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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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I can't believe everyone is doing some more fun than posting on here this evening.
Even Bob has something better to do.

What's going on?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:49, 263 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
Gears of War 2

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:51, Reply)
generation kill
whats bob?
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:53, Reply)
My tv had gone off : (
Something to do with living in a valley and the rain we're having.

I am drinking alcohol if that helps.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:53, Reply)
Shame
Whitechapel is on next.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:55, Reply)
I have just started watching this - a few minutes late but thanks to Sky live pause it's not a problem
unless you spoil it as I am a few minutes behind you.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:11, Reply)
I missed the start of it
But I'm recording it, thanks to Sky+ I'll watch it later of skip through all the adverts.

I might open a bottle of wine as well.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:14, Reply)
Kerazy mofo!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:17, Reply)
You know it sista!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:21, Reply)
I am on diazepam this evening (nearly had a seizure earlier) and on Twitter trying to convince people I am not responsible for the latest Chris Moyles spoof

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:17, Reply)
I hope Moyles isn't responsible for the near-seizure.
I know he's a cunt, but that is taking it too far.

(Out of interest, what is the latest Moyles spoof?)
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:20, Reply)
Moyles isn't responsible. Just triggered by over-tiredness.
Someone has set up a spoof Twitter account which is almost identical to his main account & is saying he has quit Radio One. Lots of celebs have retweeted it thinking it's genuine. Only the # of followers gives it away as being a spoof.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:24, Reply)
Maybe Moyles has set it up, just to see what the reaction would be?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:25, Reply)
Unlikely - particularly as it's pretty clear he doesn't care what people think.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:28, Reply)
I don't think I've ever listened to him on the radio.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)
You have missed nothing.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:34, Reply)
That comes as a relief.
I'd have hated to have missed the most talented DJ in the history of the world.

Would I be right in thinking he is a fat twat?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:36, Reply)
Yes. Very fat. Very twattish

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:38, Reply)
I'm glad I've missed him.
Just a shame the salary that keeps him in pies comes from the licence fee.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:40, Reply)
Yep. £550k a year apparently.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:41, Reply)
What a spawney cunt the fat twat is.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:04, Reply)
I am feeling very grumpy
cute man has not texted back. What is the point in angst ridden mental flailings along the lines of 'Oh, should I go for a drink with this man who is very very fit indeed even if I have a boyfriend, with whom things have not been going at all well lately, oh but I have morals, no I shouldn't, but he is very fit, yes I should, no I really probably shouldn't, I can't do that to my other half...'
What is the point if he doesn't bloody text back, eh? WHAT IS THE POINT?
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:59, Reply)
You sound like you're engineering
Some sort of 'try before you buy' situation.

If you're that unhappy with your current bloke, give him the Spanish archer before you start seeing someone else. It'll save a lot of pain and you might even salvage a friendship.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:02, Reply)
Oh, it's all just a hideous mess
I don't think I could cheat on him but, you know...devil on my shoulder and all that. *sigh*
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:10, Reply)
He'll find out you're thinking of going for a drink with someone else
And it'll get messy.

From experience (on both sides of the fence), decide if the relationship you're in is worth working at, or if you think you'll be better off either on your own, or with someone else.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:16, Reply)
I know it's sense
I shouldn't, and I probably won't see this other bloke. But dear god, I want to BADLY.
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:25, Reply)
Now is the time to think.....what kind of girlfriend are you going to be.
After this it will be set in stone.

A pretty face isn't always all it's cracked up to be.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:29, Reply)
Well that says a lot about your current relationship.
I think you know what you've got to do.

Maybe 'hot bloke' (as we don't have a name for him), is actually a nice guy and thinking, 'I won't text that Berk as she is in a relationship and whilst I like her, I don't want to cause her or the bloke she is seeing at the moment problems.... if only she was single'
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:29, Reply)
I conveniently neglected to mention
my relationship status to cute man. If he's not texting back, it's probably for some other reason and is also probably for the best - I've never been in this kind of situation before and whilst I'd like to think I wouldn't cheat, I'm not sure I want to find out what I'm capable of when temptation is, as it were, sexily dancing my way...
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:39, Reply)
Oh dear
What a quandary. Maybe the drinky thing is not a good idea.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:40, Reply)
It's a right shitter
*sighs*
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:44, Reply)
I'm going to risk being the cause of much mirth by playing moral arbiter
But it's not really fair on either your bloke or the lad who doesn't know you're attached.
But if he's really that pretty and your relationship's not going the way you want it to....
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)
I completely agree
it isn't fair on anyone. Even on me - how come some people are totally fine with putting themselves about a bit, and I'm tying myself in anguished knots even considering the possibility of going for a drink - not dinner, or going back to his. Just a drink.
Loving the caveat at the end btw...
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:53, Reply)
Maybe it's because you have morals.

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:57, Reply)
I don't think I'm really the person to be moralistic
So thought I'd be the angel and devil on your shoulder.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:00, Reply)
Or, look at it the other way.
Lets say you go for a drink with 'hot bloke' and it becomes apparent that he could be yours. If he then finds out you've dumped a boyfriend to be with him, as a result of that drink. He'll be 'hmm, she doesn't seem the most trustworthy, I don't think I want to be with her'.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:03, Reply)
There is this too
lose/lose all round really, isn't it?
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:04, Reply)
Just be truthful with him.
If he's a good guy and if he wants you then he will wait till you've sorted out current boyfriend.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:07, Reply)
Assuming he ever texts back, of course!

(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:10, Reply)
Sometimes I don't regret the lack of interest from guys I've had.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:13, Reply)
Aww, sure you'll have had your fair share Blousie

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:14, Reply)
She does have nearly 20 years of giggity on me...

(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:20, Reply)
I'm now referring to it as giggity
:)
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:21, Reply)
At least you can do
what you like with whom you please, when you please. Well, when you're not deciding to be celibate!
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:15, Reply)
If only : (
Please don't make the mistakes I made and let lack of confidance ruin your life.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:21, Reply)
Lack of confidence isn't something I suffer overly from any more
a bit, obviously, as does everyone - but I'm much better than I was. And I'm sure you could get plenty if you wanted to! Perhaps you don't put yourself out there enough?
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:27, Reply)
It doesn't have to be lose/lose
You can end the relationship you're in if you don't think you'll be happy in the long term.

Total number of losers there. One. Your boyfriend.

You can then, with a clear head and without the devil whispering sweet nothings in your ear, consider your next move.

No losers there.

If new bloke wants you. WIN!

If new bloke still hasn't texted back, what have you lost? Nothing. Bar a boyfriend who is driving you into the arms of another.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:15, Reply)
Yes, but
I don't want to hurt him. I really, truly don't. Seriously, if breaking up with him would break my heart and not his, I'd be fine with it.
/feels pathetic.
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:20, Reply)
So you should be unhappy to spare his feelings?
Get a bit of backbone and do what's right for you.

What is wrong with your current relationship, anything? Or have you just found a newer model?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:22, Reply)
We went on holiday together
he irritated and infuriated me to the point of despair. Ever since we got back I've just been getting more and more annoyed with him. It genuinely could just be me being intolerant though!
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:24, Reply)
Bollocks.
Even if you have suddenly becovme intolerant, he still makes you annoyed. If you like being annoyed then stay with him. If you don't, either work out how you can move forward together in a way that'll make you both happy, or end things.

Does he know he annoys you?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:28, Reply)
He didn't
until he asked me why I was snapping at him over the weekend. So I told him and he looked utterly destroyed. (I didn't tell him about cute man, just about the doubts I'd been having)
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)
At least that was honest
If slightly brutal.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:34, Reply)
He asked!
I had been bottling it up until then..
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:41, Reply)
Well, give the boyfriend chance to digest this news
have a chat, see what solutions he suggests and make a decision based on that.

Do you live together?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)
No
he moved to the city I work in at the start of the year, and as I happened to be looking for a new place at the same time, I put a bit of pressure on to move in together - save money etc etc, but he was having none of it, said he wanted to have his own place for six months, which became a year, which became 'we'll move in together when we know what's happening with your contract next autumn' but since going on holiday with him I really really doubt I can live with him unless BIG changes are made.
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:40, Reply)
Hope it works out
Can we lecture you for real on Friday?
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:46, Reply)
Get me drunk
and I shall probably bore you to tears with it :P
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
They will be drunk tears
But yeah, ok. Then I can rub it in and tell you about the tremendous drinky evening I had with a pretty lady last night :)
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:52, Reply)
This big change.
It'll be you moving in with someone else. I'm not Mystic Jeff or anything, but you sound like your mind is made up. Why else ask us? You know the answer, but you're scared of upsetting the boyfriend. Understandable, shows you care.

I hope things work themselves out quickly and whatever you decide isn't drawn out over months of misery.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
Cheers, boyo
I hope it all works out too.
/sigh
(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:00, Reply)
If only I had these sorts of quandries.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:18, Reply)
My quandries are
Should I cheat on the 12 cans of Thatchers I've got in the fridge, or go to the pub?

9 times out of 10, I'll two-time and do both.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:21, Reply)
You trollop.

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:37, Reply)
Just watched Terminator Salvation.
It thoroughly deserves the 6.8/10 imdb voted it.
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:18, Reply)
It's not brilliant
Christian bale is particularly shit
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:20, Reply)
oh, now
he wasn't so bad in Little Women
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:21, Reply)
I can't say I have watched it or read it.
I like him as batman though.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:22, Reply)
are you fucking kidding
he was so fucking shit as batman it was painful to watch
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:26, Reply)
I sort of enjoyed it, if only for the explosions and robots fighting etc.
The script was loose, the ending was weak and there were a few wtf's, but still, explosions and robots fighting etc.
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:23, Reply)
You can't go wrong with explosions, robots fighting etc
Gets my vote every time.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:27, Reply)
having a hard time tackling this pimps and hoes issue
am now thinking of making a corset
which is what I've been reading about the last half hour
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:20, Reply)

K Swiss! What's new. Corsets get my vote.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:21, Reply)

Corsetas get my vote.

Lowered, with wide wheels and a light under it so when you go cruising you look dead cool.

Evening Bob.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:23, Reply)
but I don't know anything about sewing, I'm going to have to get my gran to help
the old bitch
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:26, Reply)
Not a fan of granny then?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:30, Reply)
not really
I mean, she's my grandma, but she never treated me like her granddaughter, more like a bug that she couldn't kill
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:33, Reply)
But if she makes you a corset
Then all is forgiven?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:34, Reply)
haha not really holding a grudge here, just hoping she'll help me out
she lightened up after my grandpa died
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:36, Reply)
This isn't the happiest story you've ever told on here K.
You know that, yes?

When is your hoes and pimps party?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:38, Reply)
just walked home so feeling v smug. and cold.
and it's the new series of the only reality tv show i would ever allow... AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:16, Reply)
I used to be a catalogue model you know.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:17, Reply)
orly??

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:21, Reply)
Yeah!
Plumbers tools bi monthly.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:22, Reply)
did you just call him a bi tool??

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:24, Reply)
Yes : )

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:29, Reply)
he seems to be ignoring you. shout!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:30, Reply)
YES!!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:31, Reply)
Bi tool?
This is the first time I have been called this. Do I take it as a compliment?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:31, Reply)
No

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)
the stark simplicity of this answer
made me laugh
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:34, Reply)
So...you were...insulting me?
I thought we were DnB buddies or something.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)
I'm a fickle woman.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:45, Reply)
so.......
just a woman then, aye?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
yarly
I modelled for Tribalectic, honour.co.uk, Grattan, Saga and Kays.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:24, Reply)
really really?!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:24, Reply)
I'm too short for catwalk
And these days, all my manager will put me forward for are Just For Men, and Arran Knitwear.

I'm a shadow of my former dashing self.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:27, Reply)
if true this is quite impressive
i might have to be nicer to you
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:30, Reply)
You just want discount on a twin-set from the Freemans book.
'I'm not paying £1.27 a week for 120 weeks' thinks Swipe.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:31, Reply)
Some times you make me LOL

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)
It's rare though, isn't it Blousie?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:33, Reply)
Not rare.
Just welcome when it happens.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)
Thanks very much.
(Starts a Blousie laughter chart, awards self first gold star)
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:38, Reply)
note the "sometimes"
i did
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:34, Reply)
What are you most offended by Swipe?
The fact I suggested you'd want a twin-set from Freemans, or the fact I suggested you'd buy in on the 'never-never'?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:36, Reply)
i really don't know
it was a double stealth missile, that's for sure
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:41, Reply)
*BEAMS WITH PRIDE*

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
You mean stalk me more.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:34, Reply)
i'd be a shit stalker
i can hardly turn on a laptop never mind use it to find you!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)
You are doing it RIGHT NOW
Now please please stop.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:36, Reply)
fine
you are officially on ignore
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:40, Reply)
LIES ON THE INTERNET

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:41, Reply)
sssssssssh.
ignoreboy.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, Reply)
lies on the internet

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:45, Reply)

ignoreboy
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:46, Reply)

lies on the internet
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:49, Reply)
you can move this downstairs again now
it's too far over to the right and it hurts my eyes reading your waffle one letter at a time
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
DO IT YOURSELF

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
sometimes
on the very rare occasions when a man won't put out, a girl has no choice.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:54, Reply)
Beggars can't be choosers and all that.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:56, Reply)
i never beg

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:01, Reply)
Lies.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:04, Reply)
i'd be a shit stalker you say
I agree, it took you over a year to find out that someone had stalked a shit out on your spare room carpet.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:42, Reply)
urgh
will you stop reminding me already, makes me want to drive over to kingston and kill her!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:42, Reply)
Hahahaha
Easy pickings.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
At what age did you model?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:24, Reply)
Did you see on the next what happened in the final of the Australian Top Model show?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:18, Reply)
no, i only allow myself to watch the american one
if it doesn't have tyra making a twat of herself, it's not the same!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:20, Reply)
This'll make you piss yourself
www.youtube.com/watch?v=MqiD0KTZrKE
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:23, Reply)
oh wait
you mean when they announced the wrong winner? my colleague showed me that!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:24, Reply)
I felt really bad for her.
Stupid backwards upside down Australians.

(Sorry, Poppet)
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:25, Reply)
I thought it was funny.
But then, I'm ONE SICK MOTHER.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:26, Reply)
Oh yes you are, Jeff.
Is your name actually Jeff? Out of interest.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:27, Reply)
No. It's not.
It's nothing like Jeff.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:30, Reply)
My real name is also nothing like Lampito

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:42, Reply)
That's mental.
How did you come up with the name?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)
It's a character in a Greek play
She speaks in a regional accent, is fat and horny and very crude. I thought it was apt.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:53, Reply)
You're Greek?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:59, Reply)
I do ancient Greek

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:02, Reply)
You seem to have missed an 's' from that post
Grandad fucker.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:05, Reply)
Oi moi!

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:17, Reply)
Does the 'Big Daddy' chant from World Of Sport
*Easy!* *Easy!*
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:37, Reply)
you do fuck dogs though yeah?

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:45, Reply)
Of course.
I go speed-dating in Battersea.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)
Thank fuck for that
you need a few simple truths to cling to in life and you being partial to porking a pekingese is one of mine.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
I don't like Chinese food
But I'll stick my Rodney in a Rhodesian Ridgeback before you can say 'Walkies!'

I actually give myself sweets and take myself off to the woods to meet the puppies I've left there.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:01, Reply)
i really want to know how amberl is getting on with scrabbleboy
also i have houseguests for a whole bloody week from tomorrow. man this is going to annoy me. unless it is someone i am boning, or a friend who is actually living here for a while, i hate guests, meaning i can't just collapse with a book or on here after work, but have to be POLITE and shit.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:31, Reply)
Me too.
She was given top advice earlier.

EDIT: Take no news as 'good' news.

If you know what I mean!
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)
dude
i think my cushions know what you mean.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)
I'm really not following you at all.
Your cushions?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:38, Reply)
Is she referring to her boobies?

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:39, Reply)
first inanimate objects i saw
implying that your comment was so unsubtle even the cushions would understand it.

BK - you're a sick sick man.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:39, Reply)
Thanks!

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:41, Reply)
Gotcha.
You and your crazy legal argument! Cushions. I ask you.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)
the other thing in my eyeline
is houmous. that would have confused you just as badly.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, Reply)
Houmous is wisest of all the dips
So I could have believed it.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:46, Reply)
this one is
it's jalapeno houmous. it was excellent.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)
Using the term 'houmousexuals' would have been fun though.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:46, Reply)
I like this

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)
Too little too late I'm afraid.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
Ooh yeah!
Forgot about that.

EDIT - Fuck the guests 'swipe
Come to the bash!
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)
oh the guests aren't why i can't make the bash
they're working in london all week, so will have my spare room/keys and can sort themselves out.

boss' leaving do, sadly, my attendance is non-negotiable!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:39, Reply)
It is if he's leaving, surely? :)

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:40, Reply)
she!
no, she is a really really good mate, so.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)
Ah, that's fair enough then
I told my boss at my last job when he announced he was leaving that we were all just going to shit in a box for him.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, Reply)
delightful

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)
We didn't get on
And I was in an obnoxious mood :)
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
well no shit sherlock
(see what i did there, did ya, did ya???)
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:49, Reply)
I think so
But I may have to consult the houmous to be sure.
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
you can't
i've eaten some and binned the rest (i hate people who put dips back in the fridge, shudder. i am such a dreadful waster of food!)
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:54, Reply)
I want some houmous now :(

(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:56, Reply)
it was indeed a nice dinner
2 poppadums and some houmous.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:58, Reply)
Urgh, guests.
I like my solitude.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)
yes
exactly! they just mess it up.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)
I think I could happily live alone with the internet and a cat.
OH GOD WHAT HAVE I BECOME
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:49, Reply)
everyone on here??
except me. i am allergic to teh kittez.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
Sounds great to me

(berk, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:56, Reply)
Hifive!
What kind of cat would you like?
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:02, Reply)
I prefer playing minesweeper.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, Reply)
I met a guy the other week who boasted that he was the 2nd best at that in the country
I had no response for him. I just wanted to slap him.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
think the comic book guy from the simpsons
"ooohhhhhhhh i've wasted my life"
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
Yeah but I have the same hair and beard as him
and am, only slightly, smaller. People in glass houses and what not.

edot - oooooohhhh I've wasted my life.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
there are worse people to model yourself on
hitler, for example
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
Swipe
For example.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
much as you would pay millions
not everyone wants to bone me quite as badly as you!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:52, Reply)
More internet lies

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:53, Reply)
aha
this is how you are trying to get around not doing as you are told and starting a new nice left handed thread. stubborn beast.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:55, Reply)
I didn't start the thread.
I was merely putting you in the same bracket as Herr Hitler.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:57, Reply)
i'd put you in the same shower he used
let's put it that way
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:00, Reply)
You'd gas me?
Well after that jalapeno houmous all you'd have to do would be breather on me.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:01, Reply)
i have just cleaned my teeth ACTUALLY
minty fresh
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:03, Reply)
More lies.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:04, Reply)
fortunately
you are many miles away. therefore you will just have to take my word for it.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:05, Reply)
Yeah, lucky for me.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:07, Reply)
i am not speaking to you again
until you MOVE OVER to the left!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:10, Reply)
You move over.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:11, Reply)
if that is how you speak to all the ladies
i am not surprised you have your bed all to yourself.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:15, Reply)
It's just the way I speak to you, Swipe.
You're special like that.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:16, Reply)
i'm special in lots of ways
some of them don't even involve licking windows
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:20, Reply)
But they all involve special needs.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:21, Reply)
keep your needs out of this

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:24, Reply)
Thought you hated these right handed threads?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:26, Reply)
YES
sort it
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:28, Reply)
NO

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:30, Reply)

hitler Bert, Monty, TGB, Mandelson, Redknapp
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:52, Reply)
Badum chiiiii
This is my new favourite game. That and Robot Unicorn Attack.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
What are you supposed to do?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:57, Reply)
That's the whole point.
You work it out. My last score was 140 :D
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:59, Reply)
Well give me a bit of a clue.
I've got wine to drink and people on the Internet to mock.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:04, Reply)
somehow i am sensing this is a dig at me...

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:05, Reply)
Not at all.
If it was aimed at you, it would imply you were 'special' as it is, there are lots of people for me to mock.

The fact your old housemate curled out a steamer on your carpet just makes it easy!

I've been very supportive of the PINK gym purchases have I not?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:08, Reply)
no!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:10, Reply)
I've just seen the other dig.
Which I've acknowledge is at you.

The comment above was just a general statement and not aimed at you in the slightest.

Promise.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:12, Reply)
no!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:15, Reply)
Stop saying 'no!'
Look. Further up the page, I've accused Vampito of being a Greek grandad fucker.

*fears the Swipe hate*
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:17, Reply)
NO!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:19, Reply)

Does the sad face with the eyes too
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:22, Reply)
nononnononononononononononononononono

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:23, Reply)
Then please accept my apologies if I've offended you.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:26, Reply)
oh come on. clearly i am just going to say...
NO!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:27, Reply)
Please.
(I know this'll go so far to the right of the screen you'll eventually says yes to shut me up).
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:36, Reply)
FINE!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:41, Reply)
So that's a 'yes' then?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:42, Reply)
it's a feminine "fine"
you can draw your own conclusions
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:44, Reply)
You need to link lines of colours
clicky clicky funtimes. RUA is incredibly straight.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:06, Reply)
I'm very hurt by that comment.
*sulks in stupid backwards upside-down-land*
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:50, Reply)
I bought some curling tongues today to go the whole curles are sexy thing.
My hair smells funny.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
my stupid hair is too thick and wavy for those
the most effective thing i've found for really lovely curls are old fashioned heated rollers!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
Why does your hair smell funny? Have you covered it in clown poo?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:52, Reply)
No
It just smells weird after using them. I wonder if it's cat sick.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:54, Reply)
If your hair looks good after the tonging (I don't know the term)
Start bagging up the cat sick.

You can sell to those people who spent £300 a month of shampoo, tell them it's the latest thing.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:58, Reply)
somehow
i am sensing a dig at me...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:04, Reply)
Yeah.
That one is.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:11, Reply)
I've started a new thread
feel free to contribute.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:55, Reply)
I'd rather not.
I'm going to bed.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:56, Reply)
Night Blousie!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:57, Reply)
WE WILL NEVER SPEAK AGAIN
You insulted me DEEPLY.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:58, Reply)
christ lucky bgb
how do i manage this?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:59, Reply)
don't leave us!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:58, Reply)
Nos da

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:59, Reply)
meet my new puppet, any ideas for a name?

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:18, Reply)
Name it
Swipeface.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:21, Reply)
I actually think Bert suits him.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:22, Reply)
Swipe/ Bert
Both as mentaloid as each other.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:23, Reply)
just because you're desperate to put your fist inside it
don't tar bobby with your brush.

shit that was grim even for me.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:22, Reply)
My dear, that is simply not becoming.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:24, Reply)
Not very ladylike at all
She wants to take suave lessons, she really does.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:25, Reply)
totally true though
*is unrepentant*
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:26, Reply)
This should be in the new thread Bob.
Really.

Do it.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:25, Reply)
LEFT

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:35, Reply)
ha
i knew it! well done on giving in so gracefully.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:36, Reply)
I don't know what you're talking about

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:42, Reply)
you know exactly what i am talking about

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:43, Reply)
NO I DON'T.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:45, Reply)
oh yes you do

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:49, Reply)
Stop following me around.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:50, Reply)
stop typing with your cock

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:52, Reply)

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