I find "fuck you" to be an obvious but cathartic catch-all rebuttal
I agree with Kitty, it's better to respond appropriately than to unleash a stock phrase. For example, just last night at Ballroom practice a lesbian friend of mine made some comment to which I replied "shurrup rugmuncher" and she didn't know what I meant. Fucking young people today, etc
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 11:51, 4 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

you are a paedo
aicmfp
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 11:54, Reply)

The price on my head is substantially higher than five pounds
but that's what happens when you drop your shipment at the first sign of an Imperial cruiser
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 11:55, Reply)

Paedophilia and anti-gay insults in the same post?
Nice work there, Foxtrot.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 11:54, Reply)

I thank you
*Does unnecessarily extravagant bow, practised from beginning of Viennese Waltz routine*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 11:58, Reply)

Wow, amazing comeback.
Like, I'm in shock at how witty that is.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 11:55, Reply)

Yes, well, the point I was making was
that in that instance a stock response fell flat on its arse, whereas something wittier and appropriate to the situation may not have.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 11:58, Reply)

my mum once asked me what a carpet muncher was
it was a horrible conversation.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 11:59, Reply)

Absolutely the best thing you could have done there
would have been to slowly raise your hand, whilst looking sheepishly at your shoes

"Best" in relation to creating a great QOTW post, not in relation to how it would've made you feel
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:01, Reply)

I remember being about 11 when my sister and I asked our parents what a clitoris was

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:01, Reply)

When I was about 9 my sister called me a lesbian
so I asked her what it was and she said "you". Burn.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:05, Reply)

Your sister is obviously phenomenally prescient
Is she Mystic Meg?

Insert line about claiming five pounds here
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:07, Reply)

That's like the only witty thing she's ever said
trust me.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:24, Reply)

Seems unfair to assume you that you got the looks AND the brains
although if she was able to make the kind of a call when you were only 9 it stands to reason she's psychic
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:32, Reply)

Together?!
Dude
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:07, Reply)

We'd just watched that episode of Red Dwarf
Where Rimmer forms the Committee for the Liberation and Integration of Terrifying Organisms and their Rehabilitation Into Society.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:09, Reply)

That may be the best, and most points-worthy, response to an accusation of weirdness I've ever seen

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:10, Reply)

Where's Monty?
Fine I'll do it.

"We'd just watched that episode of Red Dwarf
Where Rimmer smegs the Smeg for the Smegeration and Intesmegation of Smegifying Smegisms and their Smeg Into Smeggety"
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:24, Reply)

That took some effort on your part
So, thanks for that.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:25, Reply)

my friend's dreadfully naive mother
once asked her what fellatio was. how can you hook a husband without knowing what a blowjob is??

although she was a nurse. maybe it was the uniform.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:04, Reply)

...or perhaps she was actually very adept at blowjobs but didn't know the term
A bit like Mark van Bommel. He's very good at fightin', but he calls it "football"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 21 Oct 2010, 12:06, Reply)