair and beard as him
and am, only slightly, smaller. People in glass houses and what not.

edot - oooooohhhh I've wasted my life.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)

there are worse people to model yourself on
hitler, for example
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)

Swipe
For example.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)

much as you would pay millions
not everyone wants to bone me quite as badly as you!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:52, Reply)

More internet lies

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:53, Reply)

aha
this is how you are trying to get around not doing as you are told and starting a new nice left handed thread. stubborn beast.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:55, Reply)

I didn't start the thread.
I was merely putting you in the same bracket as Herr Hitler.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:57, Reply)

i'd put you in the same shower he used
let's put it that way
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:00, Reply)

You'd gas me?
Well after that jalapeno houmous all you'd have to do would be breather on me.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:01, Reply)

i have just cleaned my teeth ACTUALLY
minty fresh
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:03, Reply)

More lies.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:04, Reply)

fortunately
you are many miles away. therefore you will just have to take my word for it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:05, Reply)

Yeah, lucky for me.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:07, Reply)

i am not speaking to you again
until you MOVE OVER to the left!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:10, Reply)

You move over.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:11, Reply)

if that is how you speak to all the ladies
i am not surprised you have your bed all to yourself.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:15, Reply)

It's just the way I speak to you, Swipe.
You're special like that.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:16, Reply)

i'm special in lots of ways
some of them don't even involve licking windows
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:20, Reply)

But they all involve special needs.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:21, Reply)

keep your needs out of this

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:24, Reply)

Thought you hated these right handed threads?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:26, Reply)

YES
sort it
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:28, Reply)

NO

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:30, Reply)

hitler Bert, Monty, TGB, Mandelson, Redknapp
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:52, Reply)

Badum chiiiii
This is my new favourite game. That and Robot Unicorn Attack.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)

What are you supposed to do?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:57, Reply)

That's the whole point.
You work it out. My last score was 140 :D
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:59, Reply)

Well give me a bit of a clue.
I've got wine to drink and people on the Internet to mock.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:04, Reply)

somehow i am sensing this is a dig at me...

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:05, Reply)

Not at all.
If it was aimed at you, it would imply you were 'special' as it is, there are lots of people for me to mock.

The fact your old housemate curled out a steamer on your carpet just makes it easy!

I've been very supportive of the PINK gym purchases have I not?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:08, Reply)

no!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:10, Reply)

I've just seen the other dig.
Which I've acknowledge is at you.

The comment above was just a general statement and not aimed at you in the slightest.

Promise.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:12, Reply)

no!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:15, Reply)

Stop saying 'no!'
Look. Further up the page, I've accused Vampito of being a Greek grandad fucker.

*fears the Swipe hate*
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:17, Reply)

NO!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:19, Reply)

Does the sad face with the eyes too
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:22, Reply)

nononnononononononononononononononono

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:23, Reply)

Then please accept my apologies if I've offended you.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:26, Reply)

oh come on. clearly i am just going to say...
NO!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:27, Reply)

Please.
(I know this'll go so far to the right of the screen you'll eventually says yes to shut me up).
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:36, Reply)

FINE!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:41, Reply)

So that's a 'yes' then?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:42, Reply)

it's a feminine "fine"
you can draw your own conclusions
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:44, Reply)

You need to link lines of colours
clicky clicky funtimes. RUA is incredibly straight.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:06, Reply)

I'm very hurt by that comment.
*sulks in stupid backwards upside-down-land*
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:50, Reply)